Screech Pulls A Dirty Sanchez

What's happening out there today? I'm doing great here and it's time for another post. I guess you figured out that much by now, considering it was about a week since the last update. That's how I've been doing it around here lately. You know how I roll, straight from the mean streets of East Shinnston, so look out. In this edition we get to talk about another road trip to Cleveland, NBA Live 2007 updates, Yankees, Notre Dame, EDDFL, teaching little kids, dirty hoes, and who knows what else is in store for you. You'll just have to lean back and watch the show.



Road trip! Off to Cleveland for some Ring of Honor wrestling action. Me and Spank roll out of Shinnston around noon after battling in some NBA Live 2007 before leaving. More on that later. We first stop at Wal-Mart to get some fantasy basketball magazines. Also, more on that later as well. Before leaving our county, we eat at Applebee's and are fired up they don't have the select two entrees for $10 deal or whatever anymore. Now they hype up this dork from The Food Network and you can pick from like 4 different things he has a recipe for, get out of here. We get to Cleveland around 6:00 or a little before. It's about a 4 hour trip, but with messing around and not being in a rush, there you go. We hit up mostly older rap for this ride. 2Pac, Trick Daddy, some older Birdman, and of course when you get near Cleveland you have to put in Bone Thugs or it wouldn't be a Cleveland trip. We eat at some Lizard Lounge (close enough) place up there before the show, I forget the name.

Now it's off to the show. We have 2nd row tickets and we're pumped. As we get there, the line is going way down the street before the doors open. With ROH, the wrestlers are hands on and you can hang out with them like you would a regular bum. We pull in to park and we park right beside the champion, Bryan "The American Dragon" Danielson. I've raved about him before as being one of (if not the best) wrestler in the world. We pull in and see Dragon and also Samoa Joe hanging in the parking lot talking to the fans.



We see this dude pulling in driving a Mustang. He goes to park in a spot and somehow hammers on the gas and runs over a concrete uprise and mangles his car. He's sitting there for about 5 minutes not doing anything. His buddy runs out of the car and heads to the show. Weird already. Anyways, Spank walks up to this guy's window and tries to help him to move the car. The guy was cranked up on acid or something hardcore because he was a total mess. For the first hour of the show, the guy was in a trance and we got a good laugh out of him. Kids, don't do drugs. You might end up all tuned up on acid and wreck your Mustang.

We're in the building. I won't ramble on about the exact show because I know that 90% of the people reading don't even have a clue what ROH is (the shame). The matches were off the chart, the fans are the best in the business, and you get a quality experience. Everytime they come back to Cleveland, they have my money for sure. I load up on 8 new DVDs while I'm there. Yes, I'm an idiot, but nothing else to spend my money on. Outside of Joe and Danielson, we felt the presence of Jim Cornette, a true legend in this business. He may be the best on the mic in all of wrestling and he did his thing for about 10 minutes straight as he had the crowd eating out of his hand. During the intermission, we hung outside in the parking lot to get some air. While out there, we're talking to Homicide (the same that is on TNA on Thursday nights, Spike TV at 11:00). He's a huge Yankees fan and so am I. We kept getting updates on the Yanks game going on that night through our phone. A very cool guy and easily approachable. He also told us of some inside info dealing with TNA, so that was fun.



The trip back to the mean streets of Shinnston. We had to hit up White Castle again or it wouldn't be a trip. We ended up getting 13 cheeseburgers (remember they're little), 2 orders of clams, onion chips or whatever they're called, cheesesticks, and drinks that were insanely big. They mangled our order, kept apologizing, and I don't think the guy working could read or write. Someone left in front of us in the drive-thru as they were pissed. It was worth the wait for some greasy food, I liked it.

Quick sports news. My Yanks got routed in their series with the Tigers. My boys got one win, ouch. Game 2 was nuts as they had Verlander and Zumaya both throwing in triple digits. Zumaya hit 103 at least once out there on the gun that I saw. That's just nasty. The only guy that seemed to get around on these guys was Sheffield and that's because he probably has the quickest (as well as hardest) swing in all of baseball. Not much I can say. I'm happy for Jimmy Leyland though. I'm in the camp that isn't against A-Rod though. Sure, he choked in the clutch, but he still had a good year. Not MVP like as he should, but his numbers in a "bad" year are what most would consider a career year. As far as my Irish, they got the win at least against Stanford. We're finally in a stretch of lesser teams, so hopefully they don't screw it up. 5-1, next week it's UCLA. As I type this, my Bears are up 30-0 on Spank's Bills as the 4th quarter starts. That's mean.



EDDFL! Yep, fantasy NBA is right around the corner and that's what I live for. Today we had our draft lottery at my house and that was a fun time. 11 guys in the league this year and I'll be talking about that a lot more. Here's the order we're picking this year for our upcoming Draft Day on October 22nd, live from Bunny's in Fairmont:
1. Riley
2. Fleece
3. Me
4. Cork
5. Fortney
6. Spank
7. Mudcat
8. TJ
9. Sidell
10. Ozzie
11. Posey

I was wanting somewhere in the middle of the pack, but I'll take #3 and be happy with it. This is the first year that we've had a draft lotto, so it'll be fun to see how the preparation goes and how everyone's mock drafts work out.



Starting tomorrow, and for the next 6 weeks, I have to do student teaching in an elementary school in special education and I'll have my full Masters degree when all is said and done. I'm kind of excited for that, so that'll be nice when I take care of that business. I've done very little elementary work, so hopefully I don't have to smack any of those little tots around, hah. Give em the ol pimp slap. I think it'll be ok though, I'll just have to adjust.

A quick NBA Live 2007 update. Me and Spank are already done with an entire month's worth of games. Still hard, but we have a win and we're on our way now. Sure, we could wuss it down and put it on pansy level, but what's the fun in that? This will more than likely be my last game until the Nintendo Wii comes out next month, but we'll see. I want to get Bully in a few weeks for PS2, but hard to tell.

2 new CDs to the collection. They are both 2Pac compilations. One is called A Decade Of Silence. This one features 13 songs that are mixed or featuring other people and then another 7 songs that are his early years. Some of those you wouldn't even recognize as 2Pac. The other CD is called Sunset Boulevard. This one has a lot of stuff that wasn't released before and older tracks as well.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/miss_tease



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's roll out the birthday carpet for Monday, October 9th, also Columbus Day: John Lennon would've been 66. The racist, former Senate Majority Leader of the Republican Party, Trent Lott is 65. Actor Robert Wuhl goes for 55. Actor Scott Bakula is celebrating his 52nd. My boy Mike Singletary, one of the best linebackers ever, Happy 47th! Former Celtic and NY streetball legend Kenny Anderson hits 36. Golfer Annika Sorenstam also has her 36th.

2. For the locals, we're back to playing ball regular again. For a while, we'll be ballin' it up at School Square on Thursday nights. 7:00. Bring whoever you want. Then when it gets colder and when Jerry West starts, we'll move to The Lighthouse. This town is nothing but lazy bums, but spare a few hours of your week to play some ball, you won't be disappointed.

3. How come nobody is making more of the porn featuring Screech of Saved By The Bell fame? Supposedly there is a 40-minute sex tape going around. Surprisingly I haven't tried to download this mess yet, but I'm sure it'd be easy to get. Things I'm reading say he's there with 2 other chicks and the famous Dirty Sanchez move is part of this video. Don't know what that is? Look it up, but I'm guessing most know that one. Screech in porn? Sure, it's weird, but you know you're definitely interested now. You're straight lying if you say you wouldn't watch just out of wonder.

Flavor Flav & Weiner Dogs

Time flies and I don't even know about it. Has it really been another week since my last post? I guess so. October is already here too and stuff just keeps going by. Things are going great with me though, I can't complain. I'm seeing Christmas commercials and things of the like on TV, so I guess we're getting there. I'll have a variety of topics this week for the fans, so we're ready to cook something up.



Nice comments on the last blog, much appreciated. Dom, hopefully I have a non-model chick for ya for the thug ho this week that you asked for. This one doesn't appear to be in anything big, but I could be wrong with that. 200 some friends and I don't see any mention of her in videos or doing shoots. Who knows. Kristen, awesome job on the Garrett Wolfe stuff. You get my respect on that, considering a lot don't even know much about him yet sadly.

I'll bounce back between days in here, but I'll start with Sunday. We got some ball action in then. Not basketball this time, but this time we rolled with some football. No tackle since we're all old and stuff and that wouldn't be a good idea, but it was still a great time. We had 10 in attendance and went to my old high school's field. They were chalking up the main field, so we had to play on the practice field, fine by me. Hopefully we can play next week and start something regular. Anyways, we had 10 in attendance. Team 1 was Ozzie, Bart, Slim, Big Mac, and myself. We took on Fortney, Sweet Pea, Nick At Nite, Matt Sickles (I still need to get used to the whole Matty Cakes nickname, but it's a good one. Someone fill me in on how that one started.), and Swiger. Pretty competitive stuff. The first game, it was tied 10-10 (we just played by scores, so that's 10 TDs). The defense on either side didn't stop a single drive for some reason. Bart dominated. At 6'4" or whatever he is, he'd catch stuff over people and he was our main threat. I had the speed game in full effect, catching some deep passes and making some moves, so I was happy. Second game my crew won and we ended up playing to 5. I didn't get as sore as I thought, but my thighs are blazing.



Anyone been keeping up with Flavor of Love 2 on VH1? If not, you're mising out on some truly good TV drama. We're down to the finale next week and this past week got crazy. Flav invited the 3 girls' parents that were left (New York, Crazy, and Deelishis). And yes, Flav spells it Deelishis. New York's Mom was over the top, more so than New York herself. That added to the show as she was rumbling with everyone. Flav brought his 37 kids onto the show this week too, so they could do some detective work and weed these girls out for who he should kick out. Funny that I found out that Flav is a Grandpa too. He's 47 and these chicks in their early 20s are all over him, that's classic. What a pimp. Anyways, Crazy gets the boot this week because she's fake and was only on there to get her demo CD heard. I'm telling ya, take my word on this show and watch it when it's on. Next Sunday is the finale, be there!

After a week of waking up early, it was time to start the weekend in style. Spank bought NBA Live 2007 for the house. He's at my house more than he is at his, so he said why not just buy it for our crib. We got it for PlayStation 2 and it's a quality game. The gameplay is smooth and I like how it's setup. The one thing that we can't get by is how hard this game is compared to past years. We're not the type to put it on wuss level to make it easier, so we'll roll with getting our heads beat in for a while until we start to punish opponents. We picked the Knicks as our team in our franchise because they're pathetic and we're doing the co-op deal. We're both on the court at the same time, so that makes it interesting. So far so good though, it'll keep us busy, nothing else to do in Shinnston.



That night, we ended up playing Live for 9 straight hours. Yep, we were in a coma when the night was over, but that's about as good as it gets. You can't have a video game night without loads of food either. Why not go for the town's best, so we ordered off A's. One of our biggest orders in a while. Our bill was $40 before the tip. I got a steak hoagie with extra cheese, sweet peppers, and onions. I also got a small antipasta salad (the only real kind of salad to get in my opinion) and a funnel cake. Spank loads up on an Italian burger, small pizza, antipasta salad, and also a funnel cake. Big Jimmy came out to deliver it, so we hooked him up good on the tip. We're both idiots when it comes to tipping, but they deserve it, so we treat them good. Nobody else gives them nice tips, so we might as well load up.

As mentioned, another trip to Cleveland this Friday. Ring of Honor Wrestling for this year's Survival of the Fittest 2006. I know what you're thinking, especially to the non-wrestling fans. I'm actually going to drive 4 hours to see a wrestling show and drive back on the same night? Of course. I'm not thinking twice about it, especially with how good the show was in July, titled Generation Next. Road trips rock anyways, plus given the chance to see the best wrestling organization out there, it's a no-brainer.



No new CDs this time around. I know I'm due for that though. A lot of good ones coming out soon. What should be on the list in the near future? Ones I'm interested in this month include: Celly Cel "The Wild West", Ludacris "Release Therapy", Webstar "Caught In The Web", Napoleon "Loyalty Over Money", Unk "Beat'N Down Yo Block", Lloyd Banks "Rotten Apple", MC Eiht "Compton's OG", Belo "The Truth", Puff "Press Play", Layzie Bone "Cleveland", Jibbs "Jiggs Featuring Jibbs", Scarface "Made", Birdman & Lil Wayne "Like Father, Like Son", C-Rayz Walz "1975: Return Of The Beast", Dayton Family "Return To Dayton Ave", 8Ball "Light Up The Bomb", Flavor Flav "Flavor Flav", Ice-T "Gangsta Rap", and Lil Jon "Crunk Rock". Wow, I guess October will be a busy CD month for me. More than I thought, we'll see what I can come up with out of this bunch.

Bird's YouTube Moment of the Week: Anyone seen the two kids dancing around to the Crazy Frog music? If you haven't, you're in for a treat. The skinny kid cracks me up good in this. The little kid is a riot too because he acts all hard and rough throughout. Enjoy, you won't be disappointed. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgoOihBb78w&eurl=



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=25172798

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Oh yes.. Nintendo finally put out the release date for their new console, the Nintendo Wii. November 19th. And for $250, you get the system, controller, and Wii Sports thrown in. I'll be first in line for that bad boy. No XBox 360 or PS3 for me, it's all Wii since I'm a diehard Nintendo guy.

2. Birthdays.. Tuesday, October 3rd. Former Yankee, Dave Winfield is 55. Politician Al Sharpton goes for 52. One of the greatest relief pitchers ever, Dennis Eckersley, hits 52 as well. Rocker Tommy Lee is 44. Gwen Stefani turns 37, I bet that surprised some. Neve Campbell is 33. What happened to her? We saw her naked that one time and then her career went downhill. Go figure. That's all I can do for ya today.

3. A neighbor of mine down the street puts their weiner dog on a leash outside. It's funny stuff to see a weiner dog anyways as those dogs rule, but to see one stuck to a leash and tied up is quality. Maybe that's just me.

Sour Patch Kids

Movie update time. Get out there and go see Jackass 2 as soon as you can. I've been on a roll lately picking some quality movies to see that were worth it. I went to Morgantown on Saturday night with Cork and Spank. This was for a 10:05 movie at the new theater up there. Anyways, the place was so packed that the line to get tickets was out into the parking lot, no joke. Anyways, I ended up spending $20 there. I felt like I was at a Pirates games. I got the ticket for $7.50, a thing of Coke that I could've drank on for a week, nachos and cheese (at a theater, that surprised me), and of course some Sour Patch Kids. On the movie itself, it's straight up over the top stuff. We knew that going in, but I'd rank it 8.5 out of 10 at least. It has high rewatchability (if that's a word) power. You'll be rolling the entire time. Of course they're running around naked, but you knew that going in too, so that's part of the territory. Spank loved the movie, but his conclusions was, "Too much cock" in the movie. That cracked me up.



During that movie, I left after part of the Notre Dame game at Michigan State. They were getting trounced hardcore. But when I get home that night, they end up winning 40-37. Who would've guessed? Now they're 3-1 with finally a softer spot in the schedule. Purdue, Stanford, and UCLA are up on the schedule as the next slate, all 3 games in South Bend, hopefully that helps the cause. Only 3 more road games all year, the last of those being in the mean streets of USC.

Speaking of college football, here's one for the fans: Garrett Wolfe. Yep, you all know him, but it's time to give some respect. Runningback of Northern Illinois and this kid means some serious business. He doesn't get looked at because of who he plays for, but check out his stats. They actually play a few good teams a year, so he's even done it against big talent. He's a walking video game, yet most of the average fans don't have a clue about the guy, sad. Do some research people.



Another late weekend me for in this last one. On Friday night, my idiot self was up till 7:30 AM online. Like I've always said, I'd be doing the same things online at 10:00 in the morning or whatever that I would be if I stayed up all night. I wake up early all week, so I stay up big usually on weekends. My sleep schedule is all kinds of whacked out, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Oh my.. fantasy NBA season is here! This is pretty much what I live for. On Thursday, I have a draft with the #basketball crew. We're doing a test run on NBA.com's new system and it seems to be pretty sweet. We have 14 guys in this league with 2 divisions. It's USA vs Canada is how we set it up. Then on October 22nd, it's the real deal Holyfield, the EDDFL. Yep, that's my local money league. 11 guys in the league this year and words can't describe how excited I am about that. Then my last league, October 29th, is the #basketball cup, A#BL. 20 members in this league, a keeper league, VERY competitive. Football can now take a back seat, NBA is in my eyesight!

Tuesday, I was getting my teach on. I was out in the hall talking to a buddy about our fantasy football teams. Up walks this chick teacher. She jumps right in the converation and actually holds her own with fantasy football. I'm not meaning that she knows what city a certain team is from. I'm talking legit, stuff you don't see too often from chicks in general. I'm not talking about every chick, but you don't see many that are hardcore fantasy fans to where she's spitting out stats and knew how many points John Kasay put up this week (who the average fan doesn't even have a clue who he is), was updated on injured players, she won 2 leagues last year, and things of the like. It impressed me just because.



You believe I still have poison ivy and it's spreading more and more? That's never good times right there. It's behind both knees and that's a killer spot. It's also on one of my thumbs, down my legs, and a few spots on my arms. It hasn't gotten anywhere too crazy yet, so I'm good for now on that. I still may have to run to the doctor to get some medicine in me though.

By the time the next blog comes out, it'll be October more than likely. That's some wild stuff there, you know how it goes. Also, if anyone out there reading wants to drop in a few paragraphs with some stories or whatever you want to talk about, hit me up and I'll see what I can do just to switch things up in here. I'll put it in the blog if it the staff deems it worthy.

Just a few new CDs to talk about..



Bone Thugs-N-Harmony: Thug Stories. I liked this one, but it doesn't have much of the edge that old school Bone had. It doesn't have the hard hitting fast lyrics as often as you'd want. They pimp it up more on this CD, but I still liked the vibe. One big thing for me was that Wishbone got to be featured a lot and he's usually one that is in the shadow of the group, yet he's my favorite of the bunch.

Chingy: Hoodstar. This is a feel good CD. I like Chingy, he stays true to his style. It's what me and my buddies like to call "happy rap". He's not out there to show how much of a thug he is or anything like that. It's not mean rap, but I can handle it since he puts in a pimp flow to it. Three 6, JD, and Mannie Fresh on this thing. Pullin' Me Back is the first single off this song that everyone has heard so far.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/lastaciasbody



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Another Cleveland trip planned. This time, it's October 6th. Yep, more Ring of Honor Wrestling with a stacked card. I can't wait. 2nd row tickets, here I come. Survival of the Fittest 2006!

2. Just when you thought Terrell Owens was on TV too often before, you haven't seen anything yet.

3. Let's go with some birthdays, shall we? Thursday, September 28th: Baseball manager Lou Piniella hits 63, geez. Jeffrey Jones (Ed Rooney, the principal on Ferris Bueller's Day Off) turns 59. NFL Hall of Famer Steve Largent, he's celebrating his 52nd. Former NFL wideout Irving Fryar goes for 44. Janeane Garofalo of SNL fame is now 42. Another underrated NFL wideoout, Jake Reed, he's 39. Mira Sirvino, Happy 36th. Swimmer Janet Evans is partying for her 35th. Hilary Duff is now 19, quality stuff right there. Also, on Sunday, I'd like to send a happy one to Susie (and blog commenter) up in PA, Happy Birthday! I'll leave your age out of this one, hah.

In A Coma, But I'm Back

Yes, I know. I've been in a coma. I haven't posted in a long time and people are starting to get on me. With that in mind, I better see what I can do for the readers out there.



What's happening people? It's been over a week since we last chatted, so I'm due to bring the goodies in this post hopefully. First thing, everyone is wanting to know my thoughts on the Notre Dame loss to hated Michigan. I'm typing this up a few hours after the game ended and things aren't pretty. That's the one game each year that I want to win more than any other in college football and my boys fell short in a major way. Props to Fortney, Barney, and the boys who are Michigan supporters. Sure, I could talk trash, but what's that going to prove? I don't like going that route anyways. My guys got burnt on passes and our secondary needs work. We dropped passes since we were afraid that Michigan was going to mangle us on a tackle, the line didn't hold up, and we had way too many penalties. Not a lot I can say. I'll just have to hear crap from WVU fans over it for a long time. I haven't hung myself yet, so that's the good news. I'll hold off on my WVU criticism right now, but you know where I stand on that anyways.. Onto other things..

When I say this week has been noneventful, I mean it. So I might have to reach all over the place for stories this time. Still, this post is being requested by some to get out as soon as possible. That means me and my staff are hard at work typing away for your enjoyment.



I was getting my shave on earlier and it made me think. I was bored a month or so ago and figured I'd buy some old school shaving "cream" instead of the gel. One thing I noticed is that I can buy that stuff for half the price of the gel and it lasts three times longer. And you can't go wrong with the fun factor. Something about how that works and you get the stuff going, some entertainment. Then again, weird things like that interest me. There's your shopping tip of the day, buy the old school stuff and you get to use it much longer. Don't say I didn't give you some advice today. Free of charge, as usual.

Speaking of cheap little things at the store. One of the best inventions ever is the hand sanitizer germ soap. It's nothing new, but if you're a neat freak like me, you need some of this stuff at your desk at all times. Quick and easy and you don't even have to wipe your hands off. Yeah, like I said, dumb things like that I get excited about. Right now I'm going with some classic Germ-X. http://www.germx.com.



I got to play gym teacher the other day. The kids were having volleyball tourneys all week, so that was interesting. I had 6th, 7th, and 8th grades throughout the day. Anyways, the 8th graders have a little talent and they don't embarrass themselves too much. The younger kids are entertainment. The 6th graders are so bad that they have to play a game called "towelball". Heard of that one? It was new to me anyways. How this concept works is you get a buddy and a towel. One holds one side of the towel, the other on the opposite end. You serve out of the towel and the other team tries to catch it in their towel instead of to volley it. So just think of like 12 or so kids on a team with these towels running around like Cornholio. They even can let it bounce on the ground once before it is played and it's still brutal. Funny though for sure. Meanwhile, as a part of the day, I got to shoot basketball and get paid for it. That my friends, is about as good as it gets.

Another easy one at my old high school today. I was supposed to be the driver education teacher, but since that guy was scheduled to drive with the kids today, I just got to hang out. So here's what I did. From 7:45-8:15, I had about 15 homeroom kids and we watched an assembly on the Homecoming Court and then they voted. After that, I had until 1:20 until my actual class. Yep, that's right, I had one class today. It wasn't much of a "class" though as it's one called Team Sports, so what my guys did was play some ball in the gym. I have it rough. Not many of this crew had talent, but still it was fun to watch the battles.



Anyone been keeping up with UFC's Ultimate Fighter as of late on Spike TV? Great season so far, but mainly for one reason. That is Shonie Carter. He absolutely makes that show. He's a punk, but he's entertaining at least. To me, he's one funny cat. This weekend we get a pretty good pay per view showdown. It's Matt Hughes and his 170lb title taking on BJ Penn who has beaten him before. I'm going with Hughes in this one though. Georges St. Pierre was supposed to fight Hughes at this show, but he got hurt, so Penn is the man in his place. Hughes is a bad man, but I look for Diego Sanchez to take him out in due time in that division.

It's time for the latest batch of CDs to add to my collection..



Clipse: The Hustler's Manual (Best Of). As I've said before, Clipse is the best live rap act I've seen in person. I've always been a fan of their stuff, so I had to get this one. Great music here for those who haven't heard much Clipse action.

Daz: So So Gangsta. Daz is back with this bad boy. As he's with JD now, the beats are excellent, but that doesn't take away from him still doing gangsta rap. I was worried about that at first when he joined So So Def, but no worries anymore. A short CD, but one that is very good.

Dem Hoodstarz: Band Aide & Scoot. This is a Bay Area group that I don't know much about to be honest. That's how I am with some of these CDs. Just try it out and see what happens. Plus, it's Bay Area rap, so of course I'm interested. I haven't listened yet to give this any kind of grade though.

Lupe Fiasco: Food & Liquor. This kid is the real deal. A Chicago rapper who is real smooth with his raps and he tells a story. You don't get many storyteller rappers these days as it's mostly watered down junk. Not Lupe though, be on the lookout.

Hillside Stranglaz: Celly Cel Presents Bad Influence. I got this one just based on Celly Cel being involved. He's a legend in the Bay, so it shouldn't be bad at all if the CD has his blessing on it.

JT The Bigga Figga: Drop Your Thangs (Just Box). Guess what, another guy from the Bay. It seems like JT has a new CD every month, he's not messing around in the studio.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/865388



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Getting poison ivy isn't one of the coolest things there is. Hopefully it doesn't spread on me. So far it hasn't, but I usually get it bad. I'll keep everyone updated. I know you're on the edge of your seats waiting on that.

2. I typed a lot of this up early in the week, so I'll just keep Monday's days up here.. Birthdays for Monday, September 18th: Pimp music singer Frankie Avalon is 66. Rocker Lita Ford goes for 48, dang. Baseballer Ryne Sandberg hits 47. Tony Soprano is 45. Actress Holly Robinson is celebrating her 42nd. I'm feeling old. Ricky Bell of Bell Biv Devoe fame, Happy 39th to you. Recently retired NBA baller Toni Kukoc is partying for his 38th. Lance Armstrong and his drug infested body is 35. Jada Pinkett Smith is also 35. That's a big list.

3. The snack as I type this up? Cheez-Its, green olives, and provolone cheese to go with peach tea. Now you're crazy if you think that doesn't rock.

27 Hours of Action

I like it when I have some different stories to write in here. I should have a nice selection this week to pick from. First off, it's always interesting when some random person I haven't talked to in ages sees me and mentions something about my blog. That cracks me up for reason. I also like how I'm just rambling along, everything is true, but I'm never doing anything too out of the ordinary and people think Shinnston is booming. However, whatever I write, some people take it for granted and it can ruin their day if they read something here they don't like. Just be laid back people. If you don't like it, don't read it, but you know you can't stay away. Again, you know how I am. If something is on my mind, I'm going to say it. That's the fun about it.



Movie time on Tuesday. I rolled to Fairmont with my boys Cork and Spank to watch Crank. I'm a huge Jason Statham fan as his work in both the Transporter movies have me hooked. There were 5 people in the theather counting our crew, you can't beat that. Also, Fairmont is my favorite place to go for a movie. $6 to get in, they sell Gatorade, and they have rocking old school seats. What else can a guy ask for other than some dirty chick bouncing around in there at the same time? We didn't get a dirty chick, but some days you can't get everything in your favor. Go see this movie, it's straight action the entire way with no dead spots. It also has some spots that are downright hilarious and that surprised me. Amy Smart isn't looking bad in this one at all. She reminds me of a regular chick, something you could actually see in real life instead of some uber celebrity who has all fake parts and gets airbrushed.

I'm going to bounce around with my week here, just to keep everyone on their toes. I'm moving along to Friday night where there was some good times to be had for all. I wake up that day at 5:45 AM for work. I come home around 3:30. I get online for a bit and then me and Spank get some Chinese while sitting around the house playing Madden and watching BET. It doesn't get much more relaxed than that. I'm in my own little world up here in my part of the house. On the Madden scene, we were bored and used a few teams from NFL Europe just for the fun of it. How'd that go? These teams are crazy slow, the QBs can't throw their patterns, and it's a mess. It's worth checking out though, just because it's teams rated low, so you have to really work for your yardage.. Then we move to later in the night..



Our crew was due to go out and eat. Ozzie, Matt, Kari, Spank, Sweet Pea, Fortney, Abbey, Sarah Stru, Sarah Stru's dude, Stevie Buck, Sims, and myself were along for the festivities. We ended up going to Outback. I'm not into Outback as much as everyone else and their brother, but I'll eat anywhere, I'm not picky. We had two round tables for the action. At my table it was Buck, Spank, Sweet Pea, Sims, Ozzie, and myself. We were joking how our table was the outcast, mostly single guys, and were loud all night as you just say what's on your mind. Our waitress was a total mess. She actually told us they were out of sweet tea and to be easy on the amount she gave us. You serious now? This set us off, but being that I always tip nice like an idiot, I still give her a nice tip at the end of the night. Go figure. I ended up getting the boomerang shrimp meal. $16 or something it was for that and a thing of fries, I thought it was expensive compared to most other places similar to that. Sweet Pea got like 3 bites worth of pasta and chicken for like $13, crazy. Good eating though.

After that, we roll to Fortney's house to get our gaming on. How's that? Everyone but Buck and Sims goes back to Shinnston for that. From around 11:30-3:00, we battled in 90s style Trivial Pursuit. Count me in for games like that at any time as there's trash talking going on and just people being idiots. We had three teams and I was paired up with Spank, Abbey, and Sarah Stru. Sarah's dude didn't seem to have a clue that we just act like a bunch of idiots. I think dude said 2 words all night, so I guess he's a good guy, but I can't tell you one thing about him. I can get along with anyone though, so he gets the benefit of the doubt, but I didn't even get the guy's name. Is it Pedro? Osama? Billy Jack? Chuck Norris? Who knows. These and many other unanswered questions in Shinnston, gotta love it. Big shout outs to Fortney and Abbey for letting our crew hang there, even if we probably stayed too long I'm sure.



I had to roll out a bit before 3:00. Everyone else was leaving since they were falling asleep, but I was just starting the night. I went to the chapel (the locals will know what I mean there) from 3:00-4:00 AM for Sarah Stru's Dad. Then I get home and I'm online till 8:45 AM. Not bad. 27 hours straight I was up, feeling good when I went to bed, but I needed a little sleep before the Notre Dame game at 3:30. Yep, I'm an idiot I know. I'm too addicted to being online, but I'm a machine when it comes to staying up late for whatever that's worth.

Last Sunday was another big thing for the crew. We had the first annual Shinnston Fantasy League, our NFL money league draft at Sweet Pea's house. Who all is in the league? Sweet Pea (The Commish), Ozzie, Matt, Maul, Bart, Salentro, Pill, Fortney, Jimmy Mills, and myself. It doesn't get better than having a live fantasy draft. Not even some chick could top that action and I'm being serious. Don't get me wrong there, but you can always find that in Shinnston if you want, but you can't always have a live fantasy draft. I got the 7th pick and drafted Edgerrin James as my franchise. Here's my team:



QB: Tom Brady: NE
Chris Simms: TB
Joey Harrington: MIA

RB: Edgerrin James: ARI
Reggie Bush: NO
Julius Jones: DAL
Kevan Barlow: NYJ

WR: Joe Horn: NO
Michael Jenkins: ATL
Troy Williamson: MIN
Antonio Bryant: SF
Marty Booker: MIA

TE: Todd Heap: BAL
Vernon Davis: SF

K: Neil Rackers: ARI
Nate Kaeding: SD

D: Washington
Cleveland

In a short wrestling note: The latest Wrestling Observer Newsletter came out with it's biggest issue of the year, the Hall of Fame edition. I won't explain this to the non-wrestling fans, so I'll make it quick. Five new members were added to the HOF this year. They are Eddie Guerrero, Paul Bowser (promoter of Boston in the 30s), Hiroshi Hase, Masakatsu Funaki, and Aja Kong. Meltzer started his HOF in 1996.



Since a lot reading always tell me they like the dirty thug ho chicks and things of the like, I'll let my boys Corndog and The_Freak help me out in this next section. First, thanks to The_Freak for finding this next pic. It has me rolling, well, just because. You know it's funny when you see it too, just admit it. And that pic doesn't seem too far fetched because we know anything can and will happen online, even someone getting punished as Ozzie would famously say. After the pic, I'm pasting a thing Corndog said about his MySpace adventures the other day. He always has something interesting to say and this one had me laughing. I'm easy to make laugh though, but still:



Corndog says:

So im just lookin around on myspace a lil bit tonight/this morning..just checkin out friends of friends, and im lookin at this girls page, who is from around williamson for the wv people.
so im checkin out this girls pictures and picture comments and BAM! right there is a picture comment from the one and only Bird33.
I had the feeling that he was an internet legend, and that proves it.

Pick a random girl on myspace and birdman is probably talking to her online at that very moment!

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/jaclynhall



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Notre Dame with a huge win this week against Penn State. What I liked was that my boys stepped up against PSU's supposed mean defense. It was 3-0 after the 1st quarter and I was expecting it to stay low scoring. However, the ND offense came to life and rolled.

2. Beach Bum Boxing: A great 10 minute clip that you'll enjoy. These bums fight for a bottle of Jim Beam: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6XYQpXIwEE

3. Just got some info through MySpace of all places, relayed through Wes and then to Klem. I'll paste the big happenings, congrats Clark and Carrie! "From Wes:
OUR friend Mr. Clark Riley and his wife Carrie gave birth today to a healthy baby girl. I was wanting to let everyone on here that might know Clark and has not received a phone call that it was a baby girl. 6lbs 10oz 20" Miss Peyton Elizabeth Riley! Congratulations Clark and Carrie........."

Party Like Rockstars On Labor Day

What's up since the last time we chatted? Things are going just fine here. I'll do my best to get my latest stories out to you as I normally do. Labor Day Weekend huh? Hopefully everyone has been rocking it out and living it up. With that in mind, nothing changes here, but since it's a holiday weekend, I might as well hype it up.



So I'm back to work and waking up early. The kids started last week, but I already got 3 days of work in. Crazy that teachers are already taking days off. I can't complain though, that's more work for me. Last year I lucked out and landed a long term sub job. This year I'm back to roaming all over the county, but that's fine by me. Less responsibility that way and I'm more of a glorified babysitter. No lesson plans to turn in and that makes things easier. This year, I have my Nintendo DS Lite in my bag and that makes my planning periods much better. Yes, I realize I'm double some of these kids' age and still am not afraid to pimp the DS. If it's good, it's good, no matter the age. It's a great handheld system.

I didn't make it to the Tally Rally this year, but Shinnston made their name up there like they do every year. Dad was talked into getting in the morra tourney this year. He was part of the winning team in the first year of the rally, 1979. I don't think he's been since then. Anyways, he teamed up with Sorine, Rocco, and Zuccio. They made it to the Finals, which meant they were on the big stage and got announced. That's funny in itself. They took on another Shinnston team that featured Mickey Tate, Frankie Tate, Albert Tate, and Matt Fleece, who ended up winning. No fights this year between Shinnston and Clarksburg surprisingly, but Dad said it was rowdy. Cops were in full effect once they knew Shinnston was running things on Friday night. Of course, our guys eat that up every year for some reason, which cracks me up. The average festival attendee probably doesn't know what to think when they're watching the morra tourney and most of the teams are wasted and just screaming and yelling at each other. It's some quality entertainment, trust me.



More festival talk. On Saturday, I hit up the Jackson's Mill Jubilee. I was hooked on this one when I went last year. Most festivals are the same, but this one is a little different. I go for the food alone. You get some homemade stuff that is awesome. I loaded up on a tally sausage sandwich, frittis (fried dough for those who don't know that), and homemade ice cream. It's got the old school vibe there of how they make food and make other things if anyone is into that. And another weird but fun thing is that you get to ride a tractor into the grounds. Yes, only in WV, but you gotta admit you're interested now.

Last Sunday I had my college fantasy football draft. It's the only one of it's kind in my area that I'm aware of anyways. I'm sure others are out there, but I never hear of people being in a fantasy NCAA league, yet we have our keeper league going well. I'm the returning champ of this league, so I have to come strong this year. I have an insane running back crew and also have arguably the best two kickers in the nation. Here's my roster for those interested:



QB: Omar Haugabook, Troy
QB: Josh Padrick, Florida International
QB: Kevin Kolb, Houston
QB: Jeff Rowe, Nevada
QB: John Stocco, Wisconsin
RB: Ray Rice, Rutgers
RB: Darius Walker, Notre Dame
RB: Garrett Wolfe, Northern Illinois
RB: Ryan Bohm, Utah State
WR: Ryan Grice-Mullen, Hawaii
WR: Vincent Marshall, Houston
WR: Michael Thomas, Arizona
WR: Levi Dejohnette, Arkansas State
K: Mason Crosby, Colorado
K: Sam Swank, Wake Forest
--
QB: Sam Kellar, Nebraska (Inactive - Transfer)

College football season is now underway. Saturday was a loaded up day. For me, my Irish squeaked by Georgia Tech. The first half was definitely ugly. But they were able to shut GTech down in the second half if that means anything. It took us a while to get the run game going, but once that happened, we had the momentum. Big Cal Johnson is a beast for GTech though, the best WR in the nation. They need to get him the ball more. Next week it's Penn State, should be a great one. I wasn't too far off in my Marshall/WVU prediction. The final was 42-10 and I said 42-0. I'll refrain from bashing WVU's schedule this week, but if they can't steamroll through these teams all season long, something is wrong.



It's time for new CDs I got in the past week..

Loon: No Friends. This is Loon's first solo project after leaving Bad Boy on terms that weren't so great. He's pretty outspoken in this one if you're interested in his thoughts. Underrated.

Masta Killa: Made In Brooklyn. You can't go wrong with some Wu Tang action. Lyrically, Masta Killa straight up gets it done. He doesn't get the attention that a lot of the other members get, but he's legit. Pick up his stuff, you'll like it if you want some good NYC rap.

Method Man: 4:21... The Day After. Back-to-back Wu Tang CDs. I really liked this one a lot. Some good appearances on this CD too. RZA, Raekwon, Inspectah Deck, Fat Joe, Styles P, Ginuwine, Redman of course, and ODB getting some cuts laid in there. Mef rips into people who said he was getting too mainstream.

Outkast: Idlewild. Here's my deal with Outkast currently. Big Boi doesn't mess around, he keeps his style true to what he's always done. He has some real good raps throughout this CD. Andre though, what's going on with him? He's all whacked out now and seems to be more of a guy that wants to sing instead of rap. Snoop, Birdman, Lil Wayne, Sleepy Brown, Killer Mike, and a few others on this. You get some weird tracks since it's based on the movie, but the ones that are good on this thing are worth checking out.

The Roots: Game Theory. This Philly rap group has been around for a while. They have a style all to their own. Their lyrics are usually right on, but it's more of an intellectual rap that mixes in some old school hip hop style. It's not a must have, but if you're into that style of rap, you'll like it.



Too $hort: Blow The Whistle. The pioneer of pimpin' rap. Over 20 years in the game and he put the Bay Area on the map. He has the same style as he did when he first started, so you have to respect that. You can't go wrong with this one. A true legend.

Young Dro: Best Thang Smokin'. From the Dirty Dirty in Bankhead, this is T.I.'s protege. He's been around since the 90s, but finally got signed to a big label recently with T.I. As he would say, "I can shoulder lean, I dunno how to dance though."

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/somayareece

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's go with birthdays for Monday, September 4th: A hot day for golfers as Ray Floyd is 64 and Tom Watson goes for 57. Damon Wayans turns 46. Mike Piazza turns 38. Marvin Gaye's daughter Nona hits 32. It's a day early, but September 5th is none other than Clark Riley's birthday, so be sure to wish him a happy one!

2. The Taster with Redman jamming in the background. These guys are talented: http://youtube.com/watch?v=ksoGda_Z6Bs

3. 52 degrees tonight. Finally, we're getting out of the hot weather. Bring on the snow!

Circus Sideshow Freaks

It's been a week and I have quite of few interesting topics to mention to the legions of fans out there who read my stuff. I guess it shows that you all are just as bored as me while reading this, so I'll keep pimping it out as usual. In this edition you get stories such as this dude with two parts that most guys only have one of, a fishing trip with Spank, Thursday night ball gone wrong and a shoutout to Shinnston to stop being lazy, video game battles at Posey's, and the Wallace Softball Invitational. Let's get things underway and quit messing around..



An excellent, yet messed up story, I read that was posted from my buddy TyLaw in Lobstah (http://lobsterrodeo.com/balls). Check this out, it's like nothing you've read before:

Are you SURE you want to remove that?
Sat Aug 19, 10:10 AM

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - An Indian businessman born with two penises wants one of them removed surgically as he wants to marry and lead a normal sexual life, a newspaper report said Saturday.

The 24-year-old man from the northern state of Uttar Pradesh admitted himself to a New Delhi hospital this week with an extremely rare medical condition called penile duplication or diphallus, the Times of India said.

"Two fully functional penes is unheard of even in medical literature. In the more common form of diphallus, one organ is rudimentary," the newspaper quoted a surgeon as saying.

I'll just leave it as it is. There isn't a lot more I can add to that story to make it even more freaky. It's like something you'd see in a movie, who has that? 24 years old and he's just now wanting to do something about it? Be in porn or something. A circus sideshow? You're a freak of nature, I'm sure you could make some kind of money having two at once, as mangled as they probably look. What throws me off is that it says "two fully functional". Yep, I'm think the same questions everyone else is, but I'll keep that to myself right now.



Wednesday was a fishing trip with Spank. I start the festivities by picking him up on the West Side at 7:30 AM. We go to Quiet Dell to get minnows, but they were out. We had to wait till 9:30 till the minnow dude came, so we went to the Nutter Fort McDonald's to kill time. Easily one of the worst all time breakfasts I've had in my life. We both took about two bites of our stuff and rolled out. Bad times. But we go back, get our minnows, and head to Stonewall Jackson Lake to set up shop. We finally start fishing at 11:00. We were there for 6 hours, getting out of there at 5:00. We walked a half mile down this trail with our hands full with poles, coolers, chairs, and whatever else we needed.

I figured it had to be a good fishing trip if I brought along some chew. It adds to the whole WV redneck thing. I never got into snuff, but chew I don't mind. I haven't tried it in about 6 or 7 years though, so I was due out of boredom. Red Man Golden Blend. Good times right there. I won't do it hardly ever though since I like my teeth to be pimped out, so I bust it out on the rare occassions. I forgot how dizzy that stuff gets me, it was like I was buzzing from a drink or something if I ever knew how that felt. I always prided myself on the straight edge stuff. Not the punk rock and whole deal, but with drugs and alcohol anyways. I never drink and haven't ever used an illegal drug in my life (weed, pills, etc). Never been drunk, I didn't even drink on my 21st birthday way back when. It's just not for me. Believe what you want on that stuff.



Oh yeah, fishing. I got sidetracked. I didn't get a bite all day at Stonewall, it was rough. Spank got two nice catfish though and we got pics of those. Overall, at Stonewall, it was an uneventful day as far as getting bites go. We go to Weston to eat on the way home. Weston surprised both of us. Been a while since I've been there, but it's no joke for a small town. They got a bunch of things there for that little place. But you can't go wrong with a fishing trip just to be idiots all day and get out of town. We then come home to the East Side and go to Anderson's Pond. We got more action at the pond in one hour than we did all day at Stonewall. We caught some nice bass there.

Thursday night for ball was the worst night ever. That's always our ball night at The Lighthouse. Guess how many people we got this week? 4. Yep, that's it. We called everyone we could think of to play and still nothing. It got to the point we were calling up little high school kids to come and play, but even they had stuff going on. So if you're a local baller and reading this, we need you to show up next week to get some ball in. My town is a pile of garbage for people being lazy bums. You can't get off your couch for 2 hours to play some ball? Ridiculous. I'm not calling anyone out in particular. I'll call out the whole town. Show up to play some ball, get some exercise in ya, it won't hurt, I promise. Weird how we had like 20 guys a few months ago in there and now everyone is missing in action.



Friday night it was video game action at my boy Posey's. We played NCAA 2007 on PS2 and Madden 2007 on GameCube there. Spank owned us as he straight messes cats up in those games. I'm able to hang in Madden though, but I've never seen anyone better in NCAA than he is. We played from 7:00-12:00 and you can't go wrong with that. Nolan stopped up to see the madness, but didn't play. The only downfall to the night? Posey's dog does not shut up. Me and Spank were ready to give it the Chickenwing and make it tap out. But the video game extravaganza overrides that. Also, Posey introduced us to some new chips that I haven't tried. Maybe you have, but if not, check out Lay's KC Masterpiece Hot 'n Spicy chips or Fiery Habenero Doritos.

Saturday rolls around and it's the annual Wallace Invitational Softball Game. This is Cork's reunion crew and I've been going for the past 5 years or so probably. A great time and the night always ends with some good home cooking. My team ended up getting beat, but it was fun nonetheless. I didn't have the game I wanted to play, but I still did ok. My batting was rough today, but I went 2-4. My outs were a line drive shot straight to the pitcher and another I hit to the second baseman and he gunned me. My hits were an infield hit that I legged out Ichiro style and one to the leftfield gap. I just couldn't get anything up in the air too deep though. I played left/center in the field as I like to run around with the speed and try to make some nice plays. I didn't get a chance to dive or anything today, but still always hold my own in the field.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/therealravenriley



3 Quick Thangs:

1. To the gum fans out there.. and I'm sure I've posted this sometime over the years.. but does it get much better than Bubble Tape? Of course not. http://www.bubbletape.com.

2. Birthdays for Sunday, August 27th you want? That's what I'll give you. Pee-Wee Herman goes for 54. Downtown Julie Brown is 45. Jim Thome hits 36. That's not much of a list, but that's all the staff deems worthy. Monday though, my Dad becomes another year older. Yep, Dude turns 57, he's getting up there. Props to him on that one.

3. I'm back on the Ramen noodles kick. Quick and easy eating.