Ronny The Dillweed Paulino

We go to The_Freak for today's topic. I haven't went with a requested topic in while, so it's a good time. We mix in one of my favorite new commercials in with Ronny Paulino of the Pittsburgh Pirates.

It's a late one this year, but I'm finally on spring break. I can't remember it being this late in the year for a long time. The weird part is that it didn't even fall in the week of Easter like it normally does. Oh well, that just means about 8 weeks or so and then it's time to be a bum for the summer. But what you're wanting to know is the adventures that went down since I last made a post in here. Enough playing around, we better uncover the goodies..



The movie fans out there are wondering what I thought when I went last week with the crew. I rolled to Morgantown on Friday and met up with Cork, Kristen, Ozzie, and Maria. The movie in question? That'd be 21, the blackjack theme about beating the system by counting cards. Going in, I was interested in the storyline, so I hoped I would not be let down. I wasn't and it's worth seeing and gets my recommendation. It didn't blow me away, but I enjoyed it and got my money's worth. On the rating scale, I gave it a 7.2 out of 10. If you want another opinion, Ozzie gave it a 8.8 out of 10, that's some high praise for sure. I didn't figure you could go wrong with a movie that had Laurence Fishburne and Kevin Spacey in it, both are great actors I think. The kids in it were a little cheesy, but they played their role fine enough. On the chick side of things, Kate Bosworth looks real nice in this one, even if she did bust out the short hair.

Before that, I was bored and wanted to blow some money after work. That's not always a great thing to do, but it can't hurt to spoil myself the way I look at it. I don't use my digital cam as much as I should, but my old one was dying on me and basically finished. With that in mind, I had an idea of what I wanted. I go to Target and talk to my boy Dave Carter who was running the electronics section. He was able to hook me up with some deals and I decided upon getting the Nikon Coolpix S51. It's really little, 8.1MP, and has a 3 inch screen on the back which I like a lot. It gets a thumbs up from me, I just hope I use this one more than I did my last one. After that, I had some gift certificates from Finish Line that I haven't used since Christmas, I guess I wasn't in a big hurry. They were sitting around the house for too long, so I ended up getting a new pair of running shoes and picked out a newer version of the Adidas Bounce, really comfortable, another thumbs up. The last trip of the day was at Hat World. Not that I don't already have enough hats, but you can't ever have too many. I load up on an old school blue Milwaukee Brewers hat since I love baseball hats with logos that I'm into, even if they're not my team. Then I get a black DC hat, even though I'm not a skater, but I gotta support Rob from Rob & Big fame.



Saturday night had some action. In a few weeks, Kari and Matty Cakes are going to do the marriage thing and of course I'll be there to see the festivities. The bachelor party was set up and we got a big crew to start the night out at Buffalo Wild Wings. I'm probably the only person in the area who has never been to a BDubs before, but I can't say that anymore. It was pretty good as I ordered some boneless wings of asian flavored ones that Ozzie recommended and my normal Chinese pick of honey chicken, both are really good. My only complaint of the night was that it was ridiculously hot in there. I'm talking Atlanta hot in August when we sweat our nads off, it was almost to that level. Other than that, it was a blast watching the NCAA tourney games and just goofing off for 4 hours in there. After that, the dudes and chicks met up and took a van to Morgantown to get rowdy in the streets to start out the real part of the night. Some of us that don't drink tapped out for that even though I'm sure we would've seen some sights. If it's filthy bachelor party stores with drunken debauchery of tearing up MoTown you are wanting, I'm sorry, I don't have any to give you on that end. I should've went just for blog purposes as hard to tell what went down.

For some reason, I get home that Saturday night and just stay up to a stupid hour of the night (day). After being a bum playing video games and being online the whole time, I finally dive into bed at 11:30 AM on Sunday morning. I wake up at 3:00 PM, not great sleep, but through the week, I did pretty well considering. Those 3½ hours of sleep was enough to energize me for the WrestleMania 24 extravaganza at the Fortney Manor. In attendance for the pay per view was Fortney the host, Abbey with Lil Fortney in the oven, Mudcat, Jimmy Mills, Matt Mills, a ton of good food and myself. How can you beat that? The show itself was 4 hours long and I personally liked it. The main thing everyone of us were there for was the Ric Flair/HBK match. Flair ended up losing to "retire" for good and the way they sent him off was excellent. I'm a huge Flair guy anyways, so I'm biased, but we're talking about the greatest wrestler of all time, I won't even argue that. RAW's tribute to Flair the next night at the end of the show was even better and most watching turned into a little wuss and had some admitted tears. Outside of the Flair match, I also liked the Money in the Bank Ladder Match where CM Punk won and Shelton Benjamin is lucky to be alive after the bump he took. The main event of Undertaker winning the title from Edge was much better than I expected, better than the 3-Way of Cena, Triple H, and Orton with Orton retaining.



I get a lot of questions with people always asking me where my American Idol reports have been. I don't like to do the same exact same thing each week in here, but I do realize I haven't given my Idol thoughts in a while in this space. In the Lobstah message board crew that me and the #basketball bunch are part of, I write up a thing each Tuesday night with my thoughts. This shows I have entirely too much time on my hands, but I think it's entertaining enough and I say what's on my mind. This was before Midget Chick got the boot, so keep that in mind, but this is what I wrote:

Dolly Parton week? You serious? These kids barely even know who she is probably and yet again, they have to sing old songs. Not good times, but oh well. Let’s get it’s on!

Brooke: She’s out with the guitar and people banging on stuff and a violin dude. The hick vibe she brought may work for her, but I thought her past stuff was much better. Randy said it was ok and had pitch problems. Paula says she’s wonderful, then she says Paula’s hair is great. Simon said she didn’t have any emotion in the song. He says the group looked weird together.

David Cook: He also comes out with his guitar and does his own arrangement of a Dolly song. He seems to always start out a little slow, but then it picks up. Not too bad, but he didn’t jam like his normal showings. Randy says it’s another hot one. Paula said it was fantastic and he’s well rounded. “If you can make a song about sparrows good, which actually you did, congratulations.”- Simon



Midget Chick: She seemed nervous to me. This style doesn’t work for her I don’t think. First half and second were totally different. First was bad, second I thought she ended up with strong. Randy said It was 6.5 out of 10. Paula says she connected with the audience. Simon says we won’t remember this one. He said it was cute, but forgettable.

Fidel Castro: The third of our first four people who come out jamming with the guitar. He does a faster song than usual for his standards. He’s not bad at the happy and burnt out songs, but I’m not a fan. He still kinda creeps me out. His face does weird things out there on stage. This was better than he normally does though, so I guess that’s a plus. Randy said it was pretty good and he worked it out. Paula said it was one of his strongest performances and he was confident. Simon didn’t like it at all.

Tattoo Chick: If she cleans herself up, she can look ok. I didn’t say amazing. The end made it for her, she rocked the last few lines. Other than that, to me, even though I’m a fan, it wasn’t one of her best. Randy said it’ll be one of the better performances of the night. Paula said it was glorious and she looked great. Simon thought it was good, but not great. “I also think you should have a word with whoever is dressing you right now.”- Simon. He says she doesn’t look like a star at this point.

Kid David: Dolly is creaming over this kid. It seemed like a church song for me. I think it worked for him though in that goofy sense. He hit his notes, so I’ll give him that. Randy says that is the best performance of the night there and David is back. Paula says he has a beautiful aura about him. She says glorious for the 2nd straight person. Simon said it was absolutely on the money.

Kristy Lee: She’s in her element with country week. She walks out like a WV redneck, bare feet. The hair didn’t work for me at all, gotta leave it down instead of up with a tub of grease in it. It seemed like an easy song to sing with no chances taken. Thumbs down from me, but she keeps lasting. Randy said it’s her wheelhouse and it’s her week. Paula says she looks stunning and it was her best performance. Simon said last week was her best and this week was pleasant, but forgettable.



Syesha: The first song of the night that I’ve actually heard before. She’s looking smokin' here, real nice outfit and look, I’m down with that. She did this one sitting on the piano. I knew Whitney Houston did it, but never knew it was a Dolly song. The ending, dang. She killed it big time I thought. Randy said she took on the biggest song of the night and said she did pretty good. Paula says she looks beautiful and her voice is velvety. What? Simon said it paled in comparison to Whitney’s version. “It was good, but not fantastic.”- Simon. Again, I must not know music because I thought it was solid.

Aussie Boy: The band busts out the electric guitar for him. I still like the grimey voice and I feel is really strong. He’s a cross between some early 80s love song rock or 90s grunge. Let’s give this one a thumbs up for sure. Randy said he keeps up bringing it up a notch and it was blazing hot. Paula says he is a star and he looks gorgeous. Simon said that’s the best he’s ever seen him, nice.

He gone! I’m giving that one to Midget Chick. Kristy Lee hangs on again?? What?

I got the prediction right after missing the last few weeks. I've been kicking Kristy Lee off the past few and she should've been gone a month ago, but Ramiele goes home.

Some last week liked Corndog's words of wisdom. He's back with another good one here that he wrote me out of nowhere with the other day. You might want to take notes on this one as he said verbatim: "dude...someone opened a pack of meatball hot pockets and only ate 1 of them. Who only eats one hot pocket at a time?! i had my heart set on that too!" That ruined his day there. So remember these words, you may need them in a critical situation one day.

We're winding this big episode up and if you've read this far through my ramblings, you either have too much time on your hands too or I must be doing an ok job of keeping your attention. Either way, I'll take what I can get. Yesterday, it was due for another GNC trip. First of the month savings with my Gold Card, welfare style, so I had to get some new things. I ended up going back to one of my favorites, No-Explode. I'm usually not one to hype supplements up too much, but this is the real deal for pre-workout mixes. I've said before, but this stuff will scare you how good it works. I know that's hard to believe, but trust me on this one and go buy it. Aside from that, I ended up getting a product called Leucine XT. These are horse pills that basically serve with protein synthesis to give bigger pumps during workouts and burn more calories as you go. We'll give it a try.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/msandrearenee

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: We have a double feature this time around. First, we go to the mean streets of Webster County from a vid sent by Chrissy. You gotta love this one, plus the song will stick in your head. Kid gets down with it big time and I've probably watched this 10 times so far, Dey Know style: http://youtube.com/watch?v=ma8k9qMlcxs. Kasher is at it again. This one is a video made of WNBA Live 08 if there were such a thing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FGI7R0u3TQ

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Happy happy time! Let's try Monday, April 7th to set the tone right as we have a loaded up list, huge. Francis Ford Coppola, director of The Godfather, he's now 69. Football stud Tony Dorsett, 54. Actor Jackie Chan, he's also 54 and still flipping and flopping all over the place, he's a machine. Another actor, this one on the serious side, Russell Crowe, 44. Go see American Gangster if you haven't yet, I've told you people enough. C-level celeb Bill Bellamy, 40. Actor Jack Black, he goes for 39 and School of Rock is still one of my favorite kiddie type movies. My boy Ricky "Running" Waters of Notre Dame fame, he's also 39 and seems like he's been done with football for ages. Posh Spice is slutting it up for her 33rd. The Barber Twins of NFL lure, they go for 33 as well. One of #basketball's legends, DerekHood himself, he celebrates for his 26th.

2. Today's silly fact? A dime has 118 ridges around the edge. So if you were there counting, I've just saved you some time. Don't believe me? Count em out.

3. I went out to eat yesterday with my buddies from work. We hit up Bob Evans for lunch. I've always ate breakfast there, but never went during lunch time. This time, we go during lunch, but I get breakfast anyways, go figure. Raspberry crepes with cream cheese and whipped cream to go with some biscuits and gravy, yum yum. Go get some of those raspberry crepes, they rock it out.

Sip Stealing: The Madness!

Welcome to the last post of March, we're moving along to warmer weather. That means that I have to start mowing grass soon, not fun. Even though my yard isn't big, it's still the point of having to do it on a regular basis. The fans are beating at my door and demanding a new blog, so when the happens, I must get the typing fingers ready before someone chops them off with a machete. What's happening in this edition? We get some Easter chatter, flavored jelly beans, sip stealing, WrestleMania, Corndog with some of his wise words, and much much more..



It's been around for a while, but it's still a commercial that I like. That would be the Coke commercial that deals with sip stealing. For those who are under a rock and don't know of sip stealing, I'll give it a quick intro. You're at some dirty gas station and run to the fountain machine. You're filling up your 44oz fat boy cup with Coke and start to chug some of it right away before you pay. As you drink a fourth of it, you then refill and then go pay for it. I'm sure some reading are guilty of that. I know I am. Some of my buddies give me a hard time on the gas station trips for this, but I don't see it as anything major. As the commercial motto goes, "Not a felony in all 50 states".

Did Easter treat everyone fine? Mine was great, no complaints on my end. As usual, and it's a regular topic around the blog, Cadbury eggs. It's only the greatest candy ever, nothing else can even compare. I loaded up huge on them this season, although I'm pacing myself on eating them a bit. I haven't ate as much junk food through the week like I normally would. Also, Easter is also a time for church-going people to do their thing. I never preach about religion in here and don't intend to this time, but I'll go another route..



I hit up Easter mass early Sunday morning. It's been a long time since I've hit up the Sunday morning mass for Easter because usually it's Saturday evenings (Catholic) for the vigil. It always is funny to see bums you haven't seen all year show up on holidays. You didn't even know they were part of the church anymore, but they want to come a few times a year and still claim to be part about. To each his own, but Easter is a quality time. I was at Monongah for this service and the singing level compared to my regular church is not even a comparison. My home church could be in the running for the worst singing congregation there is, bar none. I'm going in a direction than I wanted, so I better get back on track to my church question. People always say that it's not right to check out chicks at church. Come on now, the rest of you dirty guys can't say you don't do the same. You get the dirties dressing up big time for Easter and you see some sights, that's just how it goes, part of the deal and it can't hurt matters.

I was eating some Jelly Belly jellybeans the other day. You know the ones I'm talking about. It's the brand with the wacky flavors. I'm not a fan of wild flavors and trying different things with candy. Make it simple, I'm easy to please. I bit into one the other day and it was popcorn flavored? You kidding me? Seriously? I like popcorn, jelly beans aren't too bad either, but together? A huge thumbs down from me, that's not a good combo and it was worse than it sounds. They might as well have a roadkill flavored bean. These remind me of the candies that Harry Potter and his crew ate on the Hogwarts Express, it was that far out there.



I was talking to the great Corndog on Yahoo the other day. He was bored and was telling me he was just going through local chicks on MySpace for no reason just to be nosy. Good to know I'm not the only one who does that. I think most people who have the MySpace craze spend half their time looking at people they don't even know. I haven't delved into the Facebook action yet. I know I'm years behind that, but it'd just be something else I'd get ate up with and I'm already ate up on the internet enough. Corndog busts out this gem on us about girls in West Virginia: "I wish all the girls around here weren't alcoholics." Wise words from a dude you just have to respect. He tells it how it is and I couldn't agree more. He also made another funny mention. He says on the front page, you'll see the girls claim they don't drink and party. Then you click on their pics and they're out at some smoke infested filthy bar, being half naked and obliterated drunk. Yeah, that's who I want to bring home, sign me up for that trash, not for me. Not for Corndog either.

A quick sleeping update. For some reason, people like hearing about my weird hours, I'm not sure why either. But if it's what the people demand, I'll update it every so often for no other reason than that. Last Friday night, after no naps the week before, 12 hours of sleep. I went to bed at 10:45 PM on a Friday night, who does that? I did and I wake up at 10:45 AM, all refreshed and ready for a marathon or something. Then the next night, I'm up till 4:30 AM, not too bad for my standards, but I had to wake up early for church. I wake up at 8:00 AM and roll out of the house at 8:30 on a few hours of sleep. Then I come home from church and sleep from 10:30 until 2:00. I eat at 3:00, a nice circle there. Also, believe it or not, I was in bed all this week before 12:30, that's improvement.



This weekend, it's the Super Bowl. How so? The Super Bowl of wrestling is what I'm talking about. If you're a wrestling fan or not, you know all about WrestleMania and I'm getting excited for the festivities. I used to get every single pay per view for years, but I've slacked way back now on that. I'd get a lot more, but most of my crew tapped out on wrestling and aren't fans anymore. I'm still as big of a fan as ever, but I don''t need to be paying $40 a month for it. This Sunday is an exception though. It's pricey, but it's 4 hours of the biggest wrestling spectacle of the year. On stunning HD, it's a whopping $70, that's just nuts. Regular TV is less, but that's a tough decision to make. HD is definitely worth it to me, it's that good, but we'll see. Time for quick predictions while I'm at it:

WWE Championship Triple Threat Match: Randy Orton (Champion) vs Triple H vs John Cena. I'm going a different route here. I say we get a swerve and Orton retains somehow. I know it's always cliche for the "good" guy to always get the win to end Mania, but stranger things have happened.

World Heavyweight Title: Edge (Champion) vs Undertaker. Taker's 15-0 streak at Mania is in question here. I can't see him losing, so Taker will be your new champ.



Floyd Mayweather vs Big Show. The big drawing card for the mainstream media is this match. We get a midget in a sense in Mayweather against a guy that is 7'0"/400lbs in a boxing match. No way Show wins this one.

Flair vs Shawn Michaels. If Flair loses, his career is over. This is THE match I'm most looking forward to. I know Flair is ancient, but he's still my boy and I think this match will be pretty good. After Monday's in-ring segment between these two, if that doesn't get you amped up, Mountain Dew style, then I'm not sure what can. Down goes Flair in this one, in a bloody mess.

Money in the Bank Ladder Match. Due to Jeff Hardy being a druggie and getting suspended, he's no longer in this match. He was the big favorite to win this thing, but not anymore. I like a lot of wrestlers in this one, but 3 have no chance (Benjamin, Morrison, and Carlito). That leaves us with CM Punk, Jericho, Kennedy, and MVP. The smart thinking makes everyone want to take Jericho. I'd like to see Punk or MVP get the win, but I'll still pick Jericho.

Batista vs "Umanga". Please please, give Umaga a big push. Let him beat this guy who can't wrestle, but I figure Batista will win and then act all tough and roar like a lion.



Finlay vs JBL: Belfast Brawl. I look for this to be a real good physical battle. Finaly is going to make the slow JBL look like a million bucks. Finlay takes the win here.

BunnyMania Lumberjack Match: Ashley & Maria vs Beth Phoenix & Melina. This match is basically to hype up Maria showing her naked self in Playboy. I've seen the pics already. She looks nice, but nothing we haven't seen before. Playboy doesn't do a whole lot to me, gotta do more than just lay there naked. Not that I won't look at it, but there's a lot better along that same lines to look at if you ask me, you know what I mean. Ashley and Maria win.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: I never know if these links work if I don't have the direct link, but this seems to work on my end, so we'll get her out there to view: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=56371

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: Unforgivable #1 - "Go up there and just give me a chicken sandwich with some waffle fries!" http://youtube.com/watch?v=0dJu1Jj7VTw



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try birthdays for Friday, March 28th. Former Red Sox player and always on the Hall of Fame bubble, Jim Rice, he starts us off with 55. Model Kathy Ireland, 45 already, wow. "Salt" of Salt-N-Pepa fame, she's doing it for her 44th. Basketball analyst, Kenny "The Jet" Smith, 43. Freddie Prinze, Jr, who a few people said I look a bit like, 32. Celeb comparisons are always funny to me. James Van Der Beek of Dawson's Creek and "Mox" from Varsity Blues, 31.

2. Today's Fun Fact: Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants.

3. I was watching Idol with Cork and his girl Kristen last week. Somehow, something got me and Kristen talking about The Monkees. Out of nowhere, I figured I'd download a Monkees CD and we were all about it. They're goofy, but it's not too bad at all for some 1960s jams. Who else listens to gangsta rap and then the next day puts in some Monkees? Yep, I have too much time on my hands.

"Your momma ain't name you no damn Barack."

We have a lot of action to talk about in this post. It's the height of randomness and as I'm typing this, I'd like to wish everyone a Happy St. Patrick's Day. It's a meaningless holiday for the most part, but with me being a green guy due to Boston Celtics basketball and Notre Dame football in my blood, it means even more. I have more green clothes than should be possible, but that's how I roll. As Felisha always tells me, I'm one of few people who can rock out the green and not look like a total idiot. I guess that's a compliment, I'll take whatever I can get. So what does this blog hold in store for everyone today? You get my thoughts on peeling an orange, the NCAA 64 Tourney, fantasy baseball, Wii online, Super Smash Bros Brawl, The Moment of Truth, and much much more.



You know one thing that has always amazed me? I guess this will show how much time is on my hands, but you've all tried it before, trust me. I'll set it up. You're eating an orange and peeling away at it, right? Have you ever peeled an orange in one solid straight peel and it's all one piece when you're done? It's harder than you think. Another thing to try it on would be a pack of Spree candies. The long roll, start ripping at the paper and then going around till you get to the last piece. If, at the end, you have one solid string of paper, you're the man. Cork always tries this on road trips, but I'm usually horrible at it. One time he got it and we were pumped. Yep, we're morons. I've yet to get either task accomplished, so I guess I'm a failure at the orange/Spree game.

Last week was one of the first weeks in a long time that I had solid sleep during a work week. Usually I get a few ok nights of sleep by going to bed at a normal hour and then I'm up till way late on the others. Last week, for the most part, I went to bed at reasonable hours and wasn't tired come weekend. Anyways, Friday rolls around and I woke up that day at 6:00 AM for work. I do my thing and then come home to chill. As I'm doing my thing, I'm up all night playing video games and being online, my usual. No surprise there. I ended up going to bed on Saturday afternoon at 12:30 PM. 30½ hours, that's me being stupid, but oh well. I wake up at 4:15 PM or so, get a quick bite to eat and get back online. Then I go workout at 7:00 PM, so I made myself useful if nothing else.



The Moment of Truth. I watched this for the first time the other night on FOX. It was on before Idol, so I figured I'd try it out. It's one of those lie detector shows, but with a twist. I didn't think I'd watch much of it, but it's over the top, so I was hooked after seeing a few questions. This dude had to admit in front of his family such things if he hooked up with his friends' wives, his wife's sisters, drug questions, and everything else. Way too many commercials though started getting me mad. He ended up telling this stuff and quit at $100,000.

New video game time and what I loaded up on is Super Smash Bros Brawl for Wii. If you have a Wii, this is a MUST buy for any age. I'm telling you, you'll be consumed in this game. If you were a fan of the older versions, you'll like this one even more. The best part about it, you can hook right up to battle others online with this as well. If you have a wireless connection, you don't even need to buy an adapter. It'll recognize it immediately. I've had a Wii since Day 1 and didn't realize I didn't need any kind of adapter to get online, doh. I battled Walz on Saturday night through the online setup and we were loving it. My favorite characters are the guys that have speed: Link, Pit, Starfox, and even Mario can surprise some. The big burly characters don't do anything at all for me. I'm not sure you want a piece of me when I get Pit out to regulate and crush skulls. Cork stopped out on Monday night to check it out and he was a huge fan as well, we took on bums online. If you do the online deal and have a Wii, add me with this code: 4214-4784-4339



So that brings us to Sunday and that gave us a ton of sports action. In the afternoon, we had the infamous A#BL fantasy baseball draft. This is the #basketball crew and it's our keeper league that I've talked about recently. 18 men strong and the most competitive baseball league I've been in by FAR, free or pay leagues both. The draft took us about 4 hours in mIRC and the chat alone is worth it to me. Commish Kasher rocked it out in style by having everything organized and putting together another impressive league. I'm sure you're bored to hear what my roster is this year. If not, you get it anyways. Ladies and gentlemen, this is youuurrrrrr St. Paul Apostles!

1B: Prince Fielder (MIL)
1B: Daric Barton (OAK)

2B: Brandon Phillips (CIN)

SS/2B: Ryan Theriot (CHI-NL)
SS/2B/3B: Yunel Escobar (ATL)

3B: David Wright (NY-NL)

OF: Matt Kemp (LA)
OF: Justin Upton (ARI)
OF: Kosuke Fukudome (CHI-NL)
OF: Randy Winn (SF)
OF: Felix Pie (CHI-NL)

SP: Johan Santana (NY-NL)
SP: John Maine (NY-NL)
SP: Hiroki Kuroda (LA)
SP: Kevin Slowey (MIN)

RP: Matt Capps (PIT)
RP: Raffy Perez (CLE)
RP: Heath Bell (SD)
RP: Joey Devine (OAK)



As is always my strategy, I don't want any older injury prone bums. In that case, I usually draft more on potential and youngsters that have recently broke through the barrier and are now officially on the rise. I went with Justin Upton (who I'm a huge fan of) of the DBacks with the #9 pick in the draft. Remember, 90 players are already gone before we even begin drafting due to the keeper side of things, so we're talking hardcore fans doing this league. Unfortunately, as I've said before, my area features very few true baseball fans that really know their stuff. My outfield is a little suspect, but it has definite appeal on potential if they do their thing. I did something I also usually never do and that's to get a relief crew. I like my closers and also think I have a few nice middle relievers, look out for Heath Bell.

Now it's time to unveil my NCAA 64 Tourney basketball picks. I'm sure I'll get rocked since I pick too many upsets, but it wouldn't be fun going another route. I won't keep everyone too long with this, but I'll list my Elite 8 and then break it down to who is going to hoist the trophy in a drunken parade the next day in their hometown. My Elite 8: North Carolina versus Louisville, Kansas versus Wisconsin, Memphis versus Texas, and UCLA versus Duke. I then have Louisville, Kansas, Texas, and Duke in my Final Four. That means that I'm going with Texas over Louisville, 82-73. There you have it, book that in Vegas so you can lose your money. Thursday starts the action, time to gear up!



I'm going to end this top section up with another Kasher find. He's all over the blog this week. It gave me today's real life LOL and those are rare. Considering I'm sitting by myself in my room and just started busting out laughing, you'll see what I mean. This from XXL magazine, which I'm a subscriber to for whatever that's worth. It's an interview with rapper DMX. Enjoy and have fun busting out laughing:

XXL: Are you following the presidential race?
DMX: Not at all.

XXL: You’re not? You know there’s a Black guy running, Barack Obama and then there’s Hillary Clinton.
DMX: His name is Barack?!

XXL: Barack Obama, yeah.
DMX: Barack?!

XXL: Barack.
DMX: What the fuck is a Barack?! Barack Obama. Where he from, Africa?

XXL: Yeah, his dad is from Kenya.
DMX: Barack Obama?

XXL: Yeah.
DMX: What the fuck?! That ain’t no fuckin’ name, yo. That ain’t that nigga’s name. You can’t be serious. Barack Obama. Get the fuck outta here.

XXL: You’re telling me you haven’t heard about him before.
DMX: I ain’t really paying much attention.

XXL: I mean, it’s pretty big if a Black…
DMX: Wow, Barack! The nigga’s name is Barack. Barack? Nigga named Barack Obama. What the fuck, man?! Is he serious? That ain’t his fuckin’ name. Ima tell this nigga when I see him, “Stop that bullshit. Stop that bullshit” [laughs] “That ain’t your fuckin’ name.” Your momma ain’t name you no damn Barack.

XXL: So you’re not following the race. You can’t vote right?
DMX: Nope.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/ilovetaneish

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: Kasher comes through again. This is a setup of this chick getting regular bum guys to help her with computer problems. http://www.bofunk.com/video/6537/chick_getting_some_computer_help.html



3 Quick Thangs:

1. How about some birthdays for Wednesday, March 19th? A pretty sad list for the most part, but it still needs to be done. Actress Glenn Close, she's 61. Bruce Willis is throwing f-bombs for his 58th. I'm actually going to stop there. This list is so pathetic it might be the worst day evarrrr. Check for yourself if you don't believe me: http://www.brainyhistory.com/daysbirth/birth_march_19.html

2. For the wrestling fans, how great was Santino Marella this week on RAW? Stealing Jared's sub and then his mic work, incredible. Excellent segment.

3. Today's fact to feast on: If all the blood vessels in your body were laid end to end, they would reach about 60,000 miles. What?? I guess it's true, I won't argue the internet.

Tattoo Chick Vs. Aussie Boy!

It was 70 degrees here on Monday and as I write this, we have some snow coming down. Gotta love how things go around this time of year. That ends up getting bums sick and then the next guy gets sick and so on. Last week I had the fun sinus infection and all of that. I was able to deal though after taking a day off ball and missing some days of working out which I hated. Anyways, Sunday night rolls around. The past 2 nights of the weekend I had slept 10 hours and rocked it out. So I go to bed Sunday and wake up around 4:00 AM just puking my guts up. Just what you wanted to hear, but that's how it goes. I then go back to bed for a bit, wake up at 6:00 and then head off to work without missing a beat. That's a machine. Still, no fun having my schedule all screwed up with a little sickness, but I'm not down with it anymore.



We're down to the Final 12 on Idol, 6 dudes and 6 chicks. What I'll do is give a quick opinion on each of the people left and go from there. As far as the bunch I was rooting for, my girl Asia'h got kicked out and told to never show her face there again, but Chikezie is still hanging on. I am glad that Noriega is off the show though. You can't have that last name and be a little girl like he was, I'm sorry, but he's a bum. I know the Idol haters won't like this next section, but it's going in regardless. I think with the nicknames and me not writing a book on each can still keep the interest. And here we go with the final bunch:

Skunk Hair Chick: She was on the verge of getting booted last week, but bounced back and was Simon's favorite this time around. She's different and has the mean voice to help her out. Her look and style could keep her around for a while longer.

Brooke: This chick is like 25, but looks 40. She's a cute chick, but looks more like a mom than someone that age. She does the guitar and keyboard thing a good bit. I see talent here, but I'm not a big fan.

Tattoo Chick: She's the real deal. It's the Irish chick with an arm sleeve tat if you were wondering on which. Vocally, nobody can touch this girl in my opinion. She should go a long way.



Kristy MMA Chick: She's cute and has the country thing as her style. She also trains for mixed martial arts, so she might be able to bust up the rest of these other girls, even if she doesn't look like a fighter. I predicted her to be gone this week, but she's still here for some reason. Maybe because she likes to hang out of her top, even though she really doesn't have much.

Midget Chick: This is the little Filipino girl, Ramiele. She can't be any more than 4'10" I wouldn't imagine. I dig her look though. She's tiny, but has a huge voice. She's always the biggest cryer of the bunch, she goes way over the top when someone gets kicked off the show, it's messed up, but funny in the same way.

Syesha: This girl has some major talent I think. She can sing really good (like I know anything about singing) and looks really nice. Supposedly she started singing when she was 3 years old. 3? Come on now, let these kids grow up and do normal kid things for a while before pushing them into that.

Chikezie Eze: Yep, straight out of Inglewood and he's even had a blog topic in his honor. Always decked out in a pimp suit and he goes the route of pimpin' music. I thought he was a goner this week, but was glad to see him still around.

Little David: No matter what this guy does, he should be a shoe-in to be a serious contender. The little girls are creaming themselves over this kid, while he puts Paula in tears, so all ages love this little dude it seems. I figure since chicks are a big majority of the votes, he should do fine.

David Cook: He's the rocker of the dudes side and comes out with his guitar to do his thing. I think he's unique enough and depending on the song, can make a name for himself. He seems to be comfortable out there on stage instead of being scared to death.



Hernandez: This is the guy all over the news. The former stripper and people are making a big deal out of it. Like we haven't had crackheads and all sorts of characters on before. As far as this show goes, the dude can sing.

Fidel Castro: Another guy that has his own look. It's a whitey with huge thick dreads. My odds are on him to be the first guy busted for weed off of this show, but he seems like a likeable kid. I just think there's more to him than the innocent look he portrays.

Aussie Boy: My favorite to win this thing. I think he's the Tattoo Chick of the dudes, on a different level. Maybe that's just me, who knows.

I want something to rant on, so I'll just go random. It may offend some people, but so be it, just stating what I think. One thing that fires me up and some people might disagree with me, deals with pregnant chicks. No, not what you're thinking. It's the girls that hook up with some bum and act like he's the greatest thing ever and there are no worries. They're not even a couple. Then the next thing, she gets pregnant and acts like the world is collapsing all around her, bawls her eyes out like a little baby and goes psycho. Her and the dude should've thought about that long before fooling around, but you see it all too often. I don't get it. Am I one of the few that is weird and would freak out if I got a chick pregnant or even the thought of it? I thought they told us that when were like in 6th grade to be all safe and stuff, but none of these filthy girls (and dudes) care until babies start popping up. Oh well I guess. Gotta learn the hard way. Imagine that.



How's the books been treating me lately? I finally finished Harry Potter 7. I'm years behind everyone else reading that series, but glad I did. Going in, I never expected that I'd like any of those books. Once you start though, it's like Lindsay Lohan and her crack, you just gotta do it. I really liked the last book, but it's tough for me to pick a favorite. I'm still partial to the earlier books because it's more simple and you can get attached more. But then again, on the bigger books, there's so much detail that everything is broken down for you and it's great that way too. If you're one of the few like me who have never read Harry before, go out and start now, you won't be disappointed.

Now it's time for new books. As I type this, I recently finished up A Lion's Tale by Chris Jericho. It has to be one of the best wrestling books I've ever read and I've read a bunch. The stories Jericho tells are excellent and keeps you wanting more. I'm biased towards anything old school ECW and that was my section of the book that I thought was golden. Now when I'm done with Jericho, it's time to try another wrestling book, this one not so much mainstream. The book is called Extremely Strange and it's by a wrestler named JR Benson. This thing gets a ton of hype through the wrestling fans who know their stuff. If it's messed up drug stories you want, it has more than enough, if it's backstage environments that you cherish, it has plenty of that too. I'm not sure what it is, but something about reading about how screwed up many wrestlers' lives are and all of the drugs they get mangled on is interesting to a non-druggie like myself. It's not for kiddies, but you have to check out this review which is one of many like it. The book sounds way over the top, which has to make for a good read:

http://www.wrestlingobserver.com/wo/news/headlines/default.asp?aID=21538

Missy Hyatt's review: http://www.wrestlingobserver.com/wo/news/headlines/default.asp?aID=22279

And if you're curious and want to order the book, hit up JR Benson's site: http://jrbenson.com



I know you're just all holding onto your chairs wondering how League Freak went. I'm about to break it down, whether you want to hear or not. The draft went really smooth and this is what I ended up deciding upon. Here are yourrrrr E-Town Junkies!

1. Miguel Cabrera: 3B (DET)
2. Brandon Phillips: 2B (CIN)
3. Cole Hamels: SP (PHI)
4. Carlos Zambrano: SP (CHI-NL)
5. Adrian Gonzalez: 1B (SD)
6. Delmon Young: OF (MIN)
7. JJ Hardy: SS (MIL)
8. Matt Capps: RP (PIT)
9. JR Towles: C (HOU)
10. Matt Kemp: OF (LA)
11. Justin Upton: OF (ARI)
12. Jason Isringhausen: RP (STL)
13. Ryan Theriot: 2B (CHI-NL)
14. Tom Gorzelanny: SP (PIT)
15. Billy Butler: 1B/DH (KC)
16. Homer Bailey: SP (CIN)
17. Felix Pie: OF (CHI-NL)
18. Brian Wilson: RP (SF)
19. Hiroki Kuroda: SP (LA)
20. Andy LaRoche: 3B (LA)
21. Jason Bartlett: SS (TB)

I'm happy with my bunch there. Most are really young and that's usually my strategy in fantasy leagues. Out of my 21 players drafted, only 2 (Izzy and Kuroda) are older than me, that's messed up. Even more strange is when I see these kids that were born on my roster from 1987 and 1986. Born in 1987 (Upton) and this year he'll make more money than I will in my entire life. How's that to feast on? Anyways, I like that I have at least one backup for every spot except catcher. Miggy Cabrera is a fat boy, but dude gets it done in a major way. I think I'm really solid in the infield, minus seeing what JR "For Who The Bell" Towles can ever do. Props to ManDingo for that nickname. I think Phillips, who I also have in A#BL is the real deal since he can do it all. The outfield is loaded with potential and that's always a fine line to walk. Not a single one of my outfielders has proven themselves on the major league level, but I really like all of their games. The starting pitching staff I have brings pure smoke. Just like my batters are led by a fatty, so are my pitchers and that guy is Carlos Zambrano, but my ace is a skinny dude named Cole. Maybe they can be my version of Rob & Big. This guy (Zambrano) is a tub of fat, but he can just sling the ball and he also guarantees World Series berths and they don't happen, he's a character. Cole is no joke if he can stay healthy, plus his wife is way hot. I don't have too much on relief though as I'm relying on a Pirate and Giant for saves, shoot me right now. I had to pick a few Bucs though so I can watch them in person and on TV both.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/OutsideofSociety78

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: How can ya go wrong with ping pong clips? http://youtube.com/watch?v=ga6zAEB9fOM



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try our birthdays for Monday, March 10th. I don't have anyone personal on that date, so if I missed ya, just give me a cussing. Chuck Norris, feared by all, he's now 68, whoa. I knew he was old, but dang. Shannon Tweed, 1982 Playboy Playmate of the Year and B level softcore porn actress, 51. She also has a few kids with KISS member Gene Simmons. Actress Sharon Stone hits the Big 50. Former NFL baller, Rod Woodson, 43. Eva Herzigova, the Wonderbra chick and most have seen her naked, 35. US gold medalist gymnast, Shannon Miller, she's 31. Singer Carrie Underwood 25.

2. From the College Humor dudes, we have the Nintendo Wii Rejected Games Concepts: http://www.iamboredr.com/media/1192/Nintendo_Wii_Rejected_Game_Concepts/

3. I know you're sitting there bored. What to do? Go play some Monkey Kick Off. It doesn't seem like much, but it's not a bad time killer for a few and you'll get hooked possibly. http://www.totebo.com/monkey-kick-off.php

"Cause I'm A Ruthless Villain.."

February is in the books and the people are getting restless. Restless for what, I'm not quite sure yet, but we have them stirring either way. This edition will feature the following: Fruit farmers wizzing on their pickings, getting shot in the butt, hot nurses, Harry Potter is a gangster, Idol, and a lot of new CDs. And of course that's not all, it's just your quick preview to get the feet wet. Now it's time to dive in..



I've been on a big fruit kick of as late. I've always hit up a lot of fruit, but even more than usual the past month or so. I was in the kitchen hanging out on Thursday and eating some green grapes. I opened the package up and started tearing into them. My parents are big on washing the fruit off before eating it. It makes sense and most people would probably do that. Dad was saying how the fruit pickers are out there on the farms just wizzing onto the stuff we eat and we should wash it off. That cracked me up. Besides, it gets sprayed down enough over the time it gets to the store and the stores always spray it down too.

Last week I was due to get some new DVDs. I'm wondering if this next combination has been done before. I like my chances of no on this one. So what did I buy? Last Tuesday was when American Gangster came out, so I had to get that masterpiece. Again, if you haven't seen this movie yet, all hope may not be lost, because you can get it now. I've hyped it up enough in here, that's for sure. To go with that, I also bought the first two Harry Potter DVDs. The guy checking me out probably didn't know what type of person I was. As we say in the blog, I kept him on his feet and had him thinking all night on that one I'm sure. You get a kiddie movie mixed in with a movie blowing off heads and throwing f-bombs every 2.3 seconds, thumbs up from me.



Speaking of Harry, what'd I think? I realize I'm way behind everyone else on this series, but at least I'm still getting it. As far as the book goes, in Harry 7, I'm fairly close to wiping out that boy. Just about 100 more pages and I'm good as gold. With the movies, after reading the books, I didn't have high hopes. Most of your movies can't come anywhere even near what the actual book was like. However, I was definitely surprised by the Harry 1 DVD, it delivered. I've heard other people say the movies aren't that good, but after the first one, it's starting out very nice.

With March here, it's time to get pumped for fantasy baseball. I'm in two big leagues this year and they are both going to be competitive. I'm not in a money league for baseball, but ironically our free leagues are so tight that it's just as good. Unfortunately, in my area, it's tough to get a hardcore group of baseball fans that would stick with it. We have a handful, but that's about it who are true baseball guys. Then again, I'm a weird one that likes baseball much better than football, where everyone else seems to bow down to everything associated with football. I like football, but you know. And as everyone knows, basketball is by far my #1 sport to both follow and play. Anyways, I have 2 upcoming drafts.



One is a newly created league, League Freak with the commish being The_Freak as you would guess. It is a 14-man league and we draft on March 8th. Not many care, but I'm still going to list the people involved in this one. We have The_Freak, TheAnswer, Uncle Wilbur, Posey, Cork, MrsAnswer, Bono, Duce, Neon, ManDingo, Duce's Bro, myself, and 2 boys of The_Freak's. This one starts from scratch and isn't a keeper league, so that'll be fun for something different.

The other? It's the infamous American Baseball League (A#BL). This is ran from the blog's video producer, Kasher himself. This one features a whopping 18 people and it's a keeper league in existence since 2003. Both of these leagues have a lot of overlap, but once again, we'll break down who is part of this extravaganza: Kasher, DerekHood, Cork, Trev, Walz, ManDingo, TyLaw, Neon, Duce, Dack, Kris3, Dom, TMac, Blahah, Uncle Wilbur, Big Play Ray, Big Arlo, and myself. It's not even March and we're around 200 posts on our message board already, we get it done. In our basketball league, the A#BA, we have over 1500 posts from the season. No other Yahoo leagues can compete with us, I dare them to. My five keepers this year are Johan Santana, David Wright, Prince Fielder, Brandon Phillips, and Matt Kemp. The first four of those I feel are true absolute studs, so I'm ready to rock out a good draft on March 16th.



I'm recovered from my sickness of last week. Part of those was from my kids practically throwing up on me at work and the other half was getting a few hours of sleep a night I'm sure. I roll to the doctor on Friday after work since I was a zombie that day. Two good things while I was there. One is that I didn't have to wait at all, that's rare. Two, the nurses were hotties this time, how can you go wrong with that? I go in to get my blood pressure checked and all of that. Not one, but two nurses they send in to do that tough job, hah. I didn't mind though, half sick or not, that doesn't hurt things to look at some filthies. Then the doc was in for about 2.3 seconds and asked if I wanted a shot or just medicine instead. I asked what he recommended and he said the shot works instantly. I said, sign me up. Shots don't bother me at all like some people. I remember one time getting a poison ivy shot and this dumb chick broke the needle off in me. I just sat there and looked as stuff was shooting everywhere and she freaked. And you think I'm making this stuff up, but I'm not. This time,a third nurse comes, who also looks good, and does the honor of giving me a shot in the butt. She was instantly drawn to the Italian machismo oozing out of me as she gave that shot. Well, I'd like to think that anyways. Whatever it takes to get better.

We're now booting people on Idol left and right. This week, we booted 4 more, 2 dudes and 2 chicks. At the moment, I'm still rooting for Chikezie and my girl Asia'h. Who I really think has a shot to win on each side? I'm going with Aussie Boy on the dudes and Tattoo Chick on the chicks. Kid David has the chicks going wild though and makes Paula cry, so he should go far as well. The girls on Thursday, were way over the top drama queens, it was a mess. The Alaina girl that got booted, she broke down and said she wasn't gonna sing. Then she ended up singing, weird. I always like how the other contestants act like the world has ended when someone loses. Hey buddy, that helps you last at least another week, be happy. I'm sure they're friends, but there's only one winner and you have to be somewhat ruthless, Eazy-E style. Or as Eazy rightfully said in Ruthless Villain featuring MC Ren:

Cause I'm a ruthless villain,
Cold tearin' shit up,
Don't come on my face,
Pumpin' no kind of junk,
Eazy-E's in control,
And if you press your luck,
I'll smoke you like that,
And won't give a fuck.

I haven't put any old rap lyrics in here in a good while, so it was time. That leads us into newer things. We're due for some more CD updates. We're going all rap in this one, just bringing it with all sorts.

B.G. & The Chopper City Boyz: We Got This. This is mainly BG's boys doing the work, but he's in some of this as well. I'm big on the Louisiana style of rap anyways, so I wanted to pick it up. He's been under the radar lately, but I feel he's really good lyrically, one of the better ones of that bunch from the original Hot Boys.

Crucial Conflict: Planet Crucon. I've been waiting on Crucial to come out with something new for ages. They were one of my favorites in the mid 90s and this one showed why that is still true. For those who weren't around for their first run, load up on these guys from Chicago, very underrated. If you're into the quick raps with some added meanness, you can't go wrong here at all.

Jim Jones: Harlem's American Gangster. Stolen from Jay-Z's pull on the great movie mentioned above, Jim goes at Jay-Z a ton in this one. To me, and I like them, but all of the Dipset guys are the same. They don't distinguish from each other as much as they should. Not that it's bad, but it just seems like deja vu all over again.

Kool G Rap: Half A Klip. We're going with a legend here. You want some viciousness and straight street rap? This is what you're wanting to load up on for sure. Not a long CD, but it gets to the point and does its job, pick it up.

Pastor Troy: Attitude Adjuster. Troy is a guy you either love or hate. There's no in between. He's from the mean streets of the ATL, but doesn't do the club thing that so many other ATL guys do, so I'm down with him. He's gritty and goes at it, screaming half the time. Some can't get past his screaming, but it works in a mean way if you ask me. This one though, he impresses with more lyrical content. Songs to pick up from this CD? I'm Hot, Put Him On The Scope, and Dom would like to recommend For My Soldiers.



Sumthin Terrible: Turf Tested, Hood Approved. This is one of those times where I don't know the artists, but it's worth a try, what can it hurt? They're from Northern Cali, so of course I'm interested in rap from that area. The title sounded rough enough to see what it was all about. I haven't listened to this one yet except for a few tracks, but it seems worthy.

Young Gunz: Rapid Fire. I liked these guys a lot when Jay-Z brought them out a while back. They don't get a lot of love and I'm not even positive they're still with the Roc. They're now under Young Gunz Media as their label, so I'm not sure if that's a branch of the Roc or if they are on their own. Either way, the label isn't going to change my mind on these guys, they bring some talent and I liked this CD. Pretty crazy this is their fifth album and they're both only 23 years old. Yep, that makes me feel old.

Yukmouth: Million Dollar Mouthpiece. More Bay Area rap for the fans to feast on. If you go way back, Yuk was part of the Luniz. He's also a protege of my boy Dru Down, one of my all time picks. As an added bonus for me, Dru Down is on the track East Oakland. Devin The Dude and Crooked I also appear on this. Apparently this CD was 5 years in the making, did Yuk deliver as he usually does? He brings about the unique voice.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/nessquick

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: We're now ready for Kasher's segment and this one is genius. It's disturbing and something you won't want to watch at work or around too many people however, but it's downright funny. If you're a SuperBad fan, you'll know McLovin and his character. He's part of this vid entitled The Teabag Incident: http://spikedhumor.com/articles/144149/The-Teabag-Incident.html



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's start the month of March out right with our birthdays. Saturday, March 1st. Actor Alan Thicke of Growing Pains days, 61. Ron Howard, now director, but most know as Opie on The Andy Griffith Show, he's doing it for his 54th. Daisy Duke is also 54. NBA baller and a guy I always personally thank for my Heels winning the 1993 National Title, Chris Webber, Happy 35th. Zack of Saved By The Bell is now is 34. If that doesn't make my era feel old, I'm not sure what else will. We have a nice mix there, it's worthy of some mentions.

2. Here's today's weird stat: People who ride on roller coasters have a higher chance of having a blood clot in the brain. I guess I'm safe then from my brain exploding into 235 pieces.

3. I was driving home tonight and was behind this car at the stoplight. I'll end with the Potter kick since half the people reading hate that stuff, but I like it, so it's going in. I saw this bumper sticker that says "Republicans for Voldemort". Good stuff right there. I'm a Democrat and don't care one way or another if someone is Dem or Republican, that bumper sticker is creative. Has to be funny to the Potter fans. Also, thanks to Uncle Wilbur for the pics he sent on an email that we used this week.

Dodging Puke

How'd Valenine's Day treat the readers? Mine was the usual, more money in my pocket. Due to me rocking out the single life, there wasn't anyone that I had to spend on this year. I can handle that, less drama too. Now we have a big mix of nothing over the next month on the calendar. The rest of February surely doesn't have much. We're waiting around for March Madness and what else does March hold? Easter isn't until late March. We trek through the winter, with topics to pop up that we least expect.



Tuesday at work was interesting to say the least. By the time the day was over, my room was labeled the Hospital Ward. As a teacher, you're around sick little kids all the time. That's no biggie, right? You just deal with it and have a tolerance not to get sick from them in most cases. I don't have a lot of kids in my classes, but around my area, people are getting down with the sickness so to speak. First, I had this kid who had missed the past week for the flu and bronchitis. He shows up today and is a mess. He grinds through one subject and then has no energy left and starts to get sick again. The next is a kid that didn't look good as soon as he walked in. He was in a hurry and asked to go to the bathroom. A few minutes later, he's back and says he threw up all over the place. Then he runs back down there and it's out of both ends. Just what you wanted to know I'm sure, but it sets things up for our story.

The same kid is coughing, spitting up junk and waiting on a ride to come pick him up in an hour. So that means he'll hang in my room for an hour. He starts to lay down and then asks if he can borrow the garbage can. Great. So he goes into the corner and kind of hangs out, puking up his guts. Then he goes to the bathroom again and says a lot of it got on the floor, plus he needs a change of pants. You kidding me? Yep, that's where your tax dollars go to for the teachers. We dodge puke all day long. A third kid was medicated up fairly well and he was a zombie after a change of his usual pattern. So he was zonked for most of the day. I usually don't write many stories about work, but if I don't get sick from all of this, I'll be a machine.



Speaking of being a machine, it's time to revisit my sleeping schedule. I'll start from last week and lead up till earlier this week. Tuesday night, I roll to bed at 2:00 AM and wake up at 6:00 AM. Wednesday night, I go to bed at 2:00 and wake up at 6:00 again. Thursday night, I tap out at 2:30 and wake up at 6:00 again. So Friday I'd come home and get a big nap, right? Nope, for some reason I toughed it out. Due to that, I'd go to bed early, correct? Wrong again, I end up staying up all night and going to bed at 8:30 AM. The next day I sleep till 2:00, only 5½ hours, not what I wanted, but it happens. Saturday night, I roll to bed at 3:30 and wake up at 12:00 to play ball. Finally a decent night of sleep. Sunday night and I'm wanting to start the work week off with a normal bed time. What do I do? 3:00 AM and wake up at 6:00, doh. I come home and get a nap? No, I go workout and have a pretty good one. Monday night I go to bed at 12:30, not bad at all. Tuesday evening, I nap from 4:00-5:30. I'm ready to rock. You know the moral, I don't have to even say it.

I'm a big Idol fan, too big for most reading probably since most don't care. What I don't like is all of these 2 hour episodes. One a week may be ok, but not twice. Then on Thursday, we get an hour long results show. I can imagine how the average bum fans would tune out when the hardcores are thinking it's a bit much. With that, I may cut back on the Idol opinions for a few weeks and let the chopping block come to get rid of some of these bums of the Final 24. From last week, my boy Josiah, the kid who quit school and lives in his car, he gets cut. I thought that would've been a classic story to follow through the season, plus he had talent, but the judges didn't think he was good enough. After the first week that made the cuts to 24, at this point, who am I rooting for? This will change a zillion times, but on the guys side I'm pulling for the infamous Chikezie Eze. On the girls, I'm going with the hottie known as Asia'h. Now it's time for me to pick what 2 guys and 2 girls get booted on Thursday night: Jason Yeager, Luke Menard, Amy Davis, and Kady Malloy.



One thing Asia'h did did last week that I wasn't big on was her hair. This will be a separate topic all together. Rant time! I don't know much about hairstyles and what the actual terms are, but you'll know what I'm talking about. Let's take a chick with long hair first off (my #1 turn-on probably). Then she takes the front of her hair and just throws that junk up to the middle and she looks like a rooster. You take the bangs or all of the front and just shove it up into a pile of mess. I don't get it, you see TONS of chick rocking this horrible look out and you get the hair stuck up with all you see is an ugly forehead. But why? I'm a simple guy when it comes to chick hair, leave it down and preferably straight. That brings us to Corndog..

He brought up a good idea the other day while we were chatting around. He said I should interview random bums or people I know and just go with a new theme every now and then. I should probably try that when I'm out of ideas. Either way, since we're talking about hair, Corndog wants to give the world some of his wisdom and expertise: "If a a girl is gonna be annoying, she better be really good looking". That's pretty good words to live by if you ask me. That's all free of charge from Corndog himself, he's gonna have to start charging soon.



You want something quick and easy to kill time? Well, for sports fans anyways that have too much time on their hands online. That would be a site called Cyberdunk. This was brought to our attention from none other than Dom of #basketball fame, straight out of Germany. Who would've guessed that a dude in the middle of nowhere in Shinnston would have people in Germany reading this thing? Aside from Dom, I also get a lot of regular feedback from Kristen, a Florida transplant who is now in Germany. Small world out there. Ok, enough rambling. I'm not sure how long the craze can last, but it's going pretty strong with my crew. It is a MMORPG, a Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. Basically, you create your own basketball player. You choose what country he's from, position, and then go into a draft. You are then drafted by a country's division. After that, there's a lot of things to do to build your player up. You set him up with contracts, gear, skills on the court, and go after being the man. Give it a try if you're a sports fan, it's strangely addicting even though it sounds simple.

I haven't done a CD update in here in a good while. I've been slacking in getting some new songs to the collection, but we have a small one to mention by having two new ones:



Raheem DeVaughn: Love Behind The Melody. If you're into pimpin' R&B, this guy from Newark, New Jersey is definitely worthy of checking out. The song he has out now that you've heard would be Woman. iTunes had it as their #1 single of the week at the end of January for whatever that's worth. I haven't heard the whole CD yet, but what I have, it's not too shabby at all. I know it's a week after Valentine's Day, but the ladies will appreciate it. Once again, this advice is free of charge. Raheem received a Grammy nomination for this year.

Lupe Fiasco: The Cool. Maybe you didn't get his first CD when it came around, but now is your chance to pick up this one. This Chicago cat features some smooth lyrics and stays away from going at people or being negative. I classify him as happy rap as me and my boys would say. He's real good though and creative, hopefully he starts to make a bigger name. His song last year, Kick Push, was nominated at most of the awards shows. As I type this, his current single Superstar is on TV now as the #1 song on BET's 106 & Park.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/larosered

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: I went back to the Lobstah archive to dig this up. It's from 2005 and credit goes to our video producer, Kasher: http://leenks.com/media432.htm



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try some birthdays for Friday, February 22nd. We start out with a basketball legend, Dr. J. He turns 58 on this day. I would've guessed a bit older. Golfer Vijay Singh, he's now 45. He's one of the best out there, but I always cracked up at his comparisons with Tiger. Get out of here, nobody can hold Tiger's jock. Former tennis stud little guy, Michael Chang, 36. It seems like he's been away for ages. How short a tennis career ends. Actress Drew Barrymore, 33, but has probably been through enough to be 80. I think she still looks real nice though. We'd also like to send the birthday wishes out to Cousin Ozzie, he's doing it big on the 23rd! Have a good one man!

2. Feeling all stuffed up? Here's one you'll have to try. I've probably mentioned it before in here, but I'm half sick at the moment (guess I'm not a machine like I was writing above) and don't remember. What you need to do is throw one of these bad boys into the shower with ya. It's a big tablet and it helps you breathe. I know, it sounds stupid, but it works. Shower Soothers: http://www.pfizerch.com/product.aspx?id=531

3. It's time to brush up on your skills. This fact is a historical one. Australia accounts for 5.3% of the world's land mass. Who leads? Asia with a cool 30%.

Chikezie Eze from Inglewooood!

Last week I was under deep pressure to get the blog out on a certain date from MrsAnswer on her birthday. I delivered with that, so this week I had to come back to my senses. It's time to relax and just go with the flow. Now that it's nearing upon 2 weeks, I'm having the fans demand more. It was slack time and I need to get the ball rolling again. I've already heard from Corndog and Carolina that are fired up, dedicated readers, so I best get to typing out something good, it's what they want. See, that's just a reason to get some characters into the blog. JK Rowling has nothing on me, you know you want to find out more on such people as Corndog and Carolina, so stay tuned.



I'm going to start out with a good story from my boy Clark. His uncle just finished up his degree and he either is writing a book or this is part of a paper he had to write. Growing up, my Dad (everyone knows him as Dude if you were wondering when ya read this section) was older than Clark's uncle, but they were around the same group of buddies and neighborhood. Hot Sam is my uncle when you get to that part for the non-locals who don't know the crew. First off, it makes it easier to write the blogs when people give me ideas. Most times I can think of something, but every now and then, I go into a brain freeze. That's where Clark comes into the mix, so props to him on sharing this story:

Clark (7:12:21 PM): Not much ... I have a story for ya
Clark (7:12:57 PM): My Uncle Pat just finished up a college degree to become a librarian and he just sent my mom a Word file called Ch. 1
Clark (7:13:43 PM): I'm not sure if he is writing a book or if this was part of an assignment he had due, but he talks about the Mahlon Street Gang ... and has a part in there about your dad
Clark (7:14:35 PM): It's about 14 lines, so I'll type in a sentence or two and let you read along ... let me know when you are ready
Me (7:14:43 PM): Go for it, that's great.
Clark (7:15:31 PM): Prelude ... he just got done taking about Johnny Bruce or otherwise known by his locally famous sobriquet of "Hot Sam"
Clark (7:16:36 PM): Dude is his older brother, and lucky for the rest of us he was about 7 years older and didn't hang around with us too much. He did pause long enough to teach us his rules of wiffle ball, touch football, and "Dude ball".
Clark (7:17:29 PM): Dude ball consisted of five or six of us younger guys lined up against a wall in a postage stamp size yard with our faces to a wall, while he would wing a ball at us.
Clark (7:18:10 PM): You were not allowed to peek. Dude's rule. Another one of Dude's pastimes was having us run up Mahlon Street while he shot at us with a BB gun.
Me (7:18:24 PM): Hah! That's classic right there.
Clark (7:18:50 PM): I was excused from this test of young manhood when my sister, Ann, came out and explained to Dude that he would not be using me for a target.
Clark (7:19:52 PM): He would ask my mother to go bird hunting with him, and one time when our front door was left open, he fired a shot into a white plastic planter in our front hall. He was the one who hung the unfortunate name of "Maynard: on David Riley.
Clark (7:20:35 PM): As I said earlier, lucky for us he was older and that he quit bothering with us about the time his parents sent him to Hargrave Military Academy
Clark (7:20:49 PM): Last part is a good one too ... here
Clark (7:21:41 PM): In the eighth grade, I had to do a report on a neighborhood hero as part of my preparation for the Golden Horseshoe test. I chose Dude. My mom suggested other people.
Me (7:22:12 PM): That end line is great.
Clark (7:22:33 PM): I thought it was great ... my mom sent it with Payton's Valentine's Day gift ... It's about 9 nine pages and just a snipit of a look into his past ...I thought you would enjoy.
Me (7:22:55 PM): That's blog style right there, sounds like he's pretty good. I'll have to use that.

Now time for last week's Idol Recap. The fans can't wait to read, while the people who bash it still read as well. We have a good mix. We're in the Dirty Dirty, the ATL for the first night. Josh the glassmaker is the first person to go. His eyes freak them out and they have him sing with their back to them. Simon is frightened, but the others vote him on. JP was 2 seats away from Carrie Underwood in Season 4. He claims to be a music major and he's awful. Asia'h, her dad died 2 days ago and she comes in to do it. Asia'h huh? Weird. Anyways, she's hot and gets through since the judges like her singing and her story. Paula has to walk away from bawling. Miss South Florida is a dumb blonde, but makes it. A good singer. "Possibly the most annoying person I have ever seen in my life."- Simon. Eva busts herself while singing and Simon says she's putting on an act. He tells her to come to him and say she's serious. She says she still loves Simon though. Alex, a 16-year old chick comes in with a posse and 93-year old grandma. She's in for sure and granny is pumped. Nathan says he's 16 and a 9th grade repeat student. Simon says it's a bedroom audition. Him and Simon go at it, he cracked me up. Seacrest asks what a bedroom audition is. "Maybe it's the fact that I refused to spoon with him that he called it that."- Nathan. Amanda is a biker chick/nurse and Randy gives it a trillion percent yes. Paula says she's the real deal and the female Daughtry. She's hardcore and impressive. Josiah dropped out of school and has slept in his car for the last 10 months. He loves living in his car and goes around playing shows. His family has no clue he's living in his car and breaks down crying. He's American, but sings with a British accent. He's my favorite of ATL just because he's interesting, but has talent too.

Second night. Amy Davis, busting out. Plus, she can sing. That's not a bad combo if you ask me. Tiffany, the gospel singing chick just starts breaking the sound barrier. Crazy loud, not good, and her voice wasn't from god like she mentioned. We get twin brothers who had the same girlfriend. Yep, it's as weird as it sounds. She was with one bro before and now has been with the other for the past year. They do this rap duo and were laughed at. The girlfriend comes in next and she's way hot. She brings in a dog for brownie points. We get another dumb blonde and she is bad. "Can I be honest with you? It was excruciating!"- Simon. The twins say behind her back that they told her she was great, but they go back on that word. Cardin is up next. Cardin? Where are these names coming from this year? As Answer told me the other day, these prelim shows go on a few weeks too long. The bums are fun to watch for a bit and then it's more of the same. Joanne is next and she sang the anthem at MSG for the college hoops tourneys. Randy says she must be big time, they send her on. Alesha comes out and sounds like a little kid. Simon says it's dreadful. Randy says she sounds like Dolly Parton and he tells her to come back and sing a Dolly song. She came back and did much better, but Simon still hates it. They send her to Hollywood. Then Simon admits that Paula was right. "Jay Smoove" is a mix of a Kanye/Lupe Fiasco guy. He throws around glitter and rose petals for the ladies. Simon says it was over the top corny. Chikezie Eze from Inglewood, always up to no good. I honestly can't make up these names. He hits up some soul music and jams. I'm a fan. Danny Noriega comes up next with a gangsta name, but is far from it, I think he likes dudes, bad times. Anyways, he has a big voice for a dork. Randy approves of his singing.



Rob & Big you wonder? Last week, the theme is each of them want to get into the Guinness Book of World Records. Rob is after skateboarding and Big with food. Big breaks the peeling 2 bananas in a minute and eating all the way, he had 3 easily. Rob sets 19 world records. This goes to show you how many records are easy to break in the book, so you might as well get your certificate and name in the book, why not? Next week we Rob in a fat suit and he gets to feel what it's like to be Big.

Time for an update on drinks. Since I'm not an alcohol guy at all, let me add my expertise on Gatorade. Anyone tried the new Gatorade G2? This is a low calorie version. I figured I'd get it one day after work just to check it out and see what the hype was about. A big thumbs down from me. On first impression, it's too watered down for my standards since I'm used to regular style Gatorade. Some may like it, but I can't see myself getting this anytime soon. It's drinkable, barely I guess, but I'd steer you away from it, even if my boy Jeter advertises it.



Since I've had my new laptop, I've had issues with the built-in webcam it has. For some reason, it wouldn't recognize it at times and I'd have fits with it. When it worked, it did fine, but I had to switch over to the regular style of cams. The latest addition is a Logitech QuickCam Communicate STX Plus. This thing seems pretty smooth so far and it's real easy to setup. See, we're not just about watching TV and sports in here, we cover all bases of interest. Now you wanna go out there and buy this webcam. Kick over the Gatorade G2 when you see it on the shelves and save your money for this bad boy.

You know one thing I don't get? I've probably spouted off on this before, but hopefully not. It's when people read off of notes. I'm basically talking about speeches. Why can't some people just get up there and wing it? Make it natural instead of something so cut and dry that it serves no purpose. I realize at times it's necessary, but not too often. You see this at graduations, churches, and on TV. I want someone at a graduation to step up one day and say this line: "Everyone else before me did ok, I respect that. However, I'm just going to tell things how it is and not read off some stupid card. This is going to come from my actual opinions and not what someone else may have written up. Then maybe you people may actually pay attention."



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: We're going with another fan suggestion. This week's edition comes to us from The_Freak. http://www.myspace.com/ooosexxxestooo

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: I'm not sure why this is funny to me, but it just is. http://youtube.com/watch?v=pOuumGX-6uc



3 Quick Thangs:

1. It's birthdays you want, it's birthdays you shall get. Let's go with Wednesday, February 13th. That also happens to be my parents' 37th anniversary, dang. Jerry Springer starts us off, he's now 64. Coach K of Duke, 61. I wouldn't have guessed quite that old, but he's doing it and should be the winningest coach in history before all is said and done. Rocker Peter Gabriel, I guess he was relevant in one time, he's doing it for his 58th. Henry Rollins who just screams and is a roid freak, 47. Randy Moss, straight out of West Virginia, 31. No locals to mention today or internet legends, but I'll give out an early shoutout to Bono of #basketball fame, Happy Birthday on the 17th!

2. American Gangster comes out on DVD next Tuesday, February 19th. You better load up, whether you've seen it or not. One of the best movies from 2007, the best I've seen for sure.

3. In the "I learn something everyday" genre, Jas gives us this one. Maybe I'm the only one that isn't up on this, but it's something to think of. Apparently, when you put a crab into a bucket, it will climb out of there. No biggie, right? Then, supposedly when you put 2 in the same bucket, they'll be stuck in there forever as they bring each other down. Hey, I didn't test it out, but I'll take Jas' word for it since she's all smart and stuff, hah. Until next time...