Friday, February 29, 2008

"Cause I'm A Ruthless Villain.."

February is in the books and the people are getting restless. Restless for what, I'm not quite sure yet, but we have them stirring either way. This edition will feature the following: Fruit farmers wizzing on their pickings, getting shot in the butt, hot nurses, Harry Potter is a gangster, Idol, and a lot of new CDs. And of course that's not all, it's just your quick preview to get the feet wet. Now it's time to dive in..

I've been on a big fruit kick of as late. I've always hit up a lot of fruit, but even more than usual the past month or so. I was in the kitchen hanging out on Thursday and eating some green grapes. I opened the package up and started tearing into them. My parents are big on washing the fruit off before eating it. It makes sense and most people would probably do that. Dad was saying how the fruit pickers are out there on the farms just wizzing onto the stuff we eat and we should wash it off. That cracked me up. Besides, it gets sprayed down enough over the time it gets to the store and the stores always spray it down too.

Last week I was due to get some new DVDs. I'm wondering if this next combination has been done before. I like my chances of no on this one. So what did I buy? Last Tuesday was when American Gangster came out, so I had to get that masterpiece. Again, if you haven't seen this movie yet, all hope may not be lost, because you can get it now. I've hyped it up enough in here, that's for sure. To go with that, I also bought the first two Harry Potter DVDs. The guy checking me out probably didn't know what type of person I was. As we say in the blog, I kept him on his feet and had him thinking all night on that one I'm sure. You get a kiddie movie mixed in with a movie blowing off heads and throwing f-bombs every 2.3 seconds, thumbs up from me.

Speaking of Harry, what'd I think? I realize I'm way behind everyone else on this series, but at least I'm still getting it. As far as the book goes, in Harry 7, I'm fairly close to wiping out that boy. Just about 100 more pages and I'm good as gold. With the movies, after reading the books, I didn't have high hopes. Most of your movies can't come anywhere even near what the actual book was like. However, I was definitely surprised by the Harry 1 DVD, it delivered. I've heard other people say the movies aren't that good, but after the first one, it's starting out very nice.

With March here, it's time to get pumped for fantasy baseball. I'm in two big leagues this year and they are both going to be competitive. I'm not in a money league for baseball, but ironically our free leagues are so tight that it's just as good. Unfortunately, in my area, it's tough to get a hardcore group of baseball fans that would stick with it. We have a handful, but that's about it who are true baseball guys. Then again, I'm a weird one that likes baseball much better than football, where everyone else seems to bow down to everything associated with football. I like football, but you know. And as everyone knows, basketball is by far my #1 sport to both follow and play. Anyways, I have 2 upcoming drafts.

One is a newly created league, League Freak with the commish being The_Freak as you would guess. It is a 14-man league and we draft on March 8th. Not many care, but I'm still going to list the people involved in this one. We have The_Freak, TheAnswer, Uncle Wilbur, Posey, Cork, MrsAnswer, Bono, Duce, Neon, ManDingo, Duce's Bro, myself, and 2 boys of The_Freak's. This one starts from scratch and isn't a keeper league, so that'll be fun for something different.

The other? It's the infamous American Baseball League (A#BL). This is ran from the blog's video producer, Kasher himself. This one features a whopping 18 people and it's a keeper league in existence since 2003. Both of these leagues have a lot of overlap, but once again, we'll break down who is part of this extravaganza: Kasher, DerekHood, Cork, Trev, Walz, ManDingo, TyLaw, Neon, Duce, Dack, Kris3, Dom, TMac, Blahah, Uncle Wilbur, Big Play Ray, Big Arlo, and myself. It's not even March and we're around 200 posts on our message board already, we get it done. In our basketball league, the A#BA, we have over 1500 posts from the season. No other Yahoo leagues can compete with us, I dare them to. My five keepers this year are Johan Santana, David Wright, Prince Fielder, Brandon Phillips, and Matt Kemp. The first four of those I feel are true absolute studs, so I'm ready to rock out a good draft on March 16th.

I'm recovered from my sickness of last week. Part of those was from my kids practically throwing up on me at work and the other half was getting a few hours of sleep a night I'm sure. I roll to the doctor on Friday after work since I was a zombie that day. Two good things while I was there. One is that I didn't have to wait at all, that's rare. Two, the nurses were hotties this time, how can you go wrong with that? I go in to get my blood pressure checked and all of that. Not one, but two nurses they send in to do that tough job, hah. I didn't mind though, half sick or not, that doesn't hurt things to look at some filthies. Then the doc was in for about 2.3 seconds and asked if I wanted a shot or just medicine instead. I asked what he recommended and he said the shot works instantly. I said, sign me up. Shots don't bother me at all like some people. I remember one time getting a poison ivy shot and this dumb chick broke the needle off in me. I just sat there and looked as stuff was shooting everywhere and she freaked. And you think I'm making this stuff up, but I'm not. This time,a third nurse comes, who also looks good, and does the honor of giving me a shot in the butt. She was instantly drawn to the Italian machismo oozing out of me as she gave that shot. Well, I'd like to think that anyways. Whatever it takes to get better.

We're now booting people on Idol left and right. This week, we booted 4 more, 2 dudes and 2 chicks. At the moment, I'm still rooting for Chikezie and my girl Asia'h. Who I really think has a shot to win on each side? I'm going with Aussie Boy on the dudes and Tattoo Chick on the chicks. Kid David has the chicks going wild though and makes Paula cry, so he should go far as well. The girls on Thursday, were way over the top drama queens, it was a mess. The Alaina girl that got booted, she broke down and said she wasn't gonna sing. Then she ended up singing, weird. I always like how the other contestants act like the world has ended when someone loses. Hey buddy, that helps you last at least another week, be happy. I'm sure they're friends, but there's only one winner and you have to be somewhat ruthless, Eazy-E style. Or as Eazy rightfully said in Ruthless Villain featuring MC Ren:

Cause I'm a ruthless villain,
Cold tearin' shit up,
Don't come on my face,
Pumpin' no kind of junk,
Eazy-E's in control,
And if you press your luck,
I'll smoke you like that,
And won't give a fuck.

I haven't put any old rap lyrics in here in a good while, so it was time. That leads us into newer things. We're due for some more CD updates. We're going all rap in this one, just bringing it with all sorts.

B.G. & The Chopper City Boyz: We Got This. This is mainly BG's boys doing the work, but he's in some of this as well. I'm big on the Louisiana style of rap anyways, so I wanted to pick it up. He's been under the radar lately, but I feel he's really good lyrically, one of the better ones of that bunch from the original Hot Boys.

Crucial Conflict: Planet Crucon. I've been waiting on Crucial to come out with something new for ages. They were one of my favorites in the mid 90s and this one showed why that is still true. For those who weren't around for their first run, load up on these guys from Chicago, very underrated. If you're into the quick raps with some added meanness, you can't go wrong here at all.

Jim Jones: Harlem's American Gangster. Stolen from Jay-Z's pull on the great movie mentioned above, Jim goes at Jay-Z a ton in this one. To me, and I like them, but all of the Dipset guys are the same. They don't distinguish from each other as much as they should. Not that it's bad, but it just seems like deja vu all over again.

Kool G Rap: Half A Klip. We're going with a legend here. You want some viciousness and straight street rap? This is what you're wanting to load up on for sure. Not a long CD, but it gets to the point and does its job, pick it up.

Pastor Troy: Attitude Adjuster. Troy is a guy you either love or hate. There's no in between. He's from the mean streets of the ATL, but doesn't do the club thing that so many other ATL guys do, so I'm down with him. He's gritty and goes at it, screaming half the time. Some can't get past his screaming, but it works in a mean way if you ask me. This one though, he impresses with more lyrical content. Songs to pick up from this CD? I'm Hot, Put Him On The Scope, and Dom would like to recommend For My Soldiers.

Sumthin Terrible: Turf Tested, Hood Approved. This is one of those times where I don't know the artists, but it's worth a try, what can it hurt? They're from Northern Cali, so of course I'm interested in rap from that area. The title sounded rough enough to see what it was all about. I haven't listened to this one yet except for a few tracks, but it seems worthy.

Young Gunz: Rapid Fire. I liked these guys a lot when Jay-Z brought them out a while back. They don't get a lot of love and I'm not even positive they're still with the Roc. They're now under Young Gunz Media as their label, so I'm not sure if that's a branch of the Roc or if they are on their own. Either way, the label isn't going to change my mind on these guys, they bring some talent and I liked this CD. Pretty crazy this is their fifth album and they're both only 23 years old. Yep, that makes me feel old.

Yukmouth: Million Dollar Mouthpiece. More Bay Area rap for the fans to feast on. If you go way back, Yuk was part of the Luniz. He's also a protege of my boy Dru Down, one of my all time picks. As an added bonus for me, Dru Down is on the track East Oakland. Devin The Dude and Crooked I also appear on this. Apparently this CD was 5 years in the making, did Yuk deliver as he usually does? He brings about the unique voice.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week:

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: We're now ready for Kasher's segment and this one is genius. It's disturbing and something you won't want to watch at work or around too many people however, but it's downright funny. If you're a SuperBad fan, you'll know McLovin and his character. He's part of this vid entitled The Teabag Incident:

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's start the month of March out right with our birthdays. Saturday, March 1st. Actor Alan Thicke of Growing Pains days, 61. Ron Howard, now director, but most know as Opie on The Andy Griffith Show, he's doing it for his 54th. Daisy Duke is also 54. NBA baller and a guy I always personally thank for my Heels winning the 1993 National Title, Chris Webber, Happy 35th. Zack of Saved By The Bell is now is 34. If that doesn't make my era feel old, I'm not sure what else will. We have a nice mix there, it's worthy of some mentions.

2. Here's today's weird stat: People who ride on roller coasters have a higher chance of having a blood clot in the brain. I guess I'm safe then from my brain exploding into 235 pieces.

3. I was driving home tonight and was behind this car at the stoplight. I'll end with the Potter kick since half the people reading hate that stuff, but I like it, so it's going in. I saw this bumper sticker that says "Republicans for Voldemort". Good stuff right there. I'm a Democrat and don't care one way or another if someone is Dem or Republican, that bumper sticker is creative. Has to be funny to the Potter fans. Also, thanks to Uncle Wilbur for the pics he sent on an email that we used this week.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Dodging Puke

How'd Valenine's Day treat the readers? Mine was the usual, more money in my pocket. Due to me rocking out the single life, there wasn't anyone that I had to spend on this year. I can handle that, less drama too. Now we have a big mix of nothing over the next month on the calendar. The rest of February surely doesn't have much. We're waiting around for March Madness and what else does March hold? Easter isn't until late March. We trek through the winter, with topics to pop up that we least expect.

Tuesday at work was interesting to say the least. By the time the day was over, my room was labeled the Hospital Ward. As a teacher, you're around sick little kids all the time. That's no biggie, right? You just deal with it and have a tolerance not to get sick from them in most cases. I don't have a lot of kids in my classes, but around my area, people are getting down with the sickness so to speak. First, I had this kid who had missed the past week for the flu and bronchitis. He shows up today and is a mess. He grinds through one subject and then has no energy left and starts to get sick again. The next is a kid that didn't look good as soon as he walked in. He was in a hurry and asked to go to the bathroom. A few minutes later, he's back and says he threw up all over the place. Then he runs back down there and it's out of both ends. Just what you wanted to know I'm sure, but it sets things up for our story.

The same kid is coughing, spitting up junk and waiting on a ride to come pick him up in an hour. So that means he'll hang in my room for an hour. He starts to lay down and then asks if he can borrow the garbage can. Great. So he goes into the corner and kind of hangs out, puking up his guts. Then he goes to the bathroom again and says a lot of it got on the floor, plus he needs a change of pants. You kidding me? Yep, that's where your tax dollars go to for the teachers. We dodge puke all day long. A third kid was medicated up fairly well and he was a zombie after a change of his usual pattern. So he was zonked for most of the day. I usually don't write many stories about work, but if I don't get sick from all of this, I'll be a machine.

Speaking of being a machine, it's time to revisit my sleeping schedule. I'll start from last week and lead up till earlier this week. Tuesday night, I roll to bed at 2:00 AM and wake up at 6:00 AM. Wednesday night, I go to bed at 2:00 and wake up at 6:00 again. Thursday night, I tap out at 2:30 and wake up at 6:00 again. So Friday I'd come home and get a big nap, right? Nope, for some reason I toughed it out. Due to that, I'd go to bed early, correct? Wrong again, I end up staying up all night and going to bed at 8:30 AM. The next day I sleep till 2:00, only 5½ hours, not what I wanted, but it happens. Saturday night, I roll to bed at 3:30 and wake up at 12:00 to play ball. Finally a decent night of sleep. Sunday night and I'm wanting to start the work week off with a normal bed time. What do I do? 3:00 AM and wake up at 6:00, doh. I come home and get a nap? No, I go workout and have a pretty good one. Monday night I go to bed at 12:30, not bad at all. Tuesday evening, I nap from 4:00-5:30. I'm ready to rock. You know the moral, I don't have to even say it.

I'm a big Idol fan, too big for most reading probably since most don't care. What I don't like is all of these 2 hour episodes. One a week may be ok, but not twice. Then on Thursday, we get an hour long results show. I can imagine how the average bum fans would tune out when the hardcores are thinking it's a bit much. With that, I may cut back on the Idol opinions for a few weeks and let the chopping block come to get rid of some of these bums of the Final 24. From last week, my boy Josiah, the kid who quit school and lives in his car, he gets cut. I thought that would've been a classic story to follow through the season, plus he had talent, but the judges didn't think he was good enough. After the first week that made the cuts to 24, at this point, who am I rooting for? This will change a zillion times, but on the guys side I'm pulling for the infamous Chikezie Eze. On the girls, I'm going with the hottie known as Asia'h. Now it's time for me to pick what 2 guys and 2 girls get booted on Thursday night: Jason Yeager, Luke Menard, Amy Davis, and Kady Malloy.

One thing Asia'h did did last week that I wasn't big on was her hair. This will be a separate topic all together. Rant time! I don't know much about hairstyles and what the actual terms are, but you'll know what I'm talking about. Let's take a chick with long hair first off (my #1 turn-on probably). Then she takes the front of her hair and just throws that junk up to the middle and she looks like a rooster. You take the bangs or all of the front and just shove it up into a pile of mess. I don't get it, you see TONS of chick rocking this horrible look out and you get the hair stuck up with all you see is an ugly forehead. But why? I'm a simple guy when it comes to chick hair, leave it down and preferably straight. That brings us to Corndog..

He brought up a good idea the other day while we were chatting around. He said I should interview random bums or people I know and just go with a new theme every now and then. I should probably try that when I'm out of ideas. Either way, since we're talking about hair, Corndog wants to give the world some of his wisdom and expertise: "If a a girl is gonna be annoying, she better be really good looking". That's pretty good words to live by if you ask me. That's all free of charge from Corndog himself, he's gonna have to start charging soon.

You want something quick and easy to kill time? Well, for sports fans anyways that have too much time on their hands online. That would be a site called Cyberdunk. This was brought to our attention from none other than Dom of #basketball fame, straight out of Germany. Who would've guessed that a dude in the middle of nowhere in Shinnston would have people in Germany reading this thing? Aside from Dom, I also get a lot of regular feedback from Kristen, a Florida transplant who is now in Germany. Small world out there. Ok, enough rambling. I'm not sure how long the craze can last, but it's going pretty strong with my crew. It is a MMORPG, a Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. Basically, you create your own basketball player. You choose what country he's from, position, and then go into a draft. You are then drafted by a country's division. After that, there's a lot of things to do to build your player up. You set him up with contracts, gear, skills on the court, and go after being the man. Give it a try if you're a sports fan, it's strangely addicting even though it sounds simple.

I haven't done a CD update in here in a good while. I've been slacking in getting some new songs to the collection, but we have a small one to mention by having two new ones:

Raheem DeVaughn: Love Behind The Melody. If you're into pimpin' R&B, this guy from Newark, New Jersey is definitely worthy of checking out. The song he has out now that you've heard would be Woman. iTunes had it as their #1 single of the week at the end of January for whatever that's worth. I haven't heard the whole CD yet, but what I have, it's not too shabby at all. I know it's a week after Valentine's Day, but the ladies will appreciate it. Once again, this advice is free of charge. Raheem received a Grammy nomination for this year.

Lupe Fiasco: The Cool. Maybe you didn't get his first CD when it came around, but now is your chance to pick up this one. This Chicago cat features some smooth lyrics and stays away from going at people or being negative. I classify him as happy rap as me and my boys would say. He's real good though and creative, hopefully he starts to make a bigger name. His song last year, Kick Push, was nominated at most of the awards shows. As I type this, his current single Superstar is on TV now as the #1 song on BET's 106 & Park.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week:

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: I went back to the Lobstah archive to dig this up. It's from 2005 and credit goes to our video producer, Kasher:

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try some birthdays for Friday, February 22nd. We start out with a basketball legend, Dr. J. He turns 58 on this day. I would've guessed a bit older. Golfer Vijay Singh, he's now 45. He's one of the best out there, but I always cracked up at his comparisons with Tiger. Get out of here, nobody can hold Tiger's jock. Former tennis stud little guy, Michael Chang, 36. It seems like he's been away for ages. How short a tennis career ends. Actress Drew Barrymore, 33, but has probably been through enough to be 80. I think she still looks real nice though. We'd also like to send the birthday wishes out to Cousin Ozzie, he's doing it big on the 23rd! Have a good one man!

2. Feeling all stuffed up? Here's one you'll have to try. I've probably mentioned it before in here, but I'm half sick at the moment (guess I'm not a machine like I was writing above) and don't remember. What you need to do is throw one of these bad boys into the shower with ya. It's a big tablet and it helps you breathe. I know, it sounds stupid, but it works. Shower Soothers:

3. It's time to brush up on your skills. This fact is a historical one. Australia accounts for 5.3% of the world's land mass. Who leads? Asia with a cool 30%.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Chikezie Eze from Inglewooood!

Last week I was under deep pressure to get the blog out on a certain date from MrsAnswer on her birthday. I delivered with that, so this week I had to come back to my senses. It's time to relax and just go with the flow. Now that it's nearing upon 2 weeks, I'm having the fans demand more. It was slack time and I need to get the ball rolling again. I've already heard from Corndog and Carolina that are fired up, dedicated readers, so I best get to typing out something good, it's what they want. See, that's just a reason to get some characters into the blog. JK Rowling has nothing on me, you know you want to find out more on such people as Corndog and Carolina, so stay tuned.

I'm going to start out with a good story from my boy Clark. His uncle just finished up his degree and he either is writing a book or this is part of a paper he had to write. Growing up, my Dad (everyone knows him as Dude if you were wondering when ya read this section) was older than Clark's uncle, but they were around the same group of buddies and neighborhood. Hot Sam is my uncle when you get to that part for the non-locals who don't know the crew. First off, it makes it easier to write the blogs when people give me ideas. Most times I can think of something, but every now and then, I go into a brain freeze. That's where Clark comes into the mix, so props to him on sharing this story:

Clark (7:12:21 PM): Not much ... I have a story for ya
Clark (7:12:57 PM): My Uncle Pat just finished up a college degree to become a librarian and he just sent my mom a Word file called Ch. 1
Clark (7:13:43 PM): I'm not sure if he is writing a book or if this was part of an assignment he had due, but he talks about the Mahlon Street Gang ... and has a part in there about your dad
Clark (7:14:35 PM): It's about 14 lines, so I'll type in a sentence or two and let you read along ... let me know when you are ready
Me (7:14:43 PM): Go for it, that's great.
Clark (7:15:31 PM): Prelude ... he just got done taking about Johnny Bruce or otherwise known by his locally famous sobriquet of "Hot Sam"
Clark (7:16:36 PM): Dude is his older brother, and lucky for the rest of us he was about 7 years older and didn't hang around with us too much. He did pause long enough to teach us his rules of wiffle ball, touch football, and "Dude ball".
Clark (7:17:29 PM): Dude ball consisted of five or six of us younger guys lined up against a wall in a postage stamp size yard with our faces to a wall, while he would wing a ball at us.
Clark (7:18:10 PM): You were not allowed to peek. Dude's rule. Another one of Dude's pastimes was having us run up Mahlon Street while he shot at us with a BB gun.
Me (7:18:24 PM): Hah! That's classic right there.
Clark (7:18:50 PM): I was excused from this test of young manhood when my sister, Ann, came out and explained to Dude that he would not be using me for a target.
Clark (7:19:52 PM): He would ask my mother to go bird hunting with him, and one time when our front door was left open, he fired a shot into a white plastic planter in our front hall. He was the one who hung the unfortunate name of "Maynard: on David Riley.
Clark (7:20:35 PM): As I said earlier, lucky for us he was older and that he quit bothering with us about the time his parents sent him to Hargrave Military Academy
Clark (7:20:49 PM): Last part is a good one too ... here
Clark (7:21:41 PM): In the eighth grade, I had to do a report on a neighborhood hero as part of my preparation for the Golden Horseshoe test. I chose Dude. My mom suggested other people.
Me (7:22:12 PM): That end line is great.
Clark (7:22:33 PM): I thought it was great ... my mom sent it with Payton's Valentine's Day gift ... It's about 9 nine pages and just a snipit of a look into his past ...I thought you would enjoy.
Me (7:22:55 PM): That's blog style right there, sounds like he's pretty good. I'll have to use that.

Now time for last week's Idol Recap. The fans can't wait to read, while the people who bash it still read as well. We have a good mix. We're in the Dirty Dirty, the ATL for the first night. Josh the glassmaker is the first person to go. His eyes freak them out and they have him sing with their back to them. Simon is frightened, but the others vote him on. JP was 2 seats away from Carrie Underwood in Season 4. He claims to be a music major and he's awful. Asia'h, her dad died 2 days ago and she comes in to do it. Asia'h huh? Weird. Anyways, she's hot and gets through since the judges like her singing and her story. Paula has to walk away from bawling. Miss South Florida is a dumb blonde, but makes it. A good singer. "Possibly the most annoying person I have ever seen in my life."- Simon. Eva busts herself while singing and Simon says she's putting on an act. He tells her to come to him and say she's serious. She says she still loves Simon though. Alex, a 16-year old chick comes in with a posse and 93-year old grandma. She's in for sure and granny is pumped. Nathan says he's 16 and a 9th grade repeat student. Simon says it's a bedroom audition. Him and Simon go at it, he cracked me up. Seacrest asks what a bedroom audition is. "Maybe it's the fact that I refused to spoon with him that he called it that."- Nathan. Amanda is a biker chick/nurse and Randy gives it a trillion percent yes. Paula says she's the real deal and the female Daughtry. She's hardcore and impressive. Josiah dropped out of school and has slept in his car for the last 10 months. He loves living in his car and goes around playing shows. His family has no clue he's living in his car and breaks down crying. He's American, but sings with a British accent. He's my favorite of ATL just because he's interesting, but has talent too.

Second night. Amy Davis, busting out. Plus, she can sing. That's not a bad combo if you ask me. Tiffany, the gospel singing chick just starts breaking the sound barrier. Crazy loud, not good, and her voice wasn't from god like she mentioned. We get twin brothers who had the same girlfriend. Yep, it's as weird as it sounds. She was with one bro before and now has been with the other for the past year. They do this rap duo and were laughed at. The girlfriend comes in next and she's way hot. She brings in a dog for brownie points. We get another dumb blonde and she is bad. "Can I be honest with you? It was excruciating!"- Simon. The twins say behind her back that they told her she was great, but they go back on that word. Cardin is up next. Cardin? Where are these names coming from this year? As Answer told me the other day, these prelim shows go on a few weeks too long. The bums are fun to watch for a bit and then it's more of the same. Joanne is next and she sang the anthem at MSG for the college hoops tourneys. Randy says she must be big time, they send her on. Alesha comes out and sounds like a little kid. Simon says it's dreadful. Randy says she sounds like Dolly Parton and he tells her to come back and sing a Dolly song. She came back and did much better, but Simon still hates it. They send her to Hollywood. Then Simon admits that Paula was right. "Jay Smoove" is a mix of a Kanye/Lupe Fiasco guy. He throws around glitter and rose petals for the ladies. Simon says it was over the top corny. Chikezie Eze from Inglewood, always up to no good. I honestly can't make up these names. He hits up some soul music and jams. I'm a fan. Danny Noriega comes up next with a gangsta name, but is far from it, I think he likes dudes, bad times. Anyways, he has a big voice for a dork. Randy approves of his singing.

Rob & Big you wonder? Last week, the theme is each of them want to get into the Guinness Book of World Records. Rob is after skateboarding and Big with food. Big breaks the peeling 2 bananas in a minute and eating all the way, he had 3 easily. Rob sets 19 world records. This goes to show you how many records are easy to break in the book, so you might as well get your certificate and name in the book, why not? Next week we Rob in a fat suit and he gets to feel what it's like to be Big.

Time for an update on drinks. Since I'm not an alcohol guy at all, let me add my expertise on Gatorade. Anyone tried the new Gatorade G2? This is a low calorie version. I figured I'd get it one day after work just to check it out and see what the hype was about. A big thumbs down from me. On first impression, it's too watered down for my standards since I'm used to regular style Gatorade. Some may like it, but I can't see myself getting this anytime soon. It's drinkable, barely I guess, but I'd steer you away from it, even if my boy Jeter advertises it.

Since I've had my new laptop, I've had issues with the built-in webcam it has. For some reason, it wouldn't recognize it at times and I'd have fits with it. When it worked, it did fine, but I had to switch over to the regular style of cams. The latest addition is a Logitech QuickCam Communicate STX Plus. This thing seems pretty smooth so far and it's real easy to setup. See, we're not just about watching TV and sports in here, we cover all bases of interest. Now you wanna go out there and buy this webcam. Kick over the Gatorade G2 when you see it on the shelves and save your money for this bad boy.

You know one thing I don't get? I've probably spouted off on this before, but hopefully not. It's when people read off of notes. I'm basically talking about speeches. Why can't some people just get up there and wing it? Make it natural instead of something so cut and dry that it serves no purpose. I realize at times it's necessary, but not too often. You see this at graduations, churches, and on TV. I want someone at a graduation to step up one day and say this line: "Everyone else before me did ok, I respect that. However, I'm just going to tell things how it is and not read off some stupid card. This is going to come from my actual opinions and not what someone else may have written up. Then maybe you people may actually pay attention."

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: We're going with another fan suggestion. This week's edition comes to us from The_Freak.

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: I'm not sure why this is funny to me, but it just is.

3 Quick Thangs:

1. It's birthdays you want, it's birthdays you shall get. Let's go with Wednesday, February 13th. That also happens to be my parents' 37th anniversary, dang. Jerry Springer starts us off, he's now 64. Coach K of Duke, 61. I wouldn't have guessed quite that old, but he's doing it and should be the winningest coach in history before all is said and done. Rocker Peter Gabriel, I guess he was relevant in one time, he's doing it for his 58th. Henry Rollins who just screams and is a roid freak, 47. Randy Moss, straight out of West Virginia, 31. No locals to mention today or internet legends, but I'll give out an early shoutout to Bono of #basketball fame, Happy Birthday on the 17th!

2. American Gangster comes out on DVD next Tuesday, February 19th. You better load up, whether you've seen it or not. One of the best movies from 2007, the best I've seen for sure.

3. In the "I learn something everyday" genre, Jas gives us this one. Maybe I'm the only one that isn't up on this, but it's something to think of. Apparently, when you put a crab into a bucket, it will climb out of there. No biggie, right? Then, supposedly when you put 2 in the same bucket, they'll be stuck in there forever as they bring each other down. Hey, I didn't test it out, but I'll take Jas' word for it since she's all smart and stuff, hah. Until next time...