Sunday, August 27, 2006

Circus Sideshow Freaks

It's been a week and I have quite of few interesting topics to mention to the legions of fans out there who read my stuff. I guess it shows that you all are just as bored as me while reading this, so I'll keep pimping it out as usual. In this edition you get stories such as this dude with two parts that most guys only have one of, a fishing trip with Spank, Thursday night ball gone wrong and a shoutout to Shinnston to stop being lazy, video game battles at Posey's, and the Wallace Softball Invitational. Let's get things underway and quit messing around..

An excellent, yet messed up story, I read that was posted from my buddy TyLaw in Lobstah ( Check this out, it's like nothing you've read before:

Are you SURE you want to remove that?
Sat Aug 19, 10:10 AM

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - An Indian businessman born with two penises wants one of them removed surgically as he wants to marry and lead a normal sexual life, a newspaper report said Saturday.

The 24-year-old man from the northern state of Uttar Pradesh admitted himself to a New Delhi hospital this week with an extremely rare medical condition called penile duplication or diphallus, the Times of India said.

"Two fully functional penes is unheard of even in medical literature. In the more common form of diphallus, one organ is rudimentary," the newspaper quoted a surgeon as saying.

I'll just leave it as it is. There isn't a lot more I can add to that story to make it even more freaky. It's like something you'd see in a movie, who has that? 24 years old and he's just now wanting to do something about it? Be in porn or something. A circus sideshow? You're a freak of nature, I'm sure you could make some kind of money having two at once, as mangled as they probably look. What throws me off is that it says "two fully functional". Yep, I'm think the same questions everyone else is, but I'll keep that to myself right now.

Wednesday was a fishing trip with Spank. I start the festivities by picking him up on the West Side at 7:30 AM. We go to Quiet Dell to get minnows, but they were out. We had to wait till 9:30 till the minnow dude came, so we went to the Nutter Fort McDonald's to kill time. Easily one of the worst all time breakfasts I've had in my life. We both took about two bites of our stuff and rolled out. Bad times. But we go back, get our minnows, and head to Stonewall Jackson Lake to set up shop. We finally start fishing at 11:00. We were there for 6 hours, getting out of there at 5:00. We walked a half mile down this trail with our hands full with poles, coolers, chairs, and whatever else we needed.

I figured it had to be a good fishing trip if I brought along some chew. It adds to the whole WV redneck thing. I never got into snuff, but chew I don't mind. I haven't tried it in about 6 or 7 years though, so I was due out of boredom. Red Man Golden Blend. Good times right there. I won't do it hardly ever though since I like my teeth to be pimped out, so I bust it out on the rare occassions. I forgot how dizzy that stuff gets me, it was like I was buzzing from a drink or something if I ever knew how that felt. I always prided myself on the straight edge stuff. Not the punk rock and whole deal, but with drugs and alcohol anyways. I never drink and haven't ever used an illegal drug in my life (weed, pills, etc). Never been drunk, I didn't even drink on my 21st birthday way back when. It's just not for me. Believe what you want on that stuff.

Oh yeah, fishing. I got sidetracked. I didn't get a bite all day at Stonewall, it was rough. Spank got two nice catfish though and we got pics of those. Overall, at Stonewall, it was an uneventful day as far as getting bites go. We go to Weston to eat on the way home. Weston surprised both of us. Been a while since I've been there, but it's no joke for a small town. They got a bunch of things there for that little place. But you can't go wrong with a fishing trip just to be idiots all day and get out of town. We then come home to the East Side and go to Anderson's Pond. We got more action at the pond in one hour than we did all day at Stonewall. We caught some nice bass there.

Thursday night for ball was the worst night ever. That's always our ball night at The Lighthouse. Guess how many people we got this week? 4. Yep, that's it. We called everyone we could think of to play and still nothing. It got to the point we were calling up little high school kids to come and play, but even they had stuff going on. So if you're a local baller and reading this, we need you to show up next week to get some ball in. My town is a pile of garbage for people being lazy bums. You can't get off your couch for 2 hours to play some ball? Ridiculous. I'm not calling anyone out in particular. I'll call out the whole town. Show up to play some ball, get some exercise in ya, it won't hurt, I promise. Weird how we had like 20 guys a few months ago in there and now everyone is missing in action.

Friday night it was video game action at my boy Posey's. We played NCAA 2007 on PS2 and Madden 2007 on GameCube there. Spank owned us as he straight messes cats up in those games. I'm able to hang in Madden though, but I've never seen anyone better in NCAA than he is. We played from 7:00-12:00 and you can't go wrong with that. Nolan stopped up to see the madness, but didn't play. The only downfall to the night? Posey's dog does not shut up. Me and Spank were ready to give it the Chickenwing and make it tap out. But the video game extravaganza overrides that. Also, Posey introduced us to some new chips that I haven't tried. Maybe you have, but if not, check out Lay's KC Masterpiece Hot 'n Spicy chips or Fiery Habenero Doritos.

Saturday rolls around and it's the annual Wallace Invitational Softball Game. This is Cork's reunion crew and I've been going for the past 5 years or so probably. A great time and the night always ends with some good home cooking. My team ended up getting beat, but it was fun nonetheless. I didn't have the game I wanted to play, but I still did ok. My batting was rough today, but I went 2-4. My outs were a line drive shot straight to the pitcher and another I hit to the second baseman and he gunned me. My hits were an infield hit that I legged out Ichiro style and one to the leftfield gap. I just couldn't get anything up in the air too deep though. I played left/center in the field as I like to run around with the speed and try to make some nice plays. I didn't get a chance to dive or anything today, but still always hold my own in the field.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week:

3 Quick Thangs:

1. To the gum fans out there.. and I'm sure I've posted this sometime over the years.. but does it get much better than Bubble Tape? Of course not.

2. Birthdays for Sunday, August 27th you want? That's what I'll give you. Pee-Wee Herman goes for 54. Downtown Julie Brown is 45. Jim Thome hits 36. That's not much of a list, but that's all the staff deems worthy. Monday though, my Dad becomes another year older. Yep, Dude turns 57, he's getting up there. Props to him on that one.

3. I'm back on the Ramen noodles kick. Quick and easy eating.

Sunday, August 20, 2006


Today's topic comes from The_Freak and the explanation is near the end of this blog. Good times indeed to be had for all.

It's movie time. Not new ones, but a few I needed to catch up on. The first I watched was one I borrowed from Cork. It's Hustle & Flow. Of course that movie didn't come out in my area. We never get the good thug movies in my racist redneck area unfortunately, but we're used to that now. Anyways, unbelievable movie here. Terrence Howard straight brings it as an actor here and even can bust out the raps. I've had this soundtrack CD when it came out and me and Cork are both big on it. If you're into the rap game or the thug type of movies, this is right up your alley if you haven't seen yet. Another movie I saw this week? I rented The Benchwarmers. Yep, the movie with Napoleon Dynamite, The Animal, and Joe Dirt. That's Jon Heder, Rob Schneider, and David Spade. To me, those nicknames are what I'll always remember them for. Hilarious movie. If you're into funny movies, this is for you. Both of these movies are highly recommended.

It seems like the Real World crew is dying down. I don't talk to many people anymore who are still into it. Yet I can't miss it and have been with it since the beginning. The finale to Key West was this past week for those not in the know. It seemed like this season flew by. It wasn't much of a season though, but the ending was done well and touching. Paula Walnuts breaks down at the end and thanks the crew for saving her life. Next, we get the reunion show where it'll be drama, I can't wait. Come on now, isn't it time to put each season on a DVD? That'd be money.

With Cork in Morgantown, our Denny's trips are limited, but that doesn't stop us. We hit it up on Saturday night for the first time in a while, so we were due. Not much action to make note of though, wish I had some stories from that, but that's how it goes at times. We got there around 2:00 and there wasn't much of a crowd. Usually you get the drunks and dirty stripper crew then, but nope.

A few interesting things that have me cracking up from my girl Felisha. She's a hardcore Iverson fan and this one I didn't know either. His mom Ann had twin boys and one of them died. Well, the one that lived, she gave him a classic name. Mister Allen Iverson. What's up with that? It's hilarious though, I gotta admit that. He'll be like 7 years old getting all up in kids' grills at school and saying, "That's Mister Allen Iverson to you!" Also, have you heard of the Chicken Noodle Soup Dance? It's so dumb that it's genius. If you haven't seen it yet, here's some cats in Harlem doing it, courtesy of YouTube: You can thank me afterwards. You know you'll be doing it in front of the mirror.

Fantasy football time. On Tuesday, I had my first draft of the year and that one was the elite A#FL. 18 members of a keeper league as I mentioned. I'm satisfied with my team. I have ManDingo Fantasy NCAA league to draft for on the 27th and Sweet Pea's Shinnston Fantasy League to draft for on September 3rd and that will be our money league. I won't ramble on these leagues too much for now, but I'll post my A#FL roster for those interested..

QB: Marc Bulger (STL), Tom Brady (NE), Jay Cutler (DEN), Joey Harrington (MIA)
RB: Julius Jones (DAL), Thomas Jones (CHI), Ciatrick Fason (MIN)
WR: Reggie Brown (PHI), Marty Booker (MIA), Michael Jenkins (ATL), Troy Williamson (MIN)
TE: Todd Heap (BAL), Joe Klopfenstein (STL)
K: Neil Rackers (ARI)
D: Cleveland

Here's a weird one, but I can't be the only one that has ever thought this. Maybe so though, but here goes. You know those little capsule foam toys the kids have? They look like pills, but you drop them in water and they bust open and some funky animal forms? I wondered, what would happen if you swallowed one of those in capsule form? Now someone out there reading is going to try this, hah. You might have a foam giraffe hanging out in your stomach, go for it.

On the CD news, my girl Danielle just wrote me as I was typing this thing out. Here's what she says and I won't put her online nicknames on there so all of you stalkers can't hit her up, hah..

I was reading your blog, which I never do by the way...I'm a bad friend I know
you bought a Pharrell Cd and everyone tells me my fiance looks like him
just a tidbit of info for ya

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week:

3 Quick Thangs:

1. This from the guy with the most posts in Lobstah history, Kasher, so thank him for this great find: Pornotube. Yep, it's YouTube, but porn. You know you can't wait to go inside.

2. Birthdays for Monday, August 21st: Wilt Chamberlain would've been 70. Kenny Rogers is 68, for real?? I knew he mangled himself bad with a facelift, but 68 I wouldnt't have guessed. 2-time Heisman winner Archie Griffin goes for 52. Actress Kim Cattrall is 50. One of my favorite NFL guys ever, Jim McMahon is 47. Amy Fisher hits 32. My boy Spank celebrates his 26th, we're getting old. Hayden Panettiere, the chick that is on the most recent "when is she legal" sites, is 17. Soon, she'll be cracked out like the Olsens, Hiltons, and Lohan. Book it.

3. Madden 2007 out tomorrow night at midnight, w00t!

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Year Of The Dog, Again

It's been a minute since I left you. What's on tap for this issue? I got a lot of new CDs that nobody will care about, but I'll write about anyways towards the end. Also, I see that maybe the religion thing in my last post might've scared some people away from leaving comments (0 comments last time, doh!), but I did get a lot of offline comments about that which were nice, so take that however you want. Third week of August and we're officially in the middle of the month already, it's going fast.

The past few days I've been awake at 9:00 AM on a summer day. I know, that's not like me at all. I gotta try to get on a decent sleep schedule since work will be here before I know it. Sure, I'll still stay up all night some, but I can't do that right up till the first day of work. Every year when I start back up, I'm in a few week coma anyways, but I'll adjust. The kids start here on August 28th, not bad. That's also my Dad's birthday for those who like to know little tidbits like that. He'll be 57, getting up there. He still thinks he's 15 though, nothing wrong with that.

Yesterday, it was off to Morgantown. The kids don't start school there at WVU until Monday, so I didn't have to put up with the madness of that crew yet. The dirty chick scene will be rockin' by that time (always a good thing), but this trip there wasn't any traffic, so all was good. I went with Spank and we rolled up to hang with Cork. We meet Cork at his work place, Chili's. We laughed that Cork was here on a day off, but it was to eat, not work, so all is fair. This was my first time eating at a Chili's and it wasn't bad. I got a 12 ounce ribeye cooked medium rare, loaded mashed potatoes or whatever they're called, a salad, mango tea which was something different but I didn't mind, and we snacked on some appetizers of chips and salsa and also cheesesticks. The chips had a crazy amount of salt on them, we could barely eat them. It's kind of a weird place, but my food was fine. They don't have many dressings for salads to pick from (no Italian, dang) nor do they make baked potatoes. You gotta have a baked potato with steak. The first impression I have is that it was fine, but it didn't set itself away from other restaurants to make me want to go on a regular basis. Spank said they'll be out of business soon, hah. I don't see that happening with the kiddies coming to WVU next week as it should be booming.

Then we roll to Cork's crib for some action. Nah, not porn action and unfortunately no chick action, but you can't get that all the time. Instead, we settled on busting out the XBox for some NCAA 2007 battles. I very rarely play XBox, so the controller setup is always confusing to me. Then again, people say the same thing when they come to my place and pick up the GameCube controller. The gameplay is very nice though and this season's version is worth getting. Spank can't be contained in this game, he's mean at it. After playing that for a while, we then settled on a night of watching RAW. It doesn't get much better than that.

This Sunday it's one of the bigger pay per views of the year. Yep, SummerSlam, hailing from Boston. The card isn't finalized, but I'm still going to give my quick predictions at this point. I look for Cena to win the WWE Title from Edge. Edge is really playing his role up and has been a credible champ in my opinion. I have King Booker retaining over Batista for the World Title as I feel that they need to build this feud up a little longer before giving the belt to the injury prone Batista. DX against the McMahons? It's what it is, but it should be entertaining, with DX getting the win. Hogan and Orton, this is a toughie. For some reason, I'm going to take Orton in this one with Hogan getting a win in a rematch. Even though Flair and Foley are past their primes, they still know how to tell a story and hype up this I Quit Match. I have Foley winning this one as blood will be all over the place like none other. Rey Mysterio beats Chavo.

I went a little wild on getting new CDs on Monday. You know me, I go in big streaks like that, but it's fun. Here's my latest rap and R&B albums..

B.G.: Play It How It Go Collection. My guess on this one is that B.G. is trying to get his lesser named boys some recognition. B Gizzle is still featured big on this CD, so I was interested of course.

C-Bo: Money To Burn. This is a story of rising from basically nothing. C-Bo started out as an underground rapper in Cali and then started gaining some big respect. In 1998, he was actually put in jail for his lyrical content, true story. He's a big controversial rapper and tells it like it is. He's not out to be like anyone else and has been in the game for a long time.

DMX: Year of the Dog, Again. You can't go wrong with anything from the self-proclaimed X Da Beast. That gets me everytime. Plus, for those who have BET, make sure you check out his show, it's high quality laughs. Especially when DMX goes golfing or grocery shopping, pure entertainment. Lord Give Me A Sign is the single released from this one so far and it's good. This is good timing to hype up Spank's karaoke performance a few weekends ago doing some DMX.

Inspectah Deck: The Resident Patient. For those in a coma, Deck is a member of Wu Tang. That alone is worth getting the CD for. A lot of the crew is on this one and it doesn't disappoint.

Jin: 100 Grand Jin. Most people that aren't rap fans know this guy as Jimmy from 2 Fast 2 Furious. But that's not what he does best. He saw his claim to fame being the best freestyle rapper in the history of 106 & Park's Freestyle Friday show a few years back. If you can find clips of that, it's pure skill. Anyways, the kid can spit some lyrics. He's someone I recommend.

Lyfe Jennings: The Phoenix. Want a little pimpin' music in your life? Here you go then. S.E.X. is the single released from this one so far. Three 6 Mafia and Young Buck are on this CD. Laid back flow here, destined to get the chicks feeling this music. Lyfe is good.

M.O.P.: Ghetto Warfare. You like mean rap? This is definitely for you. One of New York's finest right here. Their last few CDs have been bad, I admit, but now that they're away from the mainstream G-Unit backing, they straight rip it on this CD. These guys have been around and do it big. If you're into a lot of cussing in your songs, these guys have more than enough for your liking and a style to their own.

Pharrell: In My Mind. Yep, the skateboard freak. A lot of people on this one and you never know what direction Pharrell is going in. I still like him overall though, even if he's definitely a weird cat. Who is on this CD? Snoop of course, Pusha T of Clipse, Jay-Z, Gwen Stefani, Slim Thug, Nelly, and Kanye. Number One is the song released currently with Kanye.

Talib Kweli: Confidential. This is a best of edition here. This is one of the better lyricists out there and he's labeled as a conscious rapper. If you want pure rhymes and what hip hop is all about, Talib is your guy. He's not trying to make fake beef stories with other rappers or talk about him shooting people up. He just goes at it.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week:

3 Quick Thangs:

1. 8 things that are overrated: makeup on a chick, expensive jewelry, Notorious B.I.G., laying in the sun, Blu-Ray Discs, big goofy sunglasses, Texas Roadhouse, Propel water.

2. Birthday time.. We'll go with Wednesday, August 16th: Frank Gifford, former NFL baller and sportscaster, turns 76. His wife Kathie Lee apparently has the same birthday, hmmm.. She's 53. Madonna goes for 48. To me, she's always been one of those chicks that you know is filthy dirty, but even when she's old, she can sometimes look decent, while other times she looks brutal. Angela Bassett is also 48, dang. No youngsters for this day.

3. By the time most of you read this, my first fantasy fooball league of the year will have been drafted. Yep, the esteemed A#FL, #basketball's big keeper league with 18 members. I'll report on that in the next post. We draft tonight at 7:00 in mIRC, nice.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Shake And Bake!

It's time for a random topic out of nowhere from my budides. This one comes to us from my girl Jenn Jenn. She wants it known that she's single now and to come and get it. Well, that sounded porned out, but you know what I mean. It seems like everyone is on a kick after seeing Talladega Nights, good stuff. Also, download the new Yahoo Messenger 8. It's pimped out.

Any national anthem fans out there? Even if you're not, you'll appreciate this paragraph. While reading one of the Boston Sports Guy's latest columns on ESPN's Page 2, this made me think. He rated Marvin Gaye's 1983 NBA All Star Game performance as the best anthem ever. Of course this is on YouTube as anything you can think of has a video on there to search. Anyways, I'm going to pick #2 on his list for my all time favorite. The Lobstah crew has talked about this before, but a lot of you people haven't seen this one. No, it's not the Carl Lewis one, although that's the first one I think of when someone talks about the anthem as it's so horrendous that it's funny and Charley Steiner's reaction on SportsCenter that night was gold. But I digress. This one comes to us from our friends of north in Canada. It was at an Edmonton Oilers NHL playoff game this year. Just straight up NUTS. If this doesn't give you goosebumps, "you better check yo self and chickety-check yo self before you wreck yo self" as Ice Cube and Das EFX said back in the day on the classic song Check Yo Self. Anyways.. The guy begins the anthem on the mic and then lets the fans finish. It gets rowdy. Check out the reaction from the Anaheim goalie. He's just amazed. Canada has about 10 times the national respect for their country than what our country can ever say. This makes us look like losers, which we probably are. Here's the link, it's a must watch, trust me:

For anyone not into the whole religion scene, you might as well skip this paragraph. I'm not the type of guy to preach about what people should believe in or not, but since this is my space, I can talk about something I've been wanting to accomplish for a long time. Last night, after about 3½ years of working on it, I completed reading the Bible and every word in it. I know what you're thinking, why so long? I didn't just go through it fast to say I did it. Every night before bed, I'd read a certain amount and then highlighted important parts of each section. By doing it that way, I wanted to let it soak in and understand everything and now I'm in business.

I got a great story from a workout the other day. I was lifting with Matt and he was cracking me up good. We get on the subject of chicks with tattoos and we both aren't fans of it. Anyways, I see him standing in the mirror with his back to it and making jokes. That was funny enough already. We got to talking about dirties who put the tats on their lower back, the tramp stamp or whatever you want to call it. Now I wouldn't mind these things if people got original, but they're all the same. That and little kids are getting them nowadays, it's messed up. He's looking in the mirror and pretending he has a tat back there. He's like, "Hey! I can't even see it! I don't know what that tattoo looks like! How do people even know what's there if they can't see it and what's the point?" I couldn't have said it any better. Not that some tats can't look good on people, but I couldn't agree more on these back tats. It makes the girl look dirty in my opinion. And if I offended you, so be it, I wasn't pointing out any one person. Cuss me all you want. I'm just here to state my opinion. He also asked another interesting one. Ever seen a tennis player with tats? That's rare stuff.

Anyone in the mood for some dirty greasy fast food? It's usually not my thing, but I'm going to recommend some McDonald's. You all have seen the new commercials for things that are called Snack Wraps. What you get is chicken wrapped in a tortilla, with cheese, lettuce, and ranch. You can get one for $1.29 (almost Toll Booth Willie style from Sandler for $1.25). They're small, so load up on more than one. I just got done having 3 for lunch as well as a small fry and that filled me up. Go check 'em out, you may just like these.

As of now, it looks like all of my fantasy football leagues have set a draft date. Sunday, August 20th we have the A#FL. This is a #basketball league and is ran by none other than Uncle Wilbur. 18 teams, a keeper league, it's good stuff. Then on Sunday, August 27th, it's ManDingo's NCAA league. I don't know anyone else around here who runs a college league, so we have one up on everyone there. It's also a keeper league and I'm excited about this one. Dingo does a great job running this one. Then lastly, on Sunday, September 3rd, it's the Shinnston Fantasy League, ran by Sweet Pea and we'll draft that one at 9:00 PM. 10 guys in the league, a money league, and it should be some fierce action. Sweet Pea already is claiming to be champ as he's NEVAARRR lost in a fantasy league he's ran before. Hmm.. Maybe he knows, but that's pretty big odds to talk up in preseason, we'll see if he can handle the bullseye on his back all season.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: (Bonus points for her rocking out the Celtics gear in one of her pics.)

3 Quick Thangs:

1. It's Yer Birfday. This time we'll go with Friday, August 11th: Crazy evangelist Jerry Falwell turns 73 if he's still living. Don't you like how I never check if these people are still alive or not? The immortal Hulk Hogan goes for 53. Former NBA whitey baller Craig Ehlo is 45. Melky Cabrera of the Yankees hits 22 and he's going to be a quality player in a few years. My girl Rachel of Point Pleasant, now in Florida, hits 19, have a good one down there in the mean streets. Bonus points to her for liking 80s hair bands.

2. Maurice Clarett, what a fool. You know what gets me on that whole story? The assault rifle. That thing is straight gangsta, what was he going to do with it? It looked like a video game gun.

3. Madden 2007 comes out on Tuesday, August 22nd. For the locals, there's a tourney on Saturday at Eastpointe's GameStop at 1:00 PM. If Spank enters this one, a word to the wise out there, don't even bother showing up. You'll just get waxed. Don't say I didn't warn ya. I hope to be there on Monday night on the 21st to get it early. That's the plan anyways.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Good Ol' Ricky Bobby

Hey there. So what's on tap for us to talk about in this latest edition of my ramblings? It's a new month since our last post for whatever that's worth and time is flying by. Baseball season is getting into full force, fantasy football leagues are forming, hopefully this hot weather ends very soon, and each passing day is closer to NBA Opening Night. I'll let all of that sink into your heads for a few seconds and then you can digest the rest of my random words as I tell the tales of my crew and our happenings..

I've posted this to the Lobstah crew, but it's worthy of putting in here too. The other day I went to Fairmont and strolled into Wal-Mart. After handling my business, I went across the street to Dragon Buffet to load up on Chinese. I walk in and there's this Chinese kid that is about 10 years old or so. He asks where I want to sit and after figuring it out, he's helping his family run the joint today. I was by myself, so I took along a college football magazine so I'd have something to look at while in there. Anyways, the kid peeks over my shoulder and gets all excited and wonders if that's a new college mag. We get to talking and turns out this kid knows his football for that age and is a big Ohio State fan. After talking for a few with him as I ate, he actually sits down at the table and starts looking through the mag. This was cracking me up. He did get my respect when he started bashing WVU for having such a girlie schedule that it's pathetic. Suck it with that cupcake schedule. And this kid was like 10 and knew that. I go to pay and he's the one that handles the money. Kid is a mini Donald Trump. Then he thanks me for letting him look at mag and I go about my way. As Trick Daddy would say, "Trick luuuuuu da kiiiiiids." So that's your heartfelt story today since I'm a nice guy like that.

Friday night was big action in Fairmont. A crew of 7 of us (Spank, Fortney, Abbey, Darren, his chick, Mudcat, and myself) rolled to Muriale's for some quality food. Spank puts the food away like no other. I don't care who you are reading this, you can't hang with him in an eating contest, zero chance. I got the veal parmigiana and it was great. After that, we had 2 hours to kill before it was movie time. That's when we rolled to Valley Worlds of Fun. I haven't been there in like 7 or 8 years probably and they added a crazy amount of stuff. I started out the front 9 on fire, but fell apart in the back 9. I ended up with a 53. Mudcat wins the festivities with a solid 49. Darren's chick (who I don't even know a name of since I wasn't introduced) went off for 2 hole-in-ones. She shot bad, but when you get two hole-in-ones, that cancels out the bad total score and shuts everyone else up. Mudcat, nice job man. I'm up for mini golf anytime.

Ricky Bobby time. Yep, Talladega Nights. The theater was jam packed and it's a very funny movie. It's not "great", but if you're into funny movies, you'll like this one a lot and be rolling. I'll rate it a 7 out of 10. You also can't go wrong with Ali G playing the main "bad" dude here named Jean Girard in the movie. The accent cracks me up good. Along with the 7 that went to Muriale's and mini golf, we were joined at the theater by none other than the Mills Boys (Paul and Jimmy), Paul's chick, as well as Sweet Pea and Aubrey. Speaking of Sweet Pea, I'm along for the ride for Shinnston Fantasy Football that he's running and getting excited for the melee that is about to ensue.

Tuesday night with the crew it was night volleyball action. It's been a while since we've played and we were due. I'm not any good, but it's still fun to go out there and make a fool out of myself and get some nice laughs in while building up a sweat. I do like my serve as I'm pretty consistent with that, but I can't say much about the rest my game. I'm not like a cripple out there, but I'm not talented in that sport either if that makes sense. One game my team got beat 15-1, it was bad times, but fun nonetheless. Who all was in attendance? I'm sure I'll forget someone, but I'll go off the top of my head here: Fortney, Abbey, Buck, Bowers, Barron, Critchfield, Jimmy Mills, Pimpin' Money Mike, Sweet Pea, Aubrey (I probably mangled her spelling, but I do what I can), Darren, Critchfield's girl Laura, and myself.

I'm getting hooked on baseball cards again. I'm not sure what the deal is, but it's enjoyable. I'm working on the Topps Opening Day 2006 set and so is Walz (Happy 26th to him on Saturday!). It's not an expensive set, but I've put a decent bit of money already into buying boxes to complete this one. I'm not doing bad, but it's going to take a while. So far I've bought 5 boxes of this set and several random packs. Walz has bought a good bit too and eventually we'll go old school style and trade our doubles and dreaded triples. I'll update you guys (not that anyone cares) on how the set is progressing.

I had a bunch of other things to type in this one, but I'm not going to ramble on for 85 pages. I'll start to wrap it up. First, let's go with CDs that I recently got for those interested..

Luni Coleone & Hollow Tip: Still Wanted. Hey, I got another Bay Area CD, imagine that. These guys do it big.

Messy Marv: Hustlan.A.I.R.E. Bay Area's King of the Streets is at it again. On this CD you get Birdman, E-40, Keak Da Sneak, and B-Legit. I love the name of this CD first off, but this guy has some talent if you've never heard his stuff.

Oh No: Exodus Into Unheard Rhythms. This was recommended to me by #basketball hip hop guru Don-G. Think of Oh No as someone similar to Talib Kweli. He's one of those lyrical assassins, can't hate on that.

Pastor Troy: By Choice Or By Force. PT Cruiser's 2nd album this year. If you're in the mood for some grimey, mean, and yelling rap, he's your man. He definitely has his own style and voice and I've always liked it. Hop on board.

P-Dot: My Life Pictures. More Bay Area rap here. I can't get enough of it.

Rick Ross: Port Of Miami. Trick Daddy's protege. We have Lil Wayne, Jay-Z, Mario Winans, Young Jeezy, and Lyfe Jennings on this CD. I'm into his stuff and he has a mean edge to him and even looks like a dirty Trick.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week:

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Normally you wouldn't catch me watching X-Games type stuff during the year. But when it's time for the X-Games, I somehow get sucked in and watch this madness every year. The BMX stuff is my favorite for sure. And Travis Pastrana did the first ever double backflip on a dirtbike in competition for whatever that's worth.

2. "No sugar? Damn. Y'all ain't never got two things that match. Either ya got Kool-aid, no sugar. Peanut butter, no jelly. Ham, no burger. Daaamn."- Smokey from Friday.

3. A low budget WV MySpace, but you might just like it. Something different. Also, on my page there, check out Papoose's Faces of Death in my song box. Easily one of the most powerful chorus sections in a song I've ever heard.