George Lopez & Nasty Noodles

Yes, here we are, it's late August and I'm tired of this heat. I know people in crazy hot areas are laughing that someone in West Virginia is complaining about the heat, but I do. The past week it has been nothing but around 90 or more, not fun times for me. I'm serious when I say bring on my cold weather and snow. Being outside running in this is tough. I still get it done, but it's time to drop the temperature anytime now. Other than that, we have a lot of topics in this one to get through, so that is always easy to write up. It takes time, but I'd rather have a lot of topics to go through instead of coming up with things that might not be as good. This paragraph is getting long for an opener, but we'll talk about terrible peanut noodles, back to work, Valley Falls, Coldstone, George Lopez, softball and reunion action, new CDs, and some truly great gems from Corndog and DerekHood to look forward to.



As expected, my zombie schedule began last Wednesday. I always say before work starts each year that the week or so before, I will go to bed early to prepare for a "normal" schedule. Guess what, you already know, it didn't happen. I think I was up till daylight a day or two before I went back to work. During school, I'm still up late and if I get 6 hours of sleep on a work night, I'm pumped. I can handle it till the middle of the week, then it's tough and I catch up on the hours in the weekend, that's the way it goes. I do like the job a lot though, the only complaint is waking up early of course. The kiddies start back on Tuesday, so that should get things interesting. I could write a book on some of my kids, but I never really like to mix work and the blog together.

I'm not one to ramble on about stories of going out on dates, because honestly, most people could care less about that stuff. I'm a great listener, but you know how it is. Nobody wants to hear nothing but stories of how great their dude or chick is constantly. Sure, it's fine to a degree, but mix it up with some other topics, you know? I will throw in some if it's necessary though and can make a good story without getting into any major details to bore you with. I got to hang a good bit with Shawna again most of last week as she was back in town. A few places I haven't been to I got to experience. I need to get out more I guess, but that's the small town guy in me.



For the locals, and not sure why I've never been in my life, I went to Valley Falls as a surprise on Wednesday. I should've taken the cam with me because the scenery along with the little waterfalls isn't too shabby of a place. There was hardly anyone out there, but was fine to eat on the rocks by the water, watch the kayak people, and whatever else went down. Say what you want about West Virginia, I know the rep we have nationwide for people that don't have a clue about our state, but as far as scenery goes, it's top notch around here if you ask me. If you're one of the 8 people in my area who haven't been to Valley Falls yet, you just may like it to see something different and it be all peaceful out there.

I'm a big ice cream guy, most people know that on me. Actually, as I type this part, I just got off the phone with Clark and he was in the store buying some Breyer's. He asked what my favorite flavor was and although I like Breyer's, I don't know it well enough to have a favorite other than some strawberry stuff. I told him I usually like Cherry Garcia from Ben & Jerry's as my favorite pick. Since we're into ice cream, it was time to hit up Coldstone (Shawna, it was my 2nd guess, not first, so I didn't win, hah). I went with a cup of Berry Berry Berry Good that has strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries mixed in with vanilla ice cream. Along with those fruits, earlier I had some kiwi, more strawberries, and pineapple, so I went wild on fruit for the night. The funny thing to me about Coldstone is how the workers there have to sing and dance. Apparently, and I didn't have too much of a clue, if you throw money into their tip jar, they do a little deal. Shawna ordered something with bananas in it and I guess if you do that, they also have something to go with it and so on. My question was what if these people go to work pissed off or with no sleep? I know they take the job knowing they have to be social, but that'd be tough to be all energetic and acting happy the entire time. They should just explode and have a roid rage every now and then to switch things up and have customers always wondering what's wrong. It'd be entertaining to me anyways.



Now we move to The George Lopez Show. I never watched it when it was around. After weeks of hearing from The_Freak and Shawna of how good it was, I'm finally watching the same reruns on Nickelodeon. The_Freak always would send messages on how hot George's TV show wife is and he's right. She'd be Constance Marie and she's of high quality for those keeping track at home. Also, the shows are easy to get into as they're quick and don't drag on. I like cussing and over the top humor as much as the next guy on shows, but they don't make too many good series type shows that everyone of any age can watch like this one is. It's funny stuff and if you're one of few like me who hasn't checked it out before, flip onto Nick at 10:00 and 10:30 each night, with the same episodes on again at 1:00 and 1:30. If I see another commercial for the Gym Teacher movie, I may have to shoot my TV. I guess they really want us to know that on September 12th it'll premiere, we know already after the 2034th time.

Saturday was part of tradition. Every year on the 4th Saturday of August, Cork and his family have their big reunion. Last year I couldn't make it since I had my high school class reunion, but I've been part of it now for probably the past 6 or 7 years anyways. They were bummed I didn't make it last year, so I guess I'll be an honorary family member, even if I'm really not. We start the evening off with a few big softball games on spacious Wallace Field. The field was cut nice and then before everyone got there, we lined off the bases with chalk and all of that. It's pretty detailed, we even keep book and had a nice turnout. My crew won, I believe by the score of 17-16 after 10 innings of ball. I got to rock out centerfield and at the plate all day, I got on base every time, so I'll take that. We were done after that and it was time to eat.



I was ready to get inside for one as it was scorching hot. Once inside, the ladies had all the food ready to roll. You can't beat some good southern hospitality. No family drama, the food was great, and that's about all you can ask for. I did joke with Jason that some TV crew needs to produce a reality show from Wallace. People would watch that for sure as you never know what will go down with the cast of characters there. People came out of the woodwork once they saw us playing on the field. Some of those same people joined in our game and since Cork's family knows how to make everyone feel at home, they even drove down to eat with us at festivities. You think people in New Jersey would do that for regular bums that just stroll on in? No way.

Now it's time for the Corndog section of the blog. I've said before that at random times, Corndog will send emails out about the sights he sees or if something is on his mind. The last few I got were from 4 in the morning a few nights ago and I'm sure he figured I was still online, which I was. He was making a late night Wal-Mart trip and fires off this question: "Why do people bring babies out at 4 in the morning to go to Wal-Mart?" That's a pretty good point actually. Maybe that's the only time they can go, but that does make you wonder. Then an email after that he sends one of his photos. You never know what you'll get with the photos, but they usually have a good story with them. The body of this email was written as "Check this guy out. The guy and girl with him were cuttin' on his head wrap." I had to bring the pic on the blog to help set the scene there. That's a funky contraption they have on that guy's head.



Onto another funny thing I stumbled across in our message board. It started with TyLaw, our resident lawyer, talking about finding a great deal on a nice briefcase. To make a long story short, apparently the briefcase has the wheels and all of that Something about DerekHood's comment with the dolly has me going good, I can't be the only one. Derek wanted to give his two cents in on Ty's buy (rhymed) and this is the conversation they had:

Derek: you got a briefcase with a telescoping handle and wheels? You are an old woman's vagina.

Ty: I think you may be underestimating the size of the briefcase, using the wheels would be gay, and while I admit that I will probably use them sometimes, I deny that it's on par for gayness with a wheely backpack.

Derek: I hope it's a briefcube, something you could haul a 1980s-era microwave in. A few times a week we can look out our office windows and see this lady from the business department wheeling her laptop-sized briefcase across the parking lot. It is utterly damn ridiculous. You can't put more than 10 pounds worth of shit in there to begin with, and usually the thing doesn't even look full. Rolling it and its tiny little casters over a bumpy parking lot and curbs has got to be more trouble than it's worth. It just looks funny as hell seeing a 4-ft. handle extending out of a foot-tall bag/case/backpack. I think as a joke I may start wheeling my laptop bag around on a dolly.

Here's some food advice. I think food gets a good representation in here and I can come at you from all angles. I might not have a huge appetite as far as one sitting goes, but I am the type that is going to munch throughout the day and like to switch things up on the food scale. Everyone can relate to food, so maybe this will benefit some of the readers. I was at Wal-Mart the other day and needed to load up on some quick and easy food. I can be a decent cook if need be, but I usually take the lazy man's route and just whip something up quick. I go to the asian section and see some thai goodies. On Saturday night, it was time to make a box of peanut noodles. They are from A Taste of Thai and come in this big yellow box. Inside the box is noodles, peanut sauce, coconut, and peanuts. The microwave directions wanted you to put water into the actual box and go that route, but I felt more comfortable on the stove. As I got it going and threw the ingredients in, it was time for the taste test. I like hot stuff to a degree such as peppers and the like, but this stuff was insanely hot and spicy (Curry Man for the wrestling fans) to the point it was no fun to eat. Also, it was terrible in taste, to me anyways. I ate about a fourth of it and tapped out and had to toss it. Dad was still awake, so as I went to throw it away, he was curious to how bad it really was. He took a few bites and thought about what it tasted like and he agreed, brutal. To make a big circle, buying that was a complete waste of money. It was nothing like the awesome sandwich I made in the last blog, not even close.

It's time for the latest batch of CDs to the collection to review. Most of the time this is always rap, you know how I do around here.



Ice Cube: Raw Footage. One of my all time favorites is back in action. Cube keeps his style the same as he did 20 years ago, raw and rugged. If you're a Cube person, no way you won't like this one. Or at least that's what I think anyways. Singles that are out there that you probably have heard are Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It and Do Ya Thing, which has a great Dre sounding type beat. Others to go out and get are Hood Mentality and Tomorrow.

Nappy Roots: The Humdinger. Where have these guys been? It's been a while, but the boys from Kentucky have another out. Their style? It's southern/country-fied rap. It's similar to a Bubba Sparxxx type of storyline in that it's nothing gangsta, just them doing their raps on what they do on a regular basis. My favorite on the album would have to be Good Day. Trick Daddy and Nas style, it has kids as the chorus, that usually works for some reason.

ONYX: Cold Case Files - Murda Investigation. Another one of those, where have these guys been? I'm not sure how much relevance ONYX holds today, but 15 years ago or so, they could bring it. Sticky Fingaz with his unique voice and screaming always seemed to work for me as he brings about a touch of meanness. Is that even a word? It will be here. I haven't checked this one out yet.

Yung Berg: Look What You Made Me. Another I haven't popped in yet since I just got these, but we go the R&B route on this. A lot of names appearing here such as Ray J, Twista, Trey Songz, Lloyd, Amerie, and Eve just to name a few. The thing on Berg this summer created a controversy. In short words without posting the entire deal, he basically called out the black girls and says he's not into them at all. Then he had everyone all over him and he had to make up this fake apology. We'll see if that affects his CD sales.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: This dirty is also a Bears fan, so she can't be too bad. she's one of those who puts up a zillion pics that we always joke about. But here ya go, http://www.myspace.com/kjl81

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: Another one where I could be the only one laughing about it, but it's worth a try to post:



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Tuesday, August 26th. That's what birthdays we'll conquer today. One of my favorite guys, Celtics announcer and Hall of Famer Tommy Heinsohn, 71. Saxophonist Brandon Marsalis, 48. NFL running back and cokehead Jamal Lewis, 29. Michael Jackson's buddy Macualay Culkin, 28. Talk about falling off the face of the earth, Macaulay is a total mess right now. That's about all we can do for today though, nothing too amazing.

2. No idea how it was figured out, but we'll roll with it as today's weird fact. If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would be seven feet, two inches tall. I think she'd be crossed off my list, the giant amazon girls can be for someone else, even if it is Barbie. :)

3. The Olympics have ended. We all know what countries did the best and all of that. I'll list a few who I was surprised on the final medal count who even had something: Togo, Moldova, and Mauritius all received 1 medal. Tajikistan and Kyrgyzstan each had 2. I'd venture to say that 99% of people couldn't pick these places out on a map. I know I couldn't. I mean, I know the general area of some, but that's about it.

Provolone Cheese & Gold Medals

How many out there are big Olympics fans? Wherever you are, you can at least relate to them. People from all over come in to read the blog. I didn't say that there's a zillion people reading, but at least they're from all over, so I'll take what I can get. I always start out slow and then after a while I pick up and start to watch a lot more. It's a different type of sports deal if you ask me. I'm a huge sports guy, but a lot of the Olympics sports we only hear about or see on TV once every four years. I mean, seriously, does water polo even get on TV other than this? Synchronized swimming? Synchronized swimming is a "sport"? Get out of here.



Some may want my opinion on the main Olympics story. Some may not, but I'll give it regardless. What that is would be Michael Phelps. I keep up with the hype, but I didn't actually watch one of his live events until the 7th gold medal. This guy is a total freak of nature, I'm going to give him that. The comeback in the 7th race against the Cavic dude was pretty impressive. The media is all over this guy's nads of course and it makes a great story. I'm not debating that. What I will debate is how they are saying he's the greatest "athlete" of all time. Really now? I'm not one that is going to say that swimmers aren't athletes because they definitely are. I will debate that he's the greatest athlete ever. By far the best swimmer ever? I don't even know swimming and I'd say that has to be true, but he won't get my vote for best athlete of all time. Actually I don't have a vote on that off the top of my head, but it'd have to be someone that is awesome in multiple sports. Still, the kid is pretty amazing for what he does.

I must've been really bored the other afternoon. I caught myself sitting around for a while watching chicks fencing. Apparently it's not even called fencing anymore? NBC was calling it "sabre" the other day, weird. Or is that a branch of fencing? I have no idea and you don't either and won't see it for another 4 years. And how about those 9 year old Chinese gymnastic girls? That's just wrong. Those chicks are 60 pounds or whatever and no way they're of age. I mean, even most of our chicks look like wee little girls, so hard to tell what kind of rules are being broken. I feel with that, if I watched it, it's similar to the Little League World Series. Now that is awesome as it's going on this weekend, but when I think of Olympics, I think of big people for some reason, not little kids who haven't hit puberty yet.



This is going to be a sports filled blog, but I'll have a variety, so you should find something that keeps your interest. Our softball season ended on Saturday. I keep everyone updated on the happenings. We played a doubleheader on Friday and it was pretty bad to be honest. The first game we got beat 13-3 and the second 11-1, both ending in 10-run rule games after the 4th or 5th inning. The first game was by far the worst fielding our team has had as a whole in our short history. Not to mention that our bats weren't doing much. I was happy with my games that night, but when a win doesn't come through, that's bad times. We weren't nearly as good as last season, when we finished 3rd in the tourney. Saturday was the tourney. We finished the season I believe in 8th Place. What kind of prize did that get us? It got us a 9:00 in the morning start time to open the tourney. No joke. It was about 50 degrees when we started and was pretty cool for this time of year. People came with towels around them, so cold and I even brought coffee for the trip. I don't even like coffee is the bad part, that's how warm I wanted to be I guess. Plus, the store was out of hot chocolate, ugh. I ended up getting this stuff that was called 100% Columbian blend (it was probably made in Montana for all I know) and I put 2 packets of sugar with some Irish creme in it. Not good, but like I said, it was warm.

What was the problem with Saturday? Not only did most of us wake up at 7:00 to gear up for the action, we didn't even get an official game in. One of the rules is that there must be 5 chicks present. Another rule is that once playoff day hits, you can only play the people that have played a certain amount of games for it to be legit. In other words, you can't bring some stud college baller in to play who hasn't suited up all season. Fair enough I guess. We were one girl short and that had people all kinds of fired up. Still, I wasn't about to drive 45 minutes for no reason and not get any kind of game in. The team we were scheduled against, their team showed up with the full roster, imagine that. Anyways, they were good sports enough to get in a scrimmage with us and then they advance with the forfeit. It wasn't a lost day after all, but it would've been nice if the game had counted and to see if we could advance and go on a playoff run like we did last summmer. Hopefully we get to rock it again next summer, I'm down if so.



You know one thing I never understood? That is bass in cars. Don't get me wrong, a quality system is usually a good purchase and I have one myself, I'm not arguing that. Maybe I'm weird on this, but I'd rather hear my music instead of a bunch of junk rattling around. I know it's a younger kid thing, but if I have my stuff jamming, I want the sound quality to be clear versus something just booming. It's funny when you see people with cars around that barely get up the road, but when you get near them, it sounds like someone is inside shaking around 500 empty aluminum cans. That appeal is not for me, maybe I'm old. Now, if you want it as loud as it goes so people can actually hear the music you're listening to, I don't have one problem with that. I might not like the music you're rockin' out to, but if I'm 3 blocks away I'd still rather be able to know what you're listening to, not the beer cans shaking.

Saturday night was long overdue. We haven't hit up Japanese in a while, so I was ready to get into that. On this trip to Shogun, we rolled 6 deep. Not as big as our normal crowds, but it's still a great time either way you go. In attendance was Ozzie, Maria, Kari, Cakes, Cork, and myself. I order my usual as I'm set on that. Filet done medium rare and scallops. Also you get the choice of noodles or rice (I go noodles here), traditional soup, and ginger salad. Everyone else demolished their food and I was wondering how they ate it so fast. I never finish my stuff here, so there's always some giveaways afterwards for the ones still hungry. That's what my buddies get pumped for, hah. Extra food for them. After that, we roll to Ozzie and Maria's new place that I haven't seen yet. I was definitely impressed, this is a long cry from Shinnston. They could have 12 kids and still have room to run around like crazy. My favorite part of the place was either the party shower upstairs or the refrigerator. An awesome TV and everything else, they're doing up big. It's gonna be some place when everything is set inside. Also on this night, I get word that I'll be in Ozzie's wedding next summer, that should be pretty good times. This will also be the first wedding I've ever been in, so that's something to put in the stat books. Weddings usually don't do much for me, but family weddings I actually don't mind one bit. Plus, I get to be in this one, so that's an added incentive for me to get pumped up.



Now it's time a video game update. Most of my video game crew has already been updated on this, but it can't hurt to explain it again. I picked up Madden 09 for 360 on Tuesday and am satisfied with it. The graphics are really smooth and I'm digging the online play a lot. There's no lag and so far, no punks have quit games in the middle of it just to do it. My offense in this year's version, beyond terrible. My D holds up fairly solid, but I can't put big points on the board for the life of me. I did join a 32-man online league. The concept is awesome, but actually setting it up is a task. The good thing is that if one of the league members is online at that time, you can play anyone at any time. The bad thing is when you go to send a league game invite, I'd say 90% of the time that person is already in a game at the moment. They aren't going to drop out of that to be a punk to someone else just to get a league game in. I wish it told you if they were busy or not, actually in another game or could jump right into a league game. It'd be easier to schedule that way. I'm rambling, but I'm liking it so far. It's weird not having Madden's voice as part of the game commentary, but I guess we'll have to adjust. As usual, if you want my 360 gamertag, it is Bird33WV.

How about another movie review? Yep, twice in one week, so hopefully I'm back into the movie scene. Last year I went a bunch like I've noted, but this year so far, not a ton. I need to catch up. On Sunday, I went with Ashley (not the same Ashley from the blog last week, just to confuse everyone even more) and we went to watch The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor. I've never seen any of The Mummy movies before, but figured I'd check this one out. I recommend it for sure. It is 2 hours and kept me interested the entire time. The storyline is pretty good and things were well done. On a rank scale, I'm giving it a 7.5 and one you can watch again. I liked Step Brothers better, since it's my kind of movie, but this one is filled with action. On the movies coming out soon, I'm interested in Death Race and Babylon A.D. You can go wrong with some Jason Statham and Vin Diesel movies if you ask me.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: This one is interesting to me. First, she's a bit older. Second, she's a mom and right beside her kid pics she has pics of her being dirty and then a folder of her tats all up her body. Chinese symbols up her back for a whitey chick? I guess I need to get out of more, but I never understood that one at all. http://www.myspace.com/shan007

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: We go to the blog's video producer, Kasher for this entry. It keeps getting taken down on different links due to copyrights, so I hope it stays up for a bit for anyone to see. If you have a weak stomach with injuries, this one might not be for you, but it's pretty wild. It's a guy mangling his elbow during an Olympic weightlifting event. It gets all out of whack. I couldn't imagine the feeling, but here's the clip:





3 Quick Thangs:

1. We'll go with some birthdays to feast on. We'll jump to Tuesday, August 19th for the action. We start out with a big name, a former president. That'd be Bill Clinton, he'll be 62. He doesn't seem that old to me. Staying in politics, Al Gore's wife Tipper, she hits 60. Football old man Morten Andersen, 48. Uncle Jesse Katsopolis, also known as John Stamos, 45. Chandler of Friends, also known as Matthew Perry, 39. Tennis chick turned announcer, Mary Joe Fernandez, 37. Rapper Lil Romeo, son of Master P, 19. That's a pretty solid list if you ask me. Also, a few days early, but I'll get it in here, time to wish my boy Spank a Happy 28th for his birthday on August 21st.

2. Today's little fact? The number of births that occur in India each year is higher than the entire population of Australia.

3. I was telling some of my people last night that I'm a beast at making sandwiches late at night. Last night's creation? Bologna, salami, provolone cheese, hot mustard, pickles, black pepper on Italian bread with a side of green olives. Now if that doesn't sound good to you, then I'll gladly eat it myself. It went well with some peach tea and BBQ chips.

Cage Fighting Step Brothers

This should be one of those easy blogs to write since I have a good bit of stories from different variations to get out there. In this one we'll get to talk about the past week of course. A quick preview shows that we'll get into one of the longest sleeps I've had in quite some time, a Circuit City marathon day, out to the movies, a rare bar appearance, cage fighting in Ohio, Red Lobstah, Waffle House, Starbucks, and MUCH more! You know based on that you're ready to sink your teeth into this blog. Or better yet, feast your eyes on the text if nothing else



I've been wanting to put a new stereo in my car, so I went with an in-dash touchscreen Pioneer model. It's a pop out and has all the options, but that's not the story. I take it in to Circuit City on Tuesday to get it taken care of. I go at 3:00 in the afternoon and drop it off in the garage. They told me it'd probably be an hour or so. With that, I just drove myself and left the car there. I walked down to the hill to eat Arby's (best fast food place I always say) while taking my Wrestling Observer Newsletter with me to kill some time to read as I ate. Then I ran across 4 lanes of traffic, always fun, to hit up Staples. While there, I got some ideas for back to work in a few weeks and talked to someone I worked with there, that also killed some time for me. I walk back over to Circuit City and this was around 4:30. By the time I got out of there, it was 8:30, no kidding. I could've called for a ride for someone to pick me up, but from what they were saying, it'd be done in no time, so I did the marathon. It was brutal as I can't stay still, so I'd either be walking around, reading my wrestling and MMA stuff, or listening to the iPod.

Oh yeah, I didn't even mention that they didn't finish the job on Tuesday. I'm not much on cars, but something how I needed an extra fuse attached and to come in on Friday when the big chief comes in or pay more somewhere else to get it done before that. I figured I'd wait. Besides, the big chief and the other guy working took care of me as far as getting me in and knowing what was up, so I just stayed there. Friday I roll in at 10 in the morning and went home not taking chances I'd be there all day. As soon as I get home, they call and say to pick it up, imagine that. Either way, it's in and even with all of the pain and me being impatient, I'm digging it a lot. Today's moral with that story? When people give you a time that something will be done, don't always take it for granted. Regardless, the Circuit City guys did their thing and was probably a lot cheaper than going to some rich boy place to get the same job done.



I haven't done a movie review in a while, so I'm well overdue. Last year I hit up a good bit of movies. This year, as Borat would say, not so much. Shawna came into town last week, so we went to hit up Step Brothers and whatever else action we could get into the rest of the night. She had already seen it once and liked it so much that she wanted to go a second time. It seemed like my kind of movie on paper, so I was in for sure. Give me a stupid comedy with not much plot and I'll probably like it more than the average viewer. I know Will Ferrell is the same character in every movie, but it worked for this one and then some. Him and John C. Reilly together are a riot. I ended up giving this a 7.6 out of 10 and one you need to see, you'll be rolling the entire time. It's not a movie you want to watch with the family though, it'd surprise ya how over the top the language and it being so vulgar, but again, that's my kind of movie, it gets me laughing.

After going out to eat some Italian and hanging with some buddies as ours as we watched some football, it was time to head back to Shinnston. We didn't feel like getting into much that late at night after running around Clarksburg most of the day, but Ashley kept texting and wondering what was going on. Most know I'm not a bar guy at all and Shawna didn't want to hang there either, but since Ashley hadn't seen her in a while and the bar was closed except for a few local legends, we figured we'd head in. All night it was a running joke that Shawna didn't text Ashley about who she was with and stuff and wanted to keep her thinking just because. I guess that's what girls do? Who knows. When she called and said we were about to walk in, I said that Ashley would be more surprised I was coming into the bar rather than I was with Shawna. The words out of her mouth when she first saw us cracked me up, "What the fuck is Ed doing here?" A quick trip there and without it being crowded to where you have to scream at someone 2 feet away from you, not too shabby at all.



Saturday and me and Spank had a little road trip planned the whole day. Cage fighting in Ohio, how can you go wrong with that? We leave town around noon and it's about 2 hours away to St. Clairsville, Ohio or so. We got in the area way early as we like to do and I wanted to check out the casino and dogtracks just to say I've been there. I'm not a gambling guy at all, but the complex is big time. One guy asked for my ID and he saw 1979 and didn't know what to think. He did a double take and said that can't be right, hah. I've never been to Vegas, so I know this is very small time to it, but it reminded me of a little Atlantic City. It was funny to me how you roll through this dirty area of Wheeling and then you look up less than a block away and there's the casino. I watched probably 4 or 5 dog races and that was just fun to watch. I didn't throw any bucks down, as I'm a cheap Italian when it comes to betting (can't beat the system unless you're blog reader TheAnswer), but it was something to see for a bit before we ran out. I also checked out the poker room and then it's ridiculous how crazy some people get on playing machines. It's like their coke, it just never appealed to me.

As usual on our road trips with us two, it has to be rap all the way up and back. We don't get to do that in any other cars with our crew, so we take advantage of it. We were starving, so it was time to hit up Red Lobstahhh. For once, we didn't have to wait when we went. We walked right in, so that helped things out. No big stories here though, but I ended up getting salmon and crab alfredo linguini. It was good in my book, no complaints. We were near Starbucks and Spank was wanting to hit that up. I'm not a coffee guy at all or any of their stuff actually. I've been to a few with some buddies before, but don't think I ever ordered a thing. Spank, by the time we were out of there, cranked through 4 different large drinks. I guess he'd be awake for the cage fighting show, that'd do it. I was bored and got a banana/chocolate smoothie. It wasn't bad, but with the espresso added in, it had too much of a coffee taste, so that didn't help things for me. It reminded me of a protein shake, so I was able to drink most of it, but don't see me getting it again.



After hanging around some of the fighters earlier during weigh-ins, and then getting back from eating, we're back at the Carnes Center to gear up for the show. This was around 6:30 and showtime started at 7:30. Spank works with a guy named Kenny and that was one reason we went to the show. We ended up getting ringside tickets off of Kenny's parents and they turned out pretty good. The setup of the arena was much better than I expected. I figured it'd be a dump, but this place was like brand new. I'd guess it held about 1200 people and it was jammed packed. People were paying $20 just to stand up. Before I even get into the show, if you've never been to a MMA show before, you must go see it in person, it's off the charts. The crowd reminded me of a mix between a Toughman crowd and a great indy wrestling show. It's nowhere you'd want to take a chick in other words.

The promotion Hard Knocks Cage Fights brought a good product. You can see their website at: http://www.hardknockscagefights.com. We got to see about 20 fights and it was all out action. Some guys didn't belong there, but the guys that really were on their game brought it and showed they have talent. In my opinion, with MMA, if you have a legit wrestling background, you have a decent chance of success. Sure, you can be a big slugger or something of that like, but I still like the odds of a wrestling or submission specialist to come out on top most times than not. Kenny was impressive as he made short work of his opponent. In the 145 pound class, he took this guy to the mat immediately. After that, they stand up and then Kenny finds the arm, drops to the ground while the guy is standing and is cranking on it with a smooth armbar. The dude had to tap out in no time as it was pretty sick. In all of the fights, I think we only saw 2 decisions all night. Some guys got jacked up out there and it gave for quality action I'd definitely go to again. The best fight of the night, some locals may know one of the names. He is Ronnie Green out of Wheeling. I'm guessing he's about 21 or so and is now the Featherweight Champion after his win. He was a 3-time WV state wrestling champ and him and Davis Sosa put on a clinic. They went to a split decision war and the crowd was pumped.



To the awesome crowd, the main event was the topper. A local guy by the name of Travis "The Terror" Clark is this guy that is tatted up to about every inch of his body. He was there selling merchandise and all of this and a guy we talked to who had been to the last show said we had to see his entrance and how the crowd goes insane for him. He came out to Walk by Pantera and that just got the crowd amped up the way it is. For the wrestling fans, you know how that one does from the old ECW days when Rob Van Dam would come out to that. Me and Spank both think that the guy they had him fight was just a tomato can, but either way, the crowd didn't mind. I'd say 95% of the people were just going ballistic for this guy and it blew me away how he was like a semi-god to these people. He came out and just busted this guy up bad and everyone left happy due to it. I had my cam on me, but didn't even think to get video of this part of the night. Actually, for the trip, I didn't get hardly any pics, I slacked on that one.

Some out there are wondering how the "Cage Girls" were at this event. For as good as the event was, these girls were beyond terrible. I just call them as I see them, but I wasn't the only one who thought so. Now I'm not expecting anything major out of some dirty ring girl, but these had no business up there. It was a running joke in our section as we'd be laughing at how bad their dancing was, how they'd do the same things, and that they didn't get a ton of reaction. Imagine that. It's bad when someone is out there bouncing around in a bikini and a lot of the guys (or chicks for that matter) don't even care.



On the way home, it was Waffle House time. The waitresses/cooks tonight were new ones we had to break in. We didn't plan anything this time, but it was some chick and this older pimp guy. They were waiting on the morning paper to get there and when the paper woman stopped in, they were pumped. Interesting. The lady comes in and he gets all excited and they give her free coffee. While we're eating, we're the only ones there and they go in the back and read the paper. Nothing wrong with that at all, plus the pimp would always make sure things were right for us on how he cooked it and that. You don't get that in some rich boy restaurant, dude was on his game. We hooked them up with a pretty good tip. I've talked about tipping before, but Spank is in the same mold as me with that. It doesn't have to be too crazy, but hook these people up, they aren't making a lot to begin with and gotta bust their butt. One thing I've cussed about before is the gratuity, which Waffle House doesn't do, but Red Lobstahhh does. I know most people can't be trusted to leave a good tip, but ugh. That's just an insult. We compared the tip thing on the way home to get gas. I absolutely hate when you pull into a prepay gas station. What am I gonna do? Just drive off like some bandit and not pay for my gas? I figure a few people may do that every so often, but come on people, that rarely happens. Then you try to guess on what it takes to fill up and it's never close and you still gotta walk away fired up at the pump. You gratuity and prepay gas people, stop with the insults and treat us like regular bums, you'll get your money regardless.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/ms_sandy_bacon

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: This was sent in to me by Corndog a few weeks ago. For some reason, I can watch flippy type moves and tricks all day and not get tired of it. Damien Walters is the guy here if you haven't heard of him, just some amazing stuff:





3 Quick Thangs:

1. We'll jump to Wednesday, August 13th for the birthday update. We start out with Fidel Castro, he's now 82. Danny Bonaduce of the Partridge Family and reality shows, 49. Former M's and Yankeees player Jay Buhner, him and his bald head are 44. #basketball alum, TyLaw is also doing it today for his 26th, have a good one man!

2. I haven't done a sleep update lately. I'm still on a weird schedule and I'm sure that'll change just a big come work time, but I'll adjust. On Tuesday night, I went wild and had 12½ hours of sleep straight, that's getting it done in a major way.

3. Today's fact to gain some knowledge? A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

The Graffiti Chef

It's been a minute, but it's allowed every now and then. As my summer is nearing an end, things are still going down in the area. As usual, I'll have to bust out the stories and get the text flowing into your brains.

A quick softball update. Somehow, our team is still in existence. After the melee last week, we push into the playoffs in a few weeks. An update on the ejections is that Posey is now done for the season and is off the team. He has Friday night poker action to back him up, so not all is lost since he won't be able to get in the rest of the softball games. He's able to joke about it and it gave us some good stories, so you can't go wrong. We only have a few games left anyways, but still. This past week, we had a doubleheader, won the first one 17-4 and got beat in a heartbreaker in the second, 12-11. Playoffs are on August 16th, so it's flying by for Dyno Nobel. We're now 5-7 on the season, not where we want to be.



I'm sure it's been in the blog before, but it's time for a return. That would be Yahoo Graffiti. To people that unfortunately haven't played that game before, what it can be compared to would be Win, Lose, or Draw, or Pictionary, the same deal. Back in the days of #basketball, the greatest chatroom evarrr, we'd schedule late night battles in Graffiti. I know, it doesn't seem like much, but get together a crew of your people and go at it. I'm beyond terrible at drawing, but it's still a blast and people get into it. Blog contributor Corndog (he'll be back later in the blog too) is the man at this, to the point we call it CornArt when he draws. Saturday night we played till around 3:00 in the morning and featured a crew of Corndog, The_Freak, Commish Kasher, Blahah, TheAnswer, and myself. It's tough to describe if you haven't played with your crew before, but you should check it out.

It's fantasy football season. Maybe a bit early, but we had our big A#FL draft on Sunday. We bring it with this league. It's 18 members deep and is a keeper league. We keep three players and I go with Tom Brady, Thomas Jones, and Greg Jennings. Then we had a 12-round draft in mIRC. The draft itself took a whopping 4 hours, it's serious. The thing I like and I know I sound like a broken record (kiddies don't even know what that is) is that I'll put our #basketball crew's fantasy leagues up against anyone out there. In most leagues, you'll get half the whiners quit in mid season or before and give up. In these leagues, even though they are free, they're the most competitive leagues I've been in. You can be in dead last and you're still into your team just as much as Day 1. Enough of that, here is yourrrr 2008 Cincinnati Celtics!



QB: Tom Brady - New England
Alex Smith - San Francisco

RB: Thomas Jones - New York Jets
Matt Forte - Chicago
Dom Rhodes - Indianapolis

WR: Greg Jennings - Green Bay
Reggie Brown - Philadelphia
Laurent Robinson - Atlanta
Arnaz Battle - San Francisco
Brandon Lloyd - Chicago
Will Franklin - Kansas City

TE: Vernon Davis - San Francisco
John Carlson - Seattle

K: Nick Folk - Dallas

D: Seattle

I'm happy with my bunch there for the most part. I'm on lock with Brady at the helm, dude is not to be messed with in fantasy stats, especially against other quarterbacks. Now watch him get mangled this season. I'm also a huge Thomas Jones fan and still am very disappointed my Bears just let him go for nothing, ugh. I went with a few homer picks in Matt Forte (RBs in this league when I drafted was fairly thin, plus he'll get a lot of carries) and Brandon Lloyd of my Bears, plus former Irish players Arnaz Battle and John Carlson. My wideouts are inexperienced and I'm banking on some treeeemendous uppppside potential as they say. A third of my roster is Bears or Niners. They could combine their teams and still be garbage. I hope I'm wrong on my Bears though, but that's just how it is.



Onto another supplement recommendation. I've been hearing a lot about it, so I figured I'd try it out. What that is would be Altered State and it's from Muscle Asylum. Before a workout, you crank some of these horse pills in you. Then later sometime, you take another serving. I tried it on Monday and was jacked up almost immediately. With only one day to try it and I haven't bought any yet, just sampled, I can't give any comparisons to NO-Xplode. If you're wanting to be all hyped up and have veins popping out everywhere when you're working out, this stuff seems legit. The downfall is that it's pricey, but you pay for some good quality.

I'll give a quick blast from the past as far as music goes. While running and mowing grass the other day, I put in some Raekwon The Chef into the iPod. If you're any kind of a true rap fan, you'll know all about the 1995 release of Only Built 4 Cuban Linx. I defy you to find one bad song on this entire CD. I'd go as far to say that it's probably in the Top 5 rap albums of all time. As an added piece of information for the sports fans, boxing guru and sports radio guy Max Kellerman calls it the best album evarrr. To get you started, try to find Verbal Intercourse featuring a 21-year old Nas as well as Ghostface Killah or Incarcerated Scarfaces. You won't be disappointed. And if you've never heard any of this CD before, my deepest apologies are out to you.



The random late nights for the summer are coming to an end, but we can't stop. Puff Daddy would say the same as he bounces around in a goofy neon outfit and dances like a goofball. It never gets old to me to see Puff "try" to dance, it's good entertainment. Anyways, there's other entertainment to be had. Corndog works midnight shift at his job and gets bored from time to time. Out of nowhere, he'll send emails of some sights he sees. Among the latest pics is a guy he works with who looks exactly like Randy Moss, a guy in front of him at McDonald's who was ordering tons of food for him and his kids at 1:00 in the morning (I'm sure those kids will be winners when they grow up), an ancient lady being the outside delivery runner at a fast food joint who was as slow as it gets, and many others. I'm all about random to begin with, so when these come through, it's something that maybe I'm the only one laughing at, but it works for me. You know you'll be trying that with your buddies while you're out crusin' through town. Crusin' for a bruisin'.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: The creator of this segment is here to dedicate a girl to us this week. That'd be none other than The_Freak. She gets it done big time with her folder of "My Photos". She's also one of these girls who has a gazillion pics too, which can get annoying, but she works it. http://www.myspace.com/jackieandbrendan

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: This one comes courtesy from Corndog. He's all over the blog this week. I got a kick out of it myself as I've never seen it before. Basically, we have 7 year old kid who stole a ride. The kid cracks me up good. "I wanna do it because it's fun. Fun to do bad things. Drive into a car."



3 Quick Thangs:



1. People are screaming for birthdays, they're not able to handle over a week without them. Due to the requests, I better get to typing. We'll try Tuesday, August 5th. Rocker Rick Derringer, basically remembered as the creator of Hulk Hogan's theme song, Real American, he's 61. Maureen McCormick, better known as Marcia Brady, she's now 52, wow. Psycho Tawny Kitaen (baseball fans will know her stories through Chuck Finley, or Chuck Kitaen) goes for her 47th. Patrick Ewing, 46. MCA of the Beastie Boys, 44. Then it's also my boys Nolan Ryan and Walz's 28th birthdays, they're doing it up big there, have a good one guys!

2. In the fact today that you wouldn't know.. apparently dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

3. I'm still in search of new mob members for my Mobsters crew in MySpace. It's not an app you'd have to have advertised on your page, you can set it to be invisible. It's a good time, take my word on that. Get on there and add me to your mob, you have nothing better to do. Plus, you might end up liking it, imagine that one.