This week's blog title comes to you straight from the frozen tundra of Yellowknife, way way up there in the Northwest Territories of Canada. We'll thank Carolina, a blog fan from way back, for this week's entry.
This looks to be the last post of November as we all gear up for Thanksgiving on Thursday. At least the ones in the US that is. It also looks to be a blog filled with a lot of different topics, some you may not expect. Sure, they all do, but this one will hit some areas that should keep the people interested, but stranger things have and do happen. As you prepare that turkey in the oven (or one of those deep frier deals which I hear makes awesome turkey, but I've never tried) and eat it, try not to fall asleep on me with too much tryptophan. See, every now and then the blog can bust out the big words like that. I gotta keep everyone on their toes anyways.
When I start out a blog, a tough thing people might not realize is what order to put all the things I want to talk about. I hope that most read through each post, but I realize some come in and just want to read something quick and roll out. Fair enough, there's not enough minutes in each day. How about a few quick movie reviews to set the tone of always being in a good mood around here. As I always say, what fun is it to be in a down mood all the time. You might as well make the best of it and stay positive. I'm on Thanksgiving break right now, so the final two days I had with the kiddies before that time, I might as well pop in a movie and go with it. They deserved it and get along well in my room, so not much more I can ask. On Friday, we got to watch Are We Done Yet?. I'm biased towards Ice Cube both as a rapper and actor, so my judgment could be off on this review, but it's what I think. This is a movie that everyone can watch and it's a good time. If you liked the first version, Are We There Yet?, you'll get a kick out of this one too. The kids are funny in it, Cube does his thing, and for the guys (or girls too I guess), can you really go wrong with Nia Long? Ever since coming into her own during the classic Friday, circa 1995, she'd be what we call around here, high quality. I know, you want the rank. We're giving this one 7.5 smacks to the face out of 10.
Monday rolls around and we pop in Drillbit Taylor. This one may not be as family oriented, but if you like a comedy that will have you laughing the entire time as much as I do, this movie is for you. One of the funnier movies I've seen in a good while. As with Are We Done Yet?, this also kept the kiddies interested during the entire time. Throw me into that mix as well. Owen Wilson is the star here as he's a hired bodyguard for this group of three dorks who keep getting bullied at high school by these two older kids. You get tons of pranks, fights, and laughs for days. Troy Gentile and Nate Hartley play their roles to a tee here as well. Go out and rent this one if you haven't yet, you won't be disappointed. In that case, we're giving it 7.9 kicks to the groin out of 10.
People out there have been wondering how Kasher's Hottest Babe Tournament has been going. If you remember, I talked about this not long ago and ran down early results and who all was featured. Now we're down to our Final Four and it's getting intense. In one matchup, we have #2 seed Megan Fox (Actress bracket winner) taking on #3 Carrie Underwood (Singers bracket). On the other side, we get #1 seed Anna Kournikova (Others bracket) facing #7 Lucy Pinder (Models bracket). Out of the four left, I'm throwing my votes in for Lucy Pinder. She's rising up the charts real quick on our message board that we spend WAY too much time on. Megan beat Scarlett Johansson in the Elite Eight to get here, Carrie took out Kate Beckinsale, Kournikova over Allison Stokke and Erin Andrews in a 3-way, and finally Pinder advanced with a win versus Brooke Burke. Give nerds like us who have too much time on our hands a big list of anything and the arguments can be never-ending. I'll be sure to reveal the winner of this once things are complete, so hold tight.
In my local paper recently, there were a few articles to give the rest of the country more firepower for our stereotypes. When you live here, you take it with a grain of salt because a lot of time it's overblown. The stats I'm about to go over now can't be argued though, it makes those in my state who aren't bums thrown into the same mix as some of these others. We were given a failing grade in premature births. The article says out of the child bearing aged (whatever that would be) chicks, 23.1% are uninsured with a 32.6% smoking rate. I'd guess that's the percent of the ones with premature births. Out of that bunch, one out of three are smokers? Ouch. They are probably the ones who smoke while pregnant too. Smoking in general is enough to get me fired up, but when you're carrying a baby too, that's straight up white trash. We again lead the nation in heart disease, rates of diabetes, and high cholesterol, great. Another article in the same time period goes over Huntington, West Virginia. It's deemed as the fattest and unhealthiest city in the entire nation. Hey, I just write about it, not like I'm making it up. This article also says that half of Huntington adults are obese. They are tops in the percentage of elderly people who have lost all of their teeth, 50%. Half, you serious?? The Yellow Pages lists more pizza places (nearly 200) for the Huntington area than the entire state has gyms and health clubs (149). Kristie, you need to get your town in order, hah. Just messing with ya.
Time for some quick pet peeves. What's up with the people who wear their keychains on their upper arms that look like rubbery bracelets? I guess I'm missing out on that fashion. I just don't get it. Also, I've probably rambled on about this next thing before, but the earpiece that is either a phone, iPod, or whatever kind of Bluetooth device? I'm sure it's useful for some people since I don't even know exactly what they are, but to me it screams "Hey, look at me, I want your attention and to be noticed." Lastly, it can't be only me, but how often do you wake up like 2 minutes before your alarm goes off? No matter how much sleep you got that night, if this happens, it can ruin your morning in no time. Those few minutes wouldn't mean anything, but you just seem more refreshed when you sleep until the alarm actually goes off. At least it does to me anyways. I just want to bash my alarm into little pieces when I wake up before it goes off in that situation, just because. But I can't fool anybody, I wake up like a champ and get on with the day regardless.
I'm going to end with a fast one from Saturday afternoon. How fast? Be patient, I'm getting there. Big Cork and his girl Kristin moved yet again, this time not far at all, but to Nutter Fort. We always laugh how often I've helped Cork and Posey move from place to place, but that's what we do. You can't tell your buddies no on things like that, plus it usually ends up not being as bad as you would think. In attendance to help the move was Cork, Ozzie, Posey, and Spank. Posey jokes with me and Cork that everytime we move, he can't let us be in charge since we have no clue on how to load things to save space and have no common sense either. Either way, we're there to add muscle or whatever else. Between Ozzie, Posey, Spank, and myself we went in there like a strung out cokehead bouncing off the walls. We hate sitting around and killing time if we're working. We want to get it done as fast as possible and then we can be bums afterwards. Forget the slow-motion mentality. By the time things were over, we had everything loaded into the U-Haul and unloaded in about an hour's time, it was madness, but a job well done. We didn't mess around one bit with that, moving companies would be jealous or something.
It's time to get this thing to a wrap. The next few blogs should have some decent stories involved if all goes right. This weekend, I'm off to Charlotte, North Carolina with Spank as we head on an NBA trip to see my Celtics do battle. We did this same trip last year and weirdly enough, the Celtics are in town there on the same weekend as they were in 2007. Thanks to the scheduling gods for that one. Also, a big hookup since we have a place to stay at Scotty B's and he came through with some box seats down low for free. You can't put a price on that and everyone knows I'm in for NBA trips. I wrote about the Charlotte trip last year if you want to search in the old blogs around this time. The week after that, it's off to Marietta, Ohio once again to go support Kenny bust heads in some cage fighting action. It doesn't get much better than NBA and MMA in person. That's too much excitement at once for this small town guy and then Christmas is right around the corner, time to get pumped!
Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: We have an old dirty here. 38 years old, but all legal ages can be worthy of consideration. This one again comes to us straight from Arizona Jas's recommendations. This dirty is one that has a zillion pics too, she needs to slow down, but she did make it into this space this week, so you can't do much about that. Anyways, here's this week's selection, thanks Jas! http://www.myspace.com/azcrazygurl
Bird's Video Moment of the Week: We go to the snow infested streets of Webster County to get this addition from Chrissy. If you don't laugh at this one, then I guess you have no humor. Check it out for yourself:
3 Quick Thangs:
1. Let's try birthdays for Tuesday, November 25th and Wednesday, November 26th. Our first double! Why so? Both days don't feature much is why. Tuesday starts out with Ben Stein. You all know his voice from Ferris Bueller's Day Off and Win Ben Stein's Money to name a few, 64. Singer Amy Grant, 48, although I'm not sure she's high on the radar of "celebs". Kelly Bundy, aka Christina Applegate, 37. Wednesday has Tina Turner, who hasn't really been relevant lately, she turns 70. Whoa, I didn't figure that old. She looks 105, but you know. Shawn Kemp and his 26 illegitimate children, he's now 39. I could list a lot of C-list athletes, but I'd only be amusing myself with that, so I'll hold off.
2. This week's words of wisdom, straight from the streets of Maryland.. As usual, these are from real people, which makes it even better..
The_Freak (12:09:55 AM): 9 out of 10 guys prefer women with big breasts..the 10th remaining guy prefers the other 9 guys
3. Corndog is getting mentioned this week. We're filled with blog reader mentions this week, always worth going the extra effort to not disappoint the faithful. Corn is all about karaoke and hits up some pretty good submissions online himself. For anyone that knows Corn, picture a guy with the biggest southern accent and who is never in a bad mood, how can ya not like the guy? His recommendation this week is from Singsnap. Even if you're not a karaoke person, which I'm not, you'll cure some boredom by searching regular bums on here and seeing how they can rock it out. There's even rap on there, so that reeled me in. I know, it doesn't sound like much that would interest you, but don't say I didn't warn ya.. Also, the blog would like to congratulate Corndog for proposing to his chick recently! If you're wondering, she said yes to Corndog's charm.. More to come next week!
Welcome to my little place. Hopefully you like my posts about anything and everything, just a bunch of total randomness. 2004 was when this place started up. Drop me some comments, it's much appreciated. Chat with you guys soon.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Pimp Cups, Christmas Cards, & Faceplants
This will be one of those posts where I have a bunch of different topics to hit. Those are usually pretty easy to write and usually there's something in there for every type of person. In just a few weeks, it'll be Thanksgiving time, but Christmas is already in the air. I guess I understand, and I've said it before it's a money maker, but at least give a little bit of respect to Thanksgiving, that's a fun time. I like Christmas as much as the next person, but hold that stuff off till December. With that said, let's get into this week's topics!
Big Cork turned 27 this past Wednesday, so props to him for that feat. His girl Kristin planned a deal for him that was somewhat of a surprise in Morgantown. She asked some of us to come hang with them and go out to eat for the big night. The plan was for us to hit up Kegler's, a sports bar type place and I was down for that. It's the same place I've written about during softball season this past summer that we went to a few times. We pull into Kegler's and it's packed. One side is full and we go to the other and they have a private party planned, boooo. Then it was Option B, which we really didn't have at the time. As a sidenote, for the people in attendance: Posey, Scherri, Cork, Kristin, Big Mule, Trev Daddy Dollars, Paulie Walnuts, and myself. We then were off to Crockett's Lodge, which I've never been to before. I'm not a big bar dude at all as everyone knows. I was glad it was a bar that wasn't where I was on top of someone and had to scream at them 2 inches away from my face. It was more of the sports bar deal like Kegler's, so I liked that. Plus, I had live NBA games on in front of my face, so that more than made up for it.
As a good laugh, Kristin made Cork a pimp cup for his birthday. We've always joked other the years how we wanted one just because, now he can make that claim. She made the designs herself and it turned out awesome. I want one now. Maybe I can drink my Gatorade out of it. Also, the little waitress chick we had up there, brutal. One of the worst ever, but we didn't make a huge deal out of it since we weren't in a hurry. This place wasn't big, but she'd check on us maybe every 20 minutes or so. She left something off of my order and I asked her about it and she started getting all worried like it was the end of her life. I told her it was cool and she didn't have to panic. Being that she was in a panic, I figured I'd get that part of my order in just a few minutes. Nope, try again. I got it later in the night as she forgot and apologized forever. As we were getting ready to leave, this older dude was mangled drunk. I'm not the party type and really can't stand being around drunks, but this guy was a character. He was on his way out of the place and was stumbling all over the place. He busts into Scherri and almost knocks her off the seat and then a few steps later takes a face plant right to the ground. My favorite part of that was that he'd try to get up real slow, hold himself on the ground and try again. I'd be giving commentary with the oohs and ahhs to set up the mood. Finally, the bouncer helps him get out of there. The moral for me? That's my lesson to never drink. I know I take an extreme negative stance on that, but that's how I've always been.
My sleep schedule is usually all out of whack. This week, it was back to that setup. Saturday night/Sunday morning for example. I go to bed at 6:30 in the morning after being online most of the night or playing video games. No biggie, I go to bed that time on weekends a lot. The thing is, I wake up at 8:00 after 90 minutes of sleep and head to church. I'm home by 9:30 and go back to bed until 12:15. At that time, I eat real quick, get suited up, and then go to Bridgeport to play ball. Weirdly enough, I wasn't tired one bit playing ball this week with the crew and had a real good shooting day. That's a good start to the winter ball playing season and I can definitely tell that running all summer helped that out. Later in the week, here's another. Wednesday night, I was up most of that as well and had to work the next morning. I go to bed at 4:30 in the morning that day after being online for most of that. I wake up at 6:00 and go to work on 90 minutes of sleep and rock it out like a champ. I wasn't tired until I got home and got a 90 minute nap, only to go to bed around 1:00 the next night for work. I always say I'll go to bed at a certain time, but those bed time goals rarely work. The moral to this one? I never learn.
You didn't think I'd have this week's blog and not talk about Call of Duty 5 did you? Tons of my crew and others are so hooked with this that it's probably not healthy, but I always say that I could be hooked to much worse. Tuesday I had work off due to Veteran's Day (Spank and those guys have more balls to do that stuff than I ever will, so they know it's much appreciated), so that meant a day to get my gaming on. After getting in an early morning workout and run, I go to GameStop as soon as the truck shipment arrives and have the masterpiece in my hand. I've been playing it like crazy this week and it's well worth the purchase, go out and get this bad boy if you haven't already. My style is the same on this version as it was on COD4. I play almost nothing but Free-For-All and love that stuff. I can't get into the whole team concept at all in these games as I don't feel there's as much strategy in those. Then again, all of the team guys argue against Free-For-All, so you'll get all kinds of opinions. Graphically, this version is smooth and better than COD4. I won't ramble a lot more on this, but if you're not already on my Xbox 360 buddies list, go ahead and add me to do some battle: Bird33WV
The day I went to pick up COD5, I also went with the parents to pick up a new TV for the living room. Probably from this time of the year on until early January, it's going to be way packed with the traffic from shoppers. It's just something everyone has to deal with. I'm fairly impatient, but Dad is probably the worst of anyone, it cracks me up at times actually. We were waiting for about 20 minutes on Saltwell Road on our way there due to the power company working on the phone lines. People started honking horns and Dad was having enough of the wait as well. As soon as we get the sign to go slow through the section of work, this dude passes us around a corner that he had no business trying it on. The tough guy drivers who hammer on the gas only to see them a minute later behind someone else is always entertaining. As he passed us, Mom said we'd see him in a ditch ahead due to a wreck. We didn't quite see that, but we did see him on the side of the road a bit farther up. What happened? Dude's car was smoking like crazy and he was standing out of it all pissed off. You shouldn't laugh at that, but tough guy probably had it coming. Go rev that car up some more in that piece of junk you were driving. Stuff like that needs to be on video.
Since I said people are always getting into Christmas earlier and earlier, I guess I'll go back on what I said a bit ago. How's that? For a good while now, I've been all over the Christmas card tradition. They go worldwide and I get a kick out of sending them out to places such as Germany, Canada, and all of the parts in between. I'm also a big proponent of actually writing out a card. You can't just get a Christmas card, sign your name on it and mail it out. What's the thought in that? To me, that's garbage, seriously. If you're going to do that to your buddies, I say not even bother. A 4 year old kid can sign their name on a card and send it out, no fun behind that. Put something in that card to make it yours. Write up a little rambling on there or something funny, people will get into it a lot more for the Christmas spirit. Just trust me on this one. I don't know a lot, but I know I'm ready to rock out the cards to my internet crew and whoever else is interested. I have a ton on the list over the years, and if you're on it before, you'll be back more than likely. If you're a newbie, drop me an email at bird33@gmail.com and send me your address and I'll put it with the collection.
I was driving behind this old man the other day in a truck. Nothing out of the ordinary, but I noticed a radar detector in the truck. Still, nothing that is uncommon, right? Well, dude was going about 25 miles an hour on a road that had a 45 mile per hour speed limit. Come on dude, what's the point of that radar detector you have then? Are you just enjoying the scenery as you hold up traffic for a mile and just curious to where the coppers are pulled on the side of the road at? Apparently so since you weren't driving like a madman. Just a little side topic to throw in here.
I'm going to end the main writeup with one that everyone can enjoy (or not enjoy, suit yourself). Credit is given to my boy TMac in Toronto for this find. He found this on a message board of this guy showing off his car and his chick in the same pic. What sparked after that was some of the best message board material you'll see, pages upon pages. As I type this part up, today they have 51 pages of comments. I guess this guy thinks his chick looks good, but I'm not sure anyone will say anything even close to that. Ok, I'll say it, this chick is bad times and I think you'll agree with me. Sure, that could be mean to say, but we're honest around here. I'm a pretty low key guy and try not to bash things too often, but sometimes it's necessary, especially if it gets posted onto the internet. I'll let the comments on this board speak for themselves, this will cure some of your boredom for the day. You can thank TMac for this find later, but for now, click here: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=111777031
Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: Arizona Jas is back at it again. She might be permanent in this section each week, she finds them better than I do probably. I give credit where it's due and we have another fan submission: http://www.myspace.com/chelseathehottyyy
Bird's Video Moment of the Week: A dude getting whipped by a chick. The commentary during all of this is worth it alone. How does this even happen?
3 Quick Thangs:
1. Birthday time and we'll celebrate for Monday, November 17th. What does that day bring us? Let's shake the crystal ball and find out.. Director Martin Scorsese starts things off by being 66. Actress Lauren Hutton, 65. 3-time Cy Young winner, pitcher Tom Seaver, 64. The creator of Saturday Night Live, Lorne Michaels, 64. See a trend here? We're not missing a year it seems like, plus we have plenty to get through. Also at 64 would be actor Danny DeVito. NBA Hall of Fame member, Elvin Hayes, 63. Politician Howard Dean, who I don't consider a celeb, but he had his 15 minutes of fame during the last election when he was a screaming idiot. At least the sound clips of him are funny, but he's 60. Daisy Fuentes, 42. That's a deep list there, most being worthy.
2. The locals need to hit up Snyder's Gourmet Market in Bridgeport. It's pricey, but you get your money's worth and then some. It's a quality deli that has all of your Italian cheeses, meats, olives, desserts, and whatever else you can think of. The setup of this place has to be seen, it's good times. They also have a wine room for people into that type of deal. I loaded up on some of the best cannolis as well as a pound of prosciutto, probably my favorite lunch meat out there, it doesn't get much better.
3. We'll end this edition with some wise words from The_Freak at 3:55 in the morning, uncensored..
Big Cork turned 27 this past Wednesday, so props to him for that feat. His girl Kristin planned a deal for him that was somewhat of a surprise in Morgantown. She asked some of us to come hang with them and go out to eat for the big night. The plan was for us to hit up Kegler's, a sports bar type place and I was down for that. It's the same place I've written about during softball season this past summer that we went to a few times. We pull into Kegler's and it's packed. One side is full and we go to the other and they have a private party planned, boooo. Then it was Option B, which we really didn't have at the time. As a sidenote, for the people in attendance: Posey, Scherri, Cork, Kristin, Big Mule, Trev Daddy Dollars, Paulie Walnuts, and myself. We then were off to Crockett's Lodge, which I've never been to before. I'm not a big bar dude at all as everyone knows. I was glad it was a bar that wasn't where I was on top of someone and had to scream at them 2 inches away from my face. It was more of the sports bar deal like Kegler's, so I liked that. Plus, I had live NBA games on in front of my face, so that more than made up for it.
As a good laugh, Kristin made Cork a pimp cup for his birthday. We've always joked other the years how we wanted one just because, now he can make that claim. She made the designs herself and it turned out awesome. I want one now. Maybe I can drink my Gatorade out of it. Also, the little waitress chick we had up there, brutal. One of the worst ever, but we didn't make a huge deal out of it since we weren't in a hurry. This place wasn't big, but she'd check on us maybe every 20 minutes or so. She left something off of my order and I asked her about it and she started getting all worried like it was the end of her life. I told her it was cool and she didn't have to panic. Being that she was in a panic, I figured I'd get that part of my order in just a few minutes. Nope, try again. I got it later in the night as she forgot and apologized forever. As we were getting ready to leave, this older dude was mangled drunk. I'm not the party type and really can't stand being around drunks, but this guy was a character. He was on his way out of the place and was stumbling all over the place. He busts into Scherri and almost knocks her off the seat and then a few steps later takes a face plant right to the ground. My favorite part of that was that he'd try to get up real slow, hold himself on the ground and try again. I'd be giving commentary with the oohs and ahhs to set up the mood. Finally, the bouncer helps him get out of there. The moral for me? That's my lesson to never drink. I know I take an extreme negative stance on that, but that's how I've always been.
My sleep schedule is usually all out of whack. This week, it was back to that setup. Saturday night/Sunday morning for example. I go to bed at 6:30 in the morning after being online most of the night or playing video games. No biggie, I go to bed that time on weekends a lot. The thing is, I wake up at 8:00 after 90 minutes of sleep and head to church. I'm home by 9:30 and go back to bed until 12:15. At that time, I eat real quick, get suited up, and then go to Bridgeport to play ball. Weirdly enough, I wasn't tired one bit playing ball this week with the crew and had a real good shooting day. That's a good start to the winter ball playing season and I can definitely tell that running all summer helped that out. Later in the week, here's another. Wednesday night, I was up most of that as well and had to work the next morning. I go to bed at 4:30 in the morning that day after being online for most of that. I wake up at 6:00 and go to work on 90 minutes of sleep and rock it out like a champ. I wasn't tired until I got home and got a 90 minute nap, only to go to bed around 1:00 the next night for work. I always say I'll go to bed at a certain time, but those bed time goals rarely work. The moral to this one? I never learn.
You didn't think I'd have this week's blog and not talk about Call of Duty 5 did you? Tons of my crew and others are so hooked with this that it's probably not healthy, but I always say that I could be hooked to much worse. Tuesday I had work off due to Veteran's Day (Spank and those guys have more balls to do that stuff than I ever will, so they know it's much appreciated), so that meant a day to get my gaming on. After getting in an early morning workout and run, I go to GameStop as soon as the truck shipment arrives and have the masterpiece in my hand. I've been playing it like crazy this week and it's well worth the purchase, go out and get this bad boy if you haven't already. My style is the same on this version as it was on COD4. I play almost nothing but Free-For-All and love that stuff. I can't get into the whole team concept at all in these games as I don't feel there's as much strategy in those. Then again, all of the team guys argue against Free-For-All, so you'll get all kinds of opinions. Graphically, this version is smooth and better than COD4. I won't ramble a lot more on this, but if you're not already on my Xbox 360 buddies list, go ahead and add me to do some battle: Bird33WV
The day I went to pick up COD5, I also went with the parents to pick up a new TV for the living room. Probably from this time of the year on until early January, it's going to be way packed with the traffic from shoppers. It's just something everyone has to deal with. I'm fairly impatient, but Dad is probably the worst of anyone, it cracks me up at times actually. We were waiting for about 20 minutes on Saltwell Road on our way there due to the power company working on the phone lines. People started honking horns and Dad was having enough of the wait as well. As soon as we get the sign to go slow through the section of work, this dude passes us around a corner that he had no business trying it on. The tough guy drivers who hammer on the gas only to see them a minute later behind someone else is always entertaining. As he passed us, Mom said we'd see him in a ditch ahead due to a wreck. We didn't quite see that, but we did see him on the side of the road a bit farther up. What happened? Dude's car was smoking like crazy and he was standing out of it all pissed off. You shouldn't laugh at that, but tough guy probably had it coming. Go rev that car up some more in that piece of junk you were driving. Stuff like that needs to be on video.
Since I said people are always getting into Christmas earlier and earlier, I guess I'll go back on what I said a bit ago. How's that? For a good while now, I've been all over the Christmas card tradition. They go worldwide and I get a kick out of sending them out to places such as Germany, Canada, and all of the parts in between. I'm also a big proponent of actually writing out a card. You can't just get a Christmas card, sign your name on it and mail it out. What's the thought in that? To me, that's garbage, seriously. If you're going to do that to your buddies, I say not even bother. A 4 year old kid can sign their name on a card and send it out, no fun behind that. Put something in that card to make it yours. Write up a little rambling on there or something funny, people will get into it a lot more for the Christmas spirit. Just trust me on this one. I don't know a lot, but I know I'm ready to rock out the cards to my internet crew and whoever else is interested. I have a ton on the list over the years, and if you're on it before, you'll be back more than likely. If you're a newbie, drop me an email at bird33@gmail.com and send me your address and I'll put it with the collection.
I was driving behind this old man the other day in a truck. Nothing out of the ordinary, but I noticed a radar detector in the truck. Still, nothing that is uncommon, right? Well, dude was going about 25 miles an hour on a road that had a 45 mile per hour speed limit. Come on dude, what's the point of that radar detector you have then? Are you just enjoying the scenery as you hold up traffic for a mile and just curious to where the coppers are pulled on the side of the road at? Apparently so since you weren't driving like a madman. Just a little side topic to throw in here.
I'm going to end the main writeup with one that everyone can enjoy (or not enjoy, suit yourself). Credit is given to my boy TMac in Toronto for this find. He found this on a message board of this guy showing off his car and his chick in the same pic. What sparked after that was some of the best message board material you'll see, pages upon pages. As I type this part up, today they have 51 pages of comments. I guess this guy thinks his chick looks good, but I'm not sure anyone will say anything even close to that. Ok, I'll say it, this chick is bad times and I think you'll agree with me. Sure, that could be mean to say, but we're honest around here. I'm a pretty low key guy and try not to bash things too often, but sometimes it's necessary, especially if it gets posted onto the internet. I'll let the comments on this board speak for themselves, this will cure some of your boredom for the day. You can thank TMac for this find later, but for now, click here: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=111777031
Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: Arizona Jas is back at it again. She might be permanent in this section each week, she finds them better than I do probably. I give credit where it's due and we have another fan submission: http://www.myspace.com/chelseathehottyyy
Bird's Video Moment of the Week: A dude getting whipped by a chick. The commentary during all of this is worth it alone. How does this even happen?
3 Quick Thangs:
1. Birthday time and we'll celebrate for Monday, November 17th. What does that day bring us? Let's shake the crystal ball and find out.. Director Martin Scorsese starts things off by being 66. Actress Lauren Hutton, 65. 3-time Cy Young winner, pitcher Tom Seaver, 64. The creator of Saturday Night Live, Lorne Michaels, 64. See a trend here? We're not missing a year it seems like, plus we have plenty to get through. Also at 64 would be actor Danny DeVito. NBA Hall of Fame member, Elvin Hayes, 63. Politician Howard Dean, who I don't consider a celeb, but he had his 15 minutes of fame during the last election when he was a screaming idiot. At least the sound clips of him are funny, but he's 60. Daisy Fuentes, 42. That's a deep list there, most being worthy.
2. The locals need to hit up Snyder's Gourmet Market in Bridgeport. It's pricey, but you get your money's worth and then some. It's a quality deli that has all of your Italian cheeses, meats, olives, desserts, and whatever else you can think of. The setup of this place has to be seen, it's good times. They also have a wine room for people into that type of deal. I loaded up on some of the best cannolis as well as a pound of prosciutto, probably my favorite lunch meat out there, it doesn't get much better.
3. We'll end this edition with some wise words from The_Freak at 3:55 in the morning, uncensored..
The_Freak (3:55:29 AM): This bitch on the Food Network is WAY TOO EXCITED
The_Freak (3:56:26 AM): No chick should ever get this excited about food. I'm also sick of her saying "kids". I'm not her fuckin kid.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Triangle Chokes & Mangled Deer
A little road trip action to build into this blog. Not too far away, but still it'll be worthy enough of a post filled with some good stories. Or so I hope anyways. The trip was for another cage fighting show. The last one was in St. Clairsville, Ohio. This one, on the day we left (Saturday), we thought that was our destination. Upon looking on the tickets as we walked out the door, it said Marietta, Ohio. If you know anything about those two places, they're not anywhere near each other. Luckily, we caught that just in time as the trip was starting. It would've been a pretty good story if we had started going north instead of the direction we needed to hit. Along for the ride would be Spank doing the driving, while me and Cork just kicked back and relaxed.
The radio with us is never an argument. It's on one of two things when we're together as a trio. It's either rap or sports radio, nothing else. Most of the ride up, we listened to the WVU football game and then once we got closer, it was the Notre Dame game. Even though I'm "footballed" out this time of year (it's NBA season, come on now, you know me), I still am a big fan and keep up with it like everyone else. It just doesn't rank anywhere near basketball on my level. Most of the ride, ok all of the ride, is driving through the middle of nowhere in a sense. On Route 50 for the locals, you see nothing. I'd hate to live out there because you have to drive a piece just to get to a place to shop. We went through Doddridge County, one of three West Virginia counties that does not have a single stoplight. How's that for facts? That's what I'm here for.
We got to the show at 2:30 for a 7:30 bell time. Yes, 5 hours to kill in Marietta. I always say, better early than late and me and Spank are the champs at that. I HATE it when people are never on time and all of that. After scouting out the arena, we then hit up Parkersburg to get in some Red Lobster action. I wasn't that hungry at the time, but I'll never pass up a chance to chow down on some of those biscuits and quality meals. The story of the session was that Spank ate 125 shrimp on a day that he also wasn't that hungry. He had biscuits, salads, and whatever else to go with it. Apparently the record at the Parkersburg shop is 280 shrimp, but that guy didn't eat anything that day with his meal other than shrimp, so my money is on Spank beating that if he'd ever want to. Me? I would probably tap out at like 25 and be finished.
We finally get to the arena to support Spank's boy Kenny Griffin (in the pic above), as he was in the night's main event. Kenny is one of the best in our state in the 145 pound division, he's a real talent as he brings about some of the best wrestling and submissions that you can get. With that combo, it has to bring about success, but more on his fight in a few. All in all, there were 13 total fights. We got our money's worth 10 minutes into the show and then some. A local radio DJ had a contest with kids on who could eat a piece of pizza the fastest. As they were doing it, this one kid looked like he was about to cry and the crowd couldn't figure out why. Then he starts crying like a little baby and we're still confused. It's pizza, come on. Then after the DJ lets us know what was up, we find out the kid lost a tooth when trying to go so fast with the pizza. I've seen it all now, but the crowd, demented or not, ate that up big time, no pun intended. I was literally in tears laughing, you can't help it. A few months ago in St. Clairsville, that show was great and in an awesome brand new building. However, this show was much better, you had two big screens in the place, as well as entrance music for all fighters. You also had a higher talent scale on this show as the last. Throwdown At The Fairground V.
At the show, the Marines had a setup with a chinup (pullup) bar. If you could do 10, you get a cup, if you get 15, it was a keychain, and 20 gives you a free shirt. I'd say 98% of the people there could barely do more than a few, if that, and that's probably why the Marines set it up like that. The guys running it were a little cocky, so I wanted to go over and have my feel at it. In attendance as guests were UFC fighters Matt Brown of Ultimate Fighter fame and Mike Patt. Before I went, Brown took his turn and ripped off 14 or so. The thing is, you had to do full locked out extensions on the chins and get your chin over the bar. Most people were done when they'd lock out that first time. I don't toot my horn much, but I know I'd be able to rock out chins against just about anyone. These Marine dudes probably looked at me and figured I was some little dork who had no chance and would give them something to laugh at. It's kind of like when you get a dorky white guy who shows up on a streetball court and then ends up schooling everyone. I made sure to go about chest high on my way up instead of chin and was able to do 20 pretty easy that way and stopped after a few later when I knew I had my shirt. I didn't think much of the feat, but it sort of cracked me up having Matt Brown and these guys look up at me as I was doing it and they didn't know what to think. Spank also got a free shirt as well, Shinnston represented.
I'm rambling enough on the show, but hopefully I've kept you a little interested, even if you're not a fan of MMA. It was interesting that the DJ played mostly rap and this was definitely not a rap crowd by any stretch of the means. I'm a rap guy, so I didn't mind of course, but it just seemed out of place. It was more of a hard metal/redneck crowd and I was very surprised at how necked up everyone is down there. The announcer was annoying as all gets, but that's my only complaint of the promotion. I said he is a cross between an auctioneer and Jim Ross of WWE. So think of a guy with a huge accent and rambling on. The worst part is that he'd make jokes that he thought were great, but it made him look pathetic. The main event was great though. Kenny lost his first fight, but it won't hurt his future one bit, he's still legit. He was against another kid who is also a really good wrestler and this guy has won most of his fights by a triangle choke. Kenny said he practiced on defending that move so much, but when he was locked in with it, there wasn't much he could do. Count me in for the next cage fight show. If you've never been before, you're missing out. If you want to know on the promotion we went to see, it's Wolfe Cage Fighting: http://www.wolfefighting.com.
Deer are everywhere! What do I mean? On the way home, I'd say we saw the most deer I've ever seen out on the road before. My area is loaded up with deer as most know. It's nothing to see them run out in front of cars nonstop and be total fools on traffic. Luckily, we didn't mangulate (yes, my word) any deer on this trip, but we saw action in front of us on the interstate. This dude in a Ford Explorer was going around 70 and we see this deer get wiped out and then the deer goes underneath his car and flies through the air. We swerved and then the next exit is our stop to take Cork home. The dude pulls off at the gas station, so we're nosy and want to pull in right beside him for a story. What happens? His chick gets out of the car and checks the damage, which wasn't good. We were making fun of the dude to ourselves that he wasn't even man enough to get out and look for himself that the chick had to do it. Spank and Cork thought maybe it was her car he was driving and he was just freaked out and didn't know how to react, I guess it happens. I remember blasting a deer going about 60 several years back and it just cremated this thing like no other. Everyone around here has busted up their car with a deer before, as weird as that might sound to people out of the area, it's that common.
I had to stop at the bank the other day for an appointment to renew my options. As I was going through some things and making sure how I wanted my options, the bank chick started to look puzzled. She looked at my file on the computer and asked me if it was right I didn't have online banking. I told her that I've never done that, even for being a fairly technology savvy dude outside of that and cell phones. Then I go on to tell her that I'm old school as far as my money goes. I'm one of few people my age that doesn't use a debit card, has never used an ATM machine, and always am a person that carries cash. When I go out to eat with my crew, I'm one of few who isn't busting out the plastic and going through all of those extra steps. I like it simple and quick, guess I'm a weird one since I'm in the minority on that.
Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: Once again, I can't take credit for this week's entry. It makes it easy on me when I just sit back and have someone else find some gems for us. The regular of this section, Arizona Jas, she's back to send us one to check out and it's worthy. http://www.myspace.com/whipit16
Bird's Video Moment of the Week: Cat Fight time. The chick in the blue should do some cage fighting.
3 Quick Thangs:
1. Hey there, it's birthdays for Sunday, November 9th. We start off with baseball manager Whitey Herzog, 77. We stay with baseball and go with Hall of Fame pitcher Bob Gibson. He hits 73. Tom Fogerty of Creedence Clearwater Revival, 68. The Incredible Hulk, Lou Ferrigno, all roided out at 57. Tennis player Stephen Edberg, 32. Pepa of Salt N Pepa fame, 39. I don't think that's too bad of a list. It's not top notch, but it's definitely worthy enough to get a mention.
2. I do believe I have another road trip setup at the end of this month. It's back to Charlotte for a Celtics game and that's as good as it gets for me. I wrote about that last year around this time when I went if you're bored to read those thoughts. You can almost count me in every single time on an NBA trip, even without notice. I'd be excited to watch two bums play, it doesn't matter.
3. Today's fact? Polar bears can eat as many as 86 penguins in a single sitting. Who knew? Also, 46 days till Christmas, time to get pumped up! It's sad nobody cares about Thanksgiving anymore though, Christmas stuff has been out for months, dirty.
The radio with us is never an argument. It's on one of two things when we're together as a trio. It's either rap or sports radio, nothing else. Most of the ride up, we listened to the WVU football game and then once we got closer, it was the Notre Dame game. Even though I'm "footballed" out this time of year (it's NBA season, come on now, you know me), I still am a big fan and keep up with it like everyone else. It just doesn't rank anywhere near basketball on my level. Most of the ride, ok all of the ride, is driving through the middle of nowhere in a sense. On Route 50 for the locals, you see nothing. I'd hate to live out there because you have to drive a piece just to get to a place to shop. We went through Doddridge County, one of three West Virginia counties that does not have a single stoplight. How's that for facts? That's what I'm here for.
We got to the show at 2:30 for a 7:30 bell time. Yes, 5 hours to kill in Marietta. I always say, better early than late and me and Spank are the champs at that. I HATE it when people are never on time and all of that. After scouting out the arena, we then hit up Parkersburg to get in some Red Lobster action. I wasn't that hungry at the time, but I'll never pass up a chance to chow down on some of those biscuits and quality meals. The story of the session was that Spank ate 125 shrimp on a day that he also wasn't that hungry. He had biscuits, salads, and whatever else to go with it. Apparently the record at the Parkersburg shop is 280 shrimp, but that guy didn't eat anything that day with his meal other than shrimp, so my money is on Spank beating that if he'd ever want to. Me? I would probably tap out at like 25 and be finished.
We finally get to the arena to support Spank's boy Kenny Griffin (in the pic above), as he was in the night's main event. Kenny is one of the best in our state in the 145 pound division, he's a real talent as he brings about some of the best wrestling and submissions that you can get. With that combo, it has to bring about success, but more on his fight in a few. All in all, there were 13 total fights. We got our money's worth 10 minutes into the show and then some. A local radio DJ had a contest with kids on who could eat a piece of pizza the fastest. As they were doing it, this one kid looked like he was about to cry and the crowd couldn't figure out why. Then he starts crying like a little baby and we're still confused. It's pizza, come on. Then after the DJ lets us know what was up, we find out the kid lost a tooth when trying to go so fast with the pizza. I've seen it all now, but the crowd, demented or not, ate that up big time, no pun intended. I was literally in tears laughing, you can't help it. A few months ago in St. Clairsville, that show was great and in an awesome brand new building. However, this show was much better, you had two big screens in the place, as well as entrance music for all fighters. You also had a higher talent scale on this show as the last. Throwdown At The Fairground V.
At the show, the Marines had a setup with a chinup (pullup) bar. If you could do 10, you get a cup, if you get 15, it was a keychain, and 20 gives you a free shirt. I'd say 98% of the people there could barely do more than a few, if that, and that's probably why the Marines set it up like that. The guys running it were a little cocky, so I wanted to go over and have my feel at it. In attendance as guests were UFC fighters Matt Brown of Ultimate Fighter fame and Mike Patt. Before I went, Brown took his turn and ripped off 14 or so. The thing is, you had to do full locked out extensions on the chins and get your chin over the bar. Most people were done when they'd lock out that first time. I don't toot my horn much, but I know I'd be able to rock out chins against just about anyone. These Marine dudes probably looked at me and figured I was some little dork who had no chance and would give them something to laugh at. It's kind of like when you get a dorky white guy who shows up on a streetball court and then ends up schooling everyone. I made sure to go about chest high on my way up instead of chin and was able to do 20 pretty easy that way and stopped after a few later when I knew I had my shirt. I didn't think much of the feat, but it sort of cracked me up having Matt Brown and these guys look up at me as I was doing it and they didn't know what to think. Spank also got a free shirt as well, Shinnston represented.
I'm rambling enough on the show, but hopefully I've kept you a little interested, even if you're not a fan of MMA. It was interesting that the DJ played mostly rap and this was definitely not a rap crowd by any stretch of the means. I'm a rap guy, so I didn't mind of course, but it just seemed out of place. It was more of a hard metal/redneck crowd and I was very surprised at how necked up everyone is down there. The announcer was annoying as all gets, but that's my only complaint of the promotion. I said he is a cross between an auctioneer and Jim Ross of WWE. So think of a guy with a huge accent and rambling on. The worst part is that he'd make jokes that he thought were great, but it made him look pathetic. The main event was great though. Kenny lost his first fight, but it won't hurt his future one bit, he's still legit. He was against another kid who is also a really good wrestler and this guy has won most of his fights by a triangle choke. Kenny said he practiced on defending that move so much, but when he was locked in with it, there wasn't much he could do. Count me in for the next cage fight show. If you've never been before, you're missing out. If you want to know on the promotion we went to see, it's Wolfe Cage Fighting: http://www.wolfefighting.com.
Deer are everywhere! What do I mean? On the way home, I'd say we saw the most deer I've ever seen out on the road before. My area is loaded up with deer as most know. It's nothing to see them run out in front of cars nonstop and be total fools on traffic. Luckily, we didn't mangulate (yes, my word) any deer on this trip, but we saw action in front of us on the interstate. This dude in a Ford Explorer was going around 70 and we see this deer get wiped out and then the deer goes underneath his car and flies through the air. We swerved and then the next exit is our stop to take Cork home. The dude pulls off at the gas station, so we're nosy and want to pull in right beside him for a story. What happens? His chick gets out of the car and checks the damage, which wasn't good. We were making fun of the dude to ourselves that he wasn't even man enough to get out and look for himself that the chick had to do it. Spank and Cork thought maybe it was her car he was driving and he was just freaked out and didn't know how to react, I guess it happens. I remember blasting a deer going about 60 several years back and it just cremated this thing like no other. Everyone around here has busted up their car with a deer before, as weird as that might sound to people out of the area, it's that common.
I had to stop at the bank the other day for an appointment to renew my options. As I was going through some things and making sure how I wanted my options, the bank chick started to look puzzled. She looked at my file on the computer and asked me if it was right I didn't have online banking. I told her that I've never done that, even for being a fairly technology savvy dude outside of that and cell phones. Then I go on to tell her that I'm old school as far as my money goes. I'm one of few people my age that doesn't use a debit card, has never used an ATM machine, and always am a person that carries cash. When I go out to eat with my crew, I'm one of few who isn't busting out the plastic and going through all of those extra steps. I like it simple and quick, guess I'm a weird one since I'm in the minority on that.
Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: Once again, I can't take credit for this week's entry. It makes it easy on me when I just sit back and have someone else find some gems for us. The regular of this section, Arizona Jas, she's back to send us one to check out and it's worthy. http://www.myspace.com/whipit16
Bird's Video Moment of the Week: Cat Fight time. The chick in the blue should do some cage fighting.
3 Quick Thangs:
1. Hey there, it's birthdays for Sunday, November 9th. We start off with baseball manager Whitey Herzog, 77. We stay with baseball and go with Hall of Fame pitcher Bob Gibson. He hits 73. Tom Fogerty of Creedence Clearwater Revival, 68. The Incredible Hulk, Lou Ferrigno, all roided out at 57. Tennis player Stephen Edberg, 32. Pepa of Salt N Pepa fame, 39. I don't think that's too bad of a list. It's not top notch, but it's definitely worthy enough to get a mention.
2. I do believe I have another road trip setup at the end of this month. It's back to Charlotte for a Celtics game and that's as good as it gets for me. I wrote about that last year around this time when I went if you're bored to read those thoughts. You can almost count me in every single time on an NBA trip, even without notice. I'd be excited to watch two bums play, it doesn't matter.
3. Today's fact? Polar bears can eat as many as 86 penguins in a single sitting. Who knew? Also, 46 days till Christmas, time to get pumped up! It's sad nobody cares about Thanksgiving anymore though, Christmas stuff has been out for months, dirty.
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