Harold & Kumar Go To Cleveland

Time for a weekly post. Sometimes they come quicker, other times, not. That's how we roll around here. In this post, we'll talk about a number of things, but only one thing went down that was relevant to my week. As usual though, I'll still come through with a post for you to read through and hopefully it turns out with good reviews.



I'm not the type that posts a lot of jokes and stuff because people get sick of that junk in their emails. Speaking of, what's up with people forwarding stupid emails that you're never going to read anyways? I never did get that. Oh well, they must get a kick out of it. I was bored one day and clicked on someone's MySpace bulletin and actually read the thing for once. So I'll waste your time and post this joke that I thought was kind of clever. I'm not a guy that normally posts jokes because most people skip over them, but this one was new to me, so here you go:

I was at the mall the other day eating at the food court. I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. The old man kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find the old man staring every time. When the teenager had
enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?" The old man responded, "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I
was just wondering if you were my son."

Yesterday was a trip to Cleveland with my boy Spank. I've been looking forward to this one for a while. No, it wasn't an Indians game as you might have guessed. This one was for Ring of Honor Wrestling and it was unbelievable. I'll talk about the wrestling part in a bit, but I'll start things off with the actual road trip. You can't ever have enough road trips is my theory.

I did the driving for the festivities. We rolled out of E-Town around noon or so. We hit up some Wendy's action in Bridgeport. We didn't think anyone would be at that one as we thought it was an old dirty dump that was about to be finished. It was packed, a madhouse. After that, we get on Route 50 and go about our business. A road trip with a guy that is a huge rap fan? That makes things better. Those don't happen much. I couldn't take all of my CDs in the car because that'd be a bunch, so I grabbed the case labeled "#-D", meaning all of my CDs that are alphabetically from a rapper starting with a number and going through the Ds. Almost 90 degrees and he's drinking coffee on the way up and I'm chugging some hot chocolate. We're weird cats.



We get into Cleveland which I love the city. Very easy to get to and you can't get lost. I'm a guy that sucks at driving and even I can handle Cleveland with no problems. On the way up for CDs, we listened to DMX, 6 Shot (nobody has heard of him reading this, but he's very good), Benzino, Biggie, and you can't roll into Cleveland without going with some Bone Thugs. As they famously say, "Cleveland is the city where we come from, so run."

So we get into town around 5:00 or a bit earlier and start checking out the area. We park for $10, which wasn't bad and it was close to where we needed to be. The Indians played at 7:05, a few blocks from where we needed to be, so town was hopping. We ate at this Tally place called Alesci's I believe it was. You can eat outside there, so that's what we did. I got a few strombolis (a fancy name for a pepperoni roll is what I always said) and it was good stuff. Also, while there, we saw this hot Tally chick outside working and doing the sales for the drinkers. Beautiful and had it all going on for her or so we thought. Everything was going great while checking that out until she busted out the cigarette. Doh! As me and my cousin Ozzie say, that's when she gets X'ed off our list, no questions about it, it's over for the girl then.

Then it was time to go to the Cleveland Grays Armory. They told us we could get tickets at 6:00, so we were one of the first in line that didn't get their tickets online. An hour later, and we're still in line. I'm talking about dripping buckets out there. Interesting crew we hung with while in line though to say the least. People from all over came to this show, you'd be surprised. Anyways, we get 4th row seats and have a great view. About 500 people were in the crowd. For anyone who is even somewhat of a wrestling fan, do me a favor and check out Ring of Honor, I can't say it enough. It's nothing like what you see on TV that is watered down. You get one of the most respectful crowds I've seen, great chants if they have to cuss people, and the in-ring action is bar none the best there is. My second favorite wrestling show in person ever, hailing only closely behind the CyberSlam 1999 ECW show at the best wrestling arena ever, the ECW Arena.



I won't bore anyone with too much of the actual wrestling part. I know most reading don't want to hear that. I will say though that the claim of Bryan Danielson being the best wrestler in the world is no joke. If he's not #1, he's definitely very high on the list. Just amazing stuff and in person it's even better. At the end of the night, the fans were chanting, "Best in the world!.." over and over. I also got to see a great Christopher Daniels against Christian match in which Christian lost. Generation Next's last night together with that name got beat by newcomers Davey Richards, Jerrelle Clark, and Irish Airborne in an insane 8-Man Dragon Gate Rules Tag Match. Yeah, I realize I'm typing this last paragraph to myself, but I won't go into anymore how awesome ROH was. They return to Cleveland on October 6th and I hope to be there again.

Time to wrap this road trip up. On the way home, we were starving. Spank was craving Pizza Hut, but it was closed, so I saw White Castle and knew that was our answer. I've never been, but I'm a huge Harold & Kumar fan, so that sold me. We ended up ordering 10 cheeseburgers, onion rings, clams, a cinnamon bun, sausage biscuit, and 2 drinks. The burgers are tiny though, but pretty good. I could probably eat 12 of them or so if I had to with no problem and I'm not a big eater. Spank figured he'd sleep the whole trip back, which I wasn't tired, so that didn't bother me. Back to the CDs. I listened to more Bone on the way out of Cleveland just out of tradition. Radio on this trip sucked. I couldn't even pick up a rap station in the area and there were no sports radio stations that would come in good, ugh. Radio, at least I gave you a chance. Back to rap the rest of the way home. I popped in some Clipse (best rap performance I've seen in person) and The Dayton Family for the rest of the trip. Got home around 4:30 and woke up around 2:30. Good times.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/ebonyjnyc

3 Quick Thangs:

1. CM Punk with his in-ring TV debut for ECW on Tuesday night, sweet.

2. Gum fans, does it get much better than Big League Chew?

3. Let's go with some birthday for Monday, July 31st. Wesley Snipes turns 44. Kevin Greene of the Steelers days is also 44. Superman Dean Cain goes for 40. Former Heisman Trophy winner Andre Ware hits 38. Another QB, Gus Frerotte, best known to me for headbutting the wall and hurting himself, Happy 35th. There ya go.

Redneck Fatties

Sometimes I make you guys wait a few days for a post, other times I make you wait almost a week. It keeps everyone on their toes. Besides, if I had a definite deadline, I'd feel like a bum if I didn't get a post in exactly when I said. I'm weird like that. Well, the week is up and it's time to open up shop and see what kind of stories (all true) I have for ya this time.



First things first. Movie fans, let's give a few quick reviews. Go see Clerks II as soon as possible. Please take my word on that. Me and Cork hit that up on Thursday at midnight in the mean streets of Fairmont. I was surprised of the crowd first of all. Second, at the end of the movie, the theater erupted in claps. No joke people, it was that good. I didn't expect it to be decent as it had high expectations from the original, but it's awesome. And for those who haven't seen the first, get out there and rent it or something. A possible Top-10 movie of all time for me is Clerks II, maybe I'm judging too soon. You get Jay, Silent Bob, the regular cast of characters, and also the beautiful Rosario Dawson. Guys, you need to see her dance scene on the roof, crazy good stuff. The second theater movie I've seen this week was Little Man. I'm a huge Wayans Brothers fan and stupid dumb comedies are my favorites. This one I was bored and just watched online (the joy of the internet) and it cracked me up good. If you like funny stories that you don't have to think about much while watching, here ya go, I recommend it.

Wednesday night I hit up Denny's with Cork. Don't you just love how I can just jump from day to day in here? I gotta keep your attention somehow. The theme of the night was goofy rednecks. This table of fatties thought they were the funniest thing ever. One kept calling the pay phone and it rang off the hook. Then their humor other than that was their big trucks. They'd drive around the lot as the others watched and laughed, then would come back and park their trucks sideways. Then they'd all get pumped that they were rebel enough to park their trucks sideways. I'm all for being goofy and laughing at middle school humor (hey, I just got done watching Clerks II and Little Man), but I'm not much for the whole redneck crowd. Just not for me.



Here's a shaving story for all to laugh at. I've talked in here before and most of my crew knows that I like being all smooth and stuff as far as shaving goes. I can't stand too much hair on me. Anyways, while shaving my chest the other day (not that much is there, but then again, I like the smoothness factor), I was going too fast and nicked up one of my nipples. It happens. Burns like crazy though. Come to find out, another one of my buddies has done that before, so I'm not the only one. Hey, at least I'm not a redneck who parks their truck sideways to fit in. Something different I like to add for anyone bored enough to read this space for each post I make, which I appreciate it.

Anyone internet radio fans out there? I've been trying Winamp Shoutcast Radio as of late. Cork got me hooked on this. I didn't even know about it to be honest. But any kind of music you want and there's tons of stations just for that genre. The rap stuff is where I hang of course and it's impressive. The names of the stations are funny too once you get inside. There's also a good comedy section of stations in there that are worth checking out. If you have Winamp and have never tried this, just click View, then Media Library. After that, go into Online Services and then Shoutcast Radio. Then you're in business to jam.



On the video game front, for now, I'm holding off on getting NCAA '07. I thought long and hard on this one. I'm fired up that they didn't make a GameCube version first of all. I have a PS2 and that was an option, but the PS2 makes me mad in that it takes forever (or as Squints says in The Sandlot, "Forevahhh! Forrreeevahhh!") to load. I'll probably wait till August 22nd when Madden '07 comes out. Yesterday I finally got Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow for Nintendo DS. Some reviews have rated it as the best DS game ever. That's high praise. It's very good though from what I've played in the past day and worth the purchase.

Yep, we're due to add some more CDs to the collection. Most skip through this section, but that's fine. Like I always say, there's a little something in my posts for everyone. My cousin Kari joked the other day that when she sees pics of the rappers, she just moves right along, hah. Fair enough.



Afroman: Drunk 'N' High. The title of the CD has nothing to do with what I'm into, but Afroman is one funny dude, so I might as well get this since I have his other albums. I'm always up for some comedy in my day.

Bone Crusher: Release The Beast. I wasn't big on Bone Crusher's first CD, but I'll give this one a chance. I like that he comes with some mean raps, so that's a plus. Will he just be a one-hit wonder from the Never Scared single of 2003? That one still holds up strong.

Boot Camp Clik: The Last Stand. This one is supposedly a release just for England, but it's coming to West Virginia anyways. These guys started out on the underground scene and seem to keep that tradition. They're big into lyricism and have a real good DJ in Hi-Tek. True hip hop, check it out.

Choppa: Coming Back Home. Da Real Choppa as he claims, as there's also Choppa from Puff's Da Band a while back. This one hasn't released anything since 2003, so he's definitely due. His first CD, Choppa Style was pretty good stuff I thought. "Chop-chop-choppa style". We all remember that chorus.

Pimp C: Pimpalation. This is a 2-disc set, but the 2nd was chopped and screwed which is garbage. Some big time characters on this CD such as Scarface, Lil Flip, Trae, Bun-B of course, Jazze Pha, Mike Jones, Slim Thug, 8Ball, MJG, Webbie, Lil Boosie, Mannie Fresh, Big Mike, Chamillionaire, Jagged Edge, Big Gipp, Z-Ro.. That's a bunch. He's ready to show his stuff after getting out of jail not too long ago.

State Property: The Gang Is All Here. This is what I'm talking about, quality stuff here. Freeway opens it off right from the get-go and straight brings it. That's worth it alone. The whole Roc La Familia is on this one and if there's Freeway tracks, I'm always interested. I'm also a big Young Gunz fan too.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: MySpace is mangled right now, so we'll go another option. It's Buffie the Body time. I've shown her pics on here before, and you've seen her in rap videos, but some legit ghetto booty here: http://www.buffiethebody.com/main.htm.

3 Quick Thangs:

1. Big list here. Let's go with some birthdays for Sunday, July 23rd: Baseballer Don Drysdale (maybe dead?) is 70. Woody Harrelson goes for 45. The Original NBA Big Dog, Antoine Carr, hits 45 as well. Slash from GNR fame is 41, but should've been dead about 5 times already. NBA Champion Gary Payton turns 38. Marlon Wayans is 34, funny how I talked about one of his movies above too. Good ol' Monica Lewinsky is 33. Runner Maurice Greene is 32. And last but not least, #basketball member Kris3, is 27.

2. Can you get a stiff neck and from doing too many crunches? Well, that's what I did. Doh.

3. I'm hooked on Crystal Light Peach Tea. No sugar, but it tastes like it does. Plus, it's easy to make.

Olive Garden, Sex Toys, & Insanity

We're back for another episode of what goes down in Shinnston. I hope to have a little bit in here for everyone as I always try to do. The things we'll tangle this time around deal with an Olive Garden trip with my crew, me being bored and shopping for stupid things, baseball cards, sex toys (more on that later and I know you're interested), fantasy football approaching, and the other unusual happenings.. Let's go..



I'll start with some recent things. Saturday night some of us planned to go to a Pirates game. With the day approaching, there was a 60% chance of rain and I was getting too many maybe commitments rather than a solid yes or no. That's when Ozzie asked if I wanted to hit up Olive Garden with the crew instead. Sure, why not. It got me out of the house for one and I was intrigued. We get to the new one in Morgantown around 6:20 or so. The place is an absolute madhouse, but I guess that's somewhat expected for what time we got there. Anyways, we find out that we have to wait 85 minutes just to be seated. What?? I'm not the most patient guy in the world, but I was also on a schedule that I didn't have anything else to do, so I might as well tough it out with the crowd that was already outside waiting like two stray dogs fighting over a piece of meat.

We get in and sit down and I'm liking the atmosphere. I've been to Olive Garden a few times before, but this was most of our first times hitting up the Morgantown action that had been opened for about a month. The owner? His name is Dom Guillermo. That sounds like a Mafia movie name, that can't be real can it? Anyways, I like it. Who was in attendance? 8 of us: Fortney, Abbey, Ozzie, Matt Mills, Kari and her man Matt (who fits in good with the family now that I find out he's a big rap fan, plus he drove us to Morgantown, props to him), Darren, and myself. We had 2 waiters/waitresses for our table. It was busy and it wasn't their fault, but they need to step it up just a bit. We had Eugene the gay dude on one end and some chick that acted way too happy to be there on the other end. Still, that made for entertainment and things for me to write about in here. The bread is an issue though. We joked that Ozzie, Kari, and myself will say what's on our mind and you don't have to wonder what we're thinking. Not in a mean way, but I just like being honest about stuff and that's what you get. Anyways, they bring out a basket of bread with 4 sticks in them for each side. That one per person. What's up with that? They're gone in like 2.4 seconds and we have to find Big Eugene and tell him to bring more back which took forever. Why not just bring like 20 out at a time? It's not like they'd go to waste. I'm talking too much on this, but it was a real good time just to tell some stories at the table and I ordered my favorite in manicotti and it was quality. Still not as good as Mom's manicotti, but this is a trip I'd do again. The prices surprised us all as it wasn't as rich boy as I expected. My bill was in the $11 range, sweet. That's like almost free.



After that, we got home around 9:30 or so. That's when the crew rolls to Fortney's place. First, I love the setup of their house, it's pimped out pretty good and all organized. Some of the guys played cards, while others were just bums and laughed at what was going on. The locals are bored reading, so I'll give the run down of who was in attendance: You get the same 8 who just got in from Olive Garden, plus AJ and Josie, Sweet Pea, Jimmy Mills, and Mudcat of the 200 nuggets fame. I don't know the exact story, so if someone there wants to make a comment and explain, have at it: But Fortney runs upstairs and gets a Gigi. Hopefully I spelled that right, but if not, it's a porn toy for a dude that basically looks like a rubber slinky with a hole in the top and yeah, you do that to it. Don't say I didn't warn ya. For as much as I've seen porn stuff like everyone and their brother out there, I've never seen one of these in person or at least held one anyways until last night. :) Fortney says it's never been used, so I'll have to take his word on that, hah. Hey, I'm all about busting out interesting stuff for the crowd. You never know what might go down. And now I might have just sparked the sales for some porn toys, I can see you all running out tonight and loading up on stuff.

Friday night I was totally bored, so what better way to cure boredom? That's right, go out and shop and spend money on things you don't really need, but you end up getting anyways. One of the first stops was Gabes and for those who haven't seen me write on that before or don't have one in your area, that's a bargain store. Bargains seem to strike me up good. If it's on sale, there's a good chance I'm going to be hooked to it and buy more clothes and shoes that I don't need. And that's what happened, but I liked my choices this time. After that, I roll to Wal-Mart, the excitement at night for people in West Virginia. I didn't even need anything, but by the time the stay was over, I needed a buggy to get out of there. Yeah, it's addicting. While in there, I bought a box of baseball cards and had a blast opening those up when I got home, even if they're worth jack squat. Fortney was also in attendance as I saw him out of nowhere and we chatted it up for a good while. I even convinced him to get some football cards. Yep, we have too much time on our hands.



I'm writing a bunch today, so I better get ready to slow my roll and start wrapping up. No, not wrapping up like the condom commercials, but putting this bad boy to a conclusion soon. Fantasy football is getting close and I'm getting excited. It's not fantasy basketball or baseball, but it works to fix the need. Next month, I could possibly have 3 different drafts. One is A#FL and that's the keeper league we have for the #basketball crew. We get to keep 3 players and mine more than likely will be Marc Bulger, Julius Jones of Notre Dame fame, and his brother Thomas Jones. Speaking of Thomas, what's up with Tom Dogg in Shinnston? Crazy things go down, it's getting gangsta in town. After that league, I'm in a college fantasy league that is also a keeper league. This one is ran by ManDingo and I like this one a lot. You can drop anyone you want at season's end if you have transactions to fill them with and obviously seniors are gone too for the following season. It's detailed and well put together. Third, I might take a spot for Fortney's money league that features 10 of the local crew. Could be some fun times, but I'll talk more on these leagues as the time comes.

As I'm typing this up, this will prove how much bum time goes down in Shinnston. Of course I don't mind being a bum, but I make it sound like I actually do something noteworthy each day. The power of words. Anyways, this wasp is flying around my room and he's up to no good. Instead of him getting the first hit of the battle, it's my time to step up and face this creature. I grab a shirt nearby and wrap it up like a baseball bat. Then he comes flying through and I try to just mangle him into pieces. After picking the right spot, he drops to my bed after a swift swing. Then with a whack, he's flopping around like he didn't know what hit him. Fun stuff. I'm mean like that. Wasp: 0, Me: 1. A winner is you!



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/hotpinkpo (I've been hitting up the variety of chicks as I can't single out any certain group. This time I go with one that I have a connection to. No, I don't know this chick, but she's Italian and looks good, so there's my reasonm, deal with it.)

3 Quick Thangs:

1. I know I'm not in the Dirty South, but it's going to feel like it this week. 92 today, 95 tomorrow, 92 on Tuesday, and 88 on Wednesday. Ugh, forget that mess. Give me my snow back.

2. We're due for birthdays. Let's go with Monday, July 17th: Connie "The Hawk" Hawkins, one of the pioneers of dunking and great basketball players of old, turns 64. The Hoff, David Hasselhoff goes for 54. Belinda Carlisle of the Go-Go's turns 48. Scott Norwood, the goat of Super Bowl XXV is 46.

3. Congratulations time. This one goes out to my boy Spank. Yesterday, he was the winner of a local NCAA Football 2006 tournament on PlayStation 2 at GameStop. Easy win for him as I don't think anyone in the area wants a piece of him in this game, seriously. During the final game, he was up 56-0 and the guy he played tapped out like a little girl and quit. I love it. Tuesday, NCAA 2007 comes out, pimp.

200 Nuggets in 4 Hours??

I got some stories to tell in this one. I shouldn't have any worries filling space this week, so we'll see what I can come up with for everyone's reading pleasure. Some of the topics we'll discuss include Mudcat's attempt to eat as many chicken nuggets as he could, a family cookout on Saturday, moving Cork to Morgantown on Sunday and near wrecks on the interstate, fantasy NBA talk, and whatever else goes down. Strap on the saddle and get ready for the ride..



Thursday night was some fun times. Ozzie had a bet with Mudcat of eating chicken nuggets. The bet was that Mudcat said he could eat 200 Chik-Fil-A nuggets in a span of 4 hours. To me, that sounded almost impossible, but many of the guys thought Mud would be able to handle that. We go to Mikey Darway's for the festivities and throughtout the night, there was probably upwards of 25 people there and just as many phone calls wanting updates as the progress went. The first 20 minutes, Mud was dominating. He didn't go in with a great strategy with this approach. In 20 minutes, he ate a whopping 50 nuggets. That's crazy. He started at 6:00 and by 7:45, he was close to tapping out. At 7:45 or so, he had 78 in him and people were disappointed. People started leaving a bit, but it was fun just to hang out with the crew, play Stump the Schwab on TV with the best sports trivia crew in the area hands down (take that to the bank), and just get out of the house. I leave around 8:30. Later, I hear that Clay Riley stopped over and convinced Mud to eat 12 more to get to 90. That shows what excitement we have in Shinnston that we resort to that kind of fun. But admit it, you would've wanted to watch that too. Good times. Mudcat also says he can eat 50 PB&J sandwiches too, yeah right. It makes for a nice story though. A nice try Mud, I had fun.

Pick me for the Good Samaritan Award. I hung out with Ashley on Friday and she leaves around 4:00 or so. We hit up some shopping and then El Rincon. You can't go wrong with some good Mexican. About 5:30, I get a call saying her car is smoking and overheating and she needs help. Of course, I have no clue about cars, but I'll go pick her up to see what I can do. I meet her in Fairmont and have her follow me home. Still, the car is overheating a lot and we decide to rest it. It probably wasn't safe to have her drive it that night, so we went to Fairmont the next morning around 7:45 (me waking up at 7:00 AM on a Saturday, yep, I went all out) and we went to find some mechanics at the Pontiac garage to fix it. They weren't open on Saturday, so we roll to a place nearby. They said it wasn't hot enough to charge us to fix it, but they just told her to be careful. I was nice enough to follow her to New Martinsville an hour away or a bit more, eat Chinese there, and drive back. You talk about being in a coma when I got home, but it's fine. At the Chinese restaurant, I joked that for as many CDs as I make, I need to come up with a Chinese restaurant mix. I go up to pay the Chinese chick and bobbing my head like an idiot to the music as if it's some rap song. Hey, I don't care that I make a fool out of myself, it's fun.



That night, it was family cookout on the Italian side of the family. Cunningham Run for the locals familiar with the mean streets out there. We don't get to do that often, but it's always a good time with stories and things of the like. The cooking was great. I loaded up on some Nathan's hot dogs (the kind Kobayashi eats), some corn on the cob that was great, a ton of chicken wings, and finished it off with cake that was off the charts. I was in charge of the tea that night (not like it's hard to make) and me and Ozzie tore up some peach tea. We drank like 3 little pitchers. This brings us to a funny thing with Cork and Walz. They want to have a sweet tea drinking contest. Yep, me and my buddies have nothing else to do. I should have some pictures coming soon of that action of the cookout, courtesy of my cousin Jill and her husband Gayle, who manned the grill for the night and did an awesome job.

Sunday was moving day. Big Cork rolls out of the West Side of Shinnston and goes to Morgantown. We had a lot of help as it was me, Posey, Mule, Cork, Cork's Mom, Cork's brother-in-law Dale who is a real good dude, Cork's sister, and Ashley Southern. I used Dad's truck and had to put gas in it before I left. After filling it up at Go-Mart, the truck wouldn't start. Posey had to come jump the truck and that wasn't a good start to the trip. The truck worked fine other than that, but we have an awesome story to tell. Cork was in front with his car loaded up, I was behind him, Mule 3rd in line on the road, and Posey bringing up the rear. We had things secured great in the vehicles we thought. Well, near Cork's exit, I had this wooden nightstand in the back of the truck. Going about 75 or so, the thing flies out on the interstate, right in front of Mule and his big truck. He couldn't get out of the way, so he had to literally bowl right through it. I saw out of the rearview that it was just obliterated and pieces were going everywhere on the interstate, boucning off the bridge and stuff. A total mess. We thought Mule's truck would be mangled, but luckily it wasn't. Posey said he looked up and a leg was flying with a huge nail sticking up and he barely missed it. So there ya go. One interesting weekend for me, but it rocked.



Early July means one big thing for my crew. Yep, it's the first time I send out emails for fantasy basketball. We don't have our draft until late October, but this is what I live for. We plan it out in detail to make sure we're ready to go. Who all is in the league this year? 12 of us: Me, Cork, Spank, Mudcat, Fortdog, Riley, Fleece, ManDingo, TJ, Sidell, Posey, and Ozzie (the rookie this year). I send out some feeler (no homo) emails to get the crew started and we talk about what needs changed for the upcoming season. I'll bore you all with enough EDDFL (E-Town Diaper Dandies Fantasy League) too much this year anyways, so that's a starter.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/michelleloveli

3 Quick Thangs:



1. How about some birthdays for Tuesday, July 11th? Boxer Leon Spinks who fought local Tommy Thomas is 53. Actress Sela Ward is 50 and still looks good. Bon Jovi rocker Richie Sambora goes for 47. Debbe Dunning, the Tool Time Girl from the Home Improvement days is 40.

2. A new book for the collection. I went with Tangled Ropes by Superstar Billy Graham (the wrestler) and Keith Elliot Greenberg. I had a 20% off coupon to use at Borders before last Sunday. You know me, I can't pass up bargains. I'm about 65 pages in and I'm hooked. Wrestling is enough to get me there, but you also get the steroid and drug stories, his bodybuilding days, etc. A true legend.

3. The new Chappelle Show season started last night. If you haven't seen it, you need to watch the skit on 2Pac. Maybe you won't find it funny, but me and my buddies thought it was genius. Just listen to the words: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XLOvETgVMc

Red Hot Dollars

Too many things to put into this space, so I better just get straight to business. It's been about a week since our last post and I think I'll be able to chat it up about all kinds of different topics. There should be something for everyone to enjoy in this one, if I do it right. Be ready for a huge post. Anyways, it's time for me to ramble as I do best..



Where do I even begin? Lots of options to go with here, but I'll start out with one that people are wondering about all week. I'm back in the single life (yeah, that fast, I know what you're thinking), but hear me out. I jumped into things too fast with Ashley, so now we're just doing our own thing and stopping the relationship. I won't bore everyone with that, but we're still cool with each other and will hang out. Got any questions, just ask. A very sweet girl though that I click with on so many things and it's just way more relaxed now not trying the whole "relationship" if you will. It's funny how many people wrote me that were surprised that I actually have a girl to go out with after dating very very rarely. Hey, even I get out of the house every now and then.

I was all over the place this past weekend. I went to the Cabela's in Wheeling and that's one huge store. My favorite things about the whole building was the fish tanks with just about any fish you can think of and also the animal displays. While there, there was a ton of Amish people in there, so that was interesting since you don't see that in my area. You can spend a lot of time in there and not get bored. Even if you don't hunt or fish. In that same day, we rolled to St. Clairsville, Ohio. We hit up the mall there and then wanted to get some big eating in. It was Red Lobster time there and you can't ever go wrong with that deal. So in a span of a few hours, I was in almost 3 states (a few minutes away from PA that day).



What's new in the world of movies? After seeing The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift on Wednesday, it was time for another on Sunday. I rolled to the new Meadowbrook Mall cinemas. Not brand new as they're probably been there for 6 months probably, but it was my first appearance. Yeah, I'm a slacker. There for a while, I was rocking it out on the theater movies. I need to get back in that groove. Sunday I watched Click and thought it was very good. For those wondering, you get quite a bit of the old school Sandler that we all know and love. That's ten times better than serious Sandler, at least to me. This movie will bring tears to your eyes though. Or maybe it's just that I'm a wuss with those type of scenes in movies, hah. Hey, I admit it. Even people in the mean streets of East Shinnston can shed some tears every now and then.

Nothing out of the ordinary went down for the July 4th extravaganza. Saturday night we had the fireworks in E-Town. My area gets packed in like sardines for that, I guess that's all my town has going for it. Anyways, each time I watch fireworks, I can't help but think of my favorite movie of all time, The Sandlot. Gotta love when they play ball under the fireworks. As I would say, that's quality stuff.



Ok, I got carried away with the new CDs. You all know how I am with that. I'll get a few one week and then out of nowhere I'll just get this wild hair up me and won't be able to stop. Yeah, I'm a mess when it comes to downloading albums, deal with it. I got a ton to write on CDs, so I'll spare everyone with a lot of wrestling talk this week. What'd I get? Of course, it's all rap, but I'll weigh in:

Ray Cash: Cash on Delivery. A new cat from Cleveland and this CD is very solid. You get some decent names on this album such as Scarface, Bun-B (who is on everyone's CD), Beanie Sigel, and Pastor Troy. Bumpin' My Music featuring Scarface rocks it out.



Tha Dogg Pound: Cali Iz Active. Yep, that DPG you're thinking of. Big Snoop Dogg together with Daz and Kurupt. You also have Nate Dogg on this CD, so you know it has to be good. As said many times on CD reviews in this very space, it ain't a hit until Nate Dogg spit.

Fiend: The Addiction - Hope Is Near. The same Fiend from the No Limit days. Now he's on his own, but he still has the same mean fire he's always had. If you want some good mean rap, load up on this stuff. This will have you wanting to bust someone's head up. :)

Kool Keith: The Return of Dr. Octagon. We go way back here for some true hip hop action. Most people sleep on this guy, but he's a major player in the New York rap scene. He started out with the Ultramagnetic MCs in the 80s (another member of this group was Tim Dog who Snoop and Dre used to rip back in the day). He's brash and always tries to find a way to get some porn references in his rhymes, but he's also known for bashing commercial/mainstream rap with impressive lyrics.

Money Gang: Chain Gang Mixtape - Volume 1. Some Bay Area rap here that I haven't heard before. But as usual, I'm interested in any Bay stuff as it's my favorite. I'll give it a try, but haven't listened yet. I'll write more once I hear some of these CDs.

Roscoe: I Luv Cali. More California rap here. This is the same dude known as Young Roscoe. But I guess he's not "young" anymore? For those who don't know him, this is the little bro of Kurupt mentioned above, so he has the rap game in his genes.



Waist Deep Soundtrack. An awesome soundtrack here. This is the movie with The Game in it. Also, another CD that features Nate Dogg, so that's worth it alone. Too many people to name on this CD, but it has some major talent. I hope to get to see this movie because you can't go wrong with rap movies.

Wax Murdaraz: City Ta City Killin' Spree. I downloaded this one just based on the name alone. How can you go wrong with a group called Wax Murdaraz? I also like my chances that I'm the only one in my entire area with this CD.

Young Hootie: Young Compton Mixtape. Yeah, I spent way too much time in a West Coast rap chatroom finding these CDs. But I saw the name, saw that Compton was involved, so it's worth a listen. What do I have to lose?

Yung Joc: New Joc City. We're going mainstream here. This is Puff's latest creation on his Bad Boy South label. Everyone has probably heard It's Goin' Down by now. Also, Puff and Joc performed together at last week's BET Awards and it was pretty good stuff. Joc is one tiny guy though. But then again, most rappers are midgets.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/sandrapena949



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Since I posted this one on Wednesday, let's go with the birthdays of Thursday, July 6th: Burt Ward of Robin & Batman fame is 61 if he's still alive. The man, Rocky (Sylvester Stallone) goes for 60, geez. A guy 60 shouldn't look like that and be all roided out like a statue. Fred Dryer of old school NFL fame and the show Hunter is also 60. Underrated NFL receiver in his day, Alvin Harper, wish him a Happy 38th. Seems older than that. Tia and Tamera Mowry from Sister, Sister are 28, some hot twins there.

2. I'm hooked on the Red Hot Dollars candy.

3. CM Punk debuted on ECW this week. Words can't even describe how excited I am about that.