Thursday, December 13, 2007

"Pelvis Has Left The Building, Baby!"

Another week is in the books and we can smell the Christmas trees in the air. Mine has been up for a few days. Of course, the first ornament that went up was the Larry Bird figurine. That's been a tradition at our house for a good while. He is the Basketball Jesus after all, what other ornament is going to go first? The man did turn 51 on December 7th, so that's worth celebrating for. What do we have on tap for this issue? We're pulling from deep and mixing it up with the usual suspects.



You know what's weird to me? That is the weather in my area. Last week, my town had 8 inches of snow. Nothing out of the ordinary for West Virginia. Then, just on Tuesday, it sprung up to 68 degrees. This isn't September. This is mid-December, the wacky times have begun. Today? Floods all over the place. Now for the upcoming weekend? We have more snow that is supposed to pile up. I can't keep up with things. No wonder I'm getting the sore throat and killer sinus headaches. Half of that is more than likely from no sleep. I think in the past week alone, I've slept over 5½ hours a night only once. Most of those nights were nearing 4, but I never learn.

Kid Nation and we have two weeks to mention. The first, was from December 5th. On this one, Sophia does a good job being town sheriff and the kiddies like how she ran things. The council goes to search and finds a chief in a teepee that gives them advice, nothing too eventful so far. The groups end up winning the weekly award and Sophia has to pick between a town monument that will be there forever or a hot air balloon ride. She goes with the ride for whatever that's worth. Seinfeld flips out because he gets no respect. He cries like a baby at the voting ceremony and then goes back in demanding respect. First, you lost the respect when you went in bawling your eyes out. Man up kid, get with it. Ironically, the other kids didn't think much of his crying and he went stomping out of the voting house. 9-year old Snaggletooth Alex gets the gold star for this episode. Just because Jared is Jared and he's not quite right, he gets the line of the week. Jared and Snaggletooth are walking around the area and they find some cow bones. They're identifying the bones (I guess geniuses do that for fun?) and Jared takes off up the hill saying, "Pelvis has left the building, baby!" If you don't watch the show, that's probably pointless, but if you know how much of a mess Jared is, you'd crack up.



On the finale, it opens up with scenes from the season. The job board goes up into flames and Mike freaks out. The board burns up and also the host burns the journal telling them the town's directions. No more job classes or money. They start raiding the candy shop and say there are no rules. People are stealing and the town goes mad. After the town is destroyed, they clean it up the next day. The last gold star has to be given away early and on the spot. The council gives it to Seinfeld for being a leader from day one. I guess his crying last week like a girl ended up working for him? Doh. Chicken McFatty Pants gets fired up at the yellow team for them not letting her stay one night in their bunk. She flips out and because they want to spend the night with their original crew. The host busts out three stars worth $50,000 each. The have one last challenge and that is to work together in an hour to prepare for a "bonanza" party. They win the reward and their parents come to hang with them to eat. The first $50,000 star goes to Sophia, second to Morgan, and third to Migle. And that's the end of the season, thumbs up from me. Second season?

Real World chatter. We also have two weeks worth of action here as well. For the first, we having Isaac coming back out of nowhere. Earlier in the season, he flipped out when a black cat crossed his path and then started freaking like he was on acid. I say that because he admits he's an acid head, what a piece of work. He's pumped that Trish is out of the house. Everyone but KellyAnne is saying that people didn't like Trish. Isaac dives naked into the fishtank wearing a snorkel and flippers. Dunbar and Ashli finally end up screwing around, like we couldn't see that coming. I think they pick a lot of people in a relationship (Dunbar) and then just watch them combust and hook up with some random dirty. It happens every season and too much in life if you ask me. I'm no expert on relationships, but we need stats for the percentage of people that have cheated before. I bet it's much higher than you're expecting. Would 50% be a bad estimate? And in the end, after I got on that tangent, KellyAnne and Parisa are being buddies again, weird.



The latest has KellyAnne and Cohutta doing their thing. Cohutta's condom busts and they're paranoid that she's pregnant. Ashli tells her mom about sleeping with Dunbar, that's different. Cohutta's grandpa gives him the advice of "Remember what makes a man. It's not how much liquor he can drink. It's not how much ass he can whip. It's how he handles himself in crisis." It made it better that it was in this big hick accent. KellyAnne finds out she got lucky and isn't pregnant now. Towards the end of the show, Dunbar and Ashli are cussing each other and it's all out drama. As Isaac said earlier in the season, if ya sleep with someone in the house, it's going to end all crazy. Does every single person on this show smoke? Ugh. Next week, more drama with Dunbar and Ashli.

What's new in the world of working out and supplements I'm taking? I get on a kick every now and then load up on something new. The Lobstah guys heard this story a few weeks ago, but time to weigh in on something different. The latest stuff I'm taking is called naNO Vapor from MuscleTech. It's a pre-workout mix that gets you jacked up in layman's sense. It's similar to No-Xplode I was on earlier this year. The warnings on this jug are crazy, but I haven't fell over dead yet. A few funny, or not-so-funny things maybe, is that you can't leave the jug open for over 30 seconds and you can't bump it around or it's some kind of hazard. No joke. Who knows. Anyways, after being on it for a few weeks, it's pretty good. It gives you more of a heat sensation and you get a crazy amount of energy to workout on. I put it a notch below No-Xplode, but it still gets a thumbs up from me. Go out and pick it up.



I'm not much of a jewerly dude, but one thing I never could explain was chick rings. What do I mean? I'm sure most people can, but you could show me a few expensive rings and a few not so expensive and I wouldn't be able to tell a whole lot. And then you get to talking about how many carats a ring has and all of that. What's the diffence in ring that costs $200 compared to one that is $4000? Yeah, $3800, but that's not what I mean. Is there really that much of a quality difference. Chicks, help me out here. Then again, I don't have to waste my money on that type of stuff right now anyways, just something that popped into my head.

It may be time for a new car. I have one payment left on my car and will be finished up on that. Now, do I want to just chill for a few months with no car payment or do I want to jump right into something? I'll have to play that out and see what goes down. I've been an old lady Buick fan since they're smooth riders and I can get them decked out inside. I've only had 2 cars over the years, my first when I was 19, the 1979 Buick Electra. Some called that beast The Pimpmobile. 10 miles per gallon, a backseat as big as some living rooms, and a trunk to fit all kinds of dead bodies if need be. That beast was solid and then I finally drove it until the bottom fell out of it, literally. The car I've had since January 2004 is a 2003 Buick Regal. Nothing elegant, but I dig it and it's 3 times better on gas than my old deal. I'll probably change my mind 20 different times, but right now I'm deciding on an all black Jeep Patriot or a black Buick Lucerne, probably a 2007 model on those as I can't see me getting a brand new one. You drive the brand new one off the lot and $10,000 is taken off the top it seems like for what it's worth, so what's the point? Plus I can get good resale on my car now since I'm a neat freak. I also wouldn't want an insane monthly payment, I don't get how some people pay these ridiculous amounts that end up screwing them.

Guilty pleasure time. No, not what you're thinking. I'm moving along to music. 98% of the stuff I listen to is rap and R&B, but I try to branch out a little and give other things a try. This will come off sexist, but I usually can't stand chick singers or a chick being the lead singer. Yeah, there are definitely talented chick singers, I'm not saying that, but it's just not my cup of tea as to what I jam out to. Anyways, a new one I can handle to listen to, not sure about an entire CD, but that would be a group called Paramore. They've been around for a few years. Check out their song Misery Business. Also, something about the chick Hayley looking fairly dirty and coming with the freaky reddish hair, not bad. We'll weigh in if they have any other decent songs or if this is just a one time guilty pleasure.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/jrsygrl

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: This is a great find from my boy Corndog. I've never seen this before, maybe you all have, but it's hilarious I think. Kid is funny indeed. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahYgLP3RNug



3 Quick Thangs:

1. You want some birthdays for Friday, December 14th? Ok, I'll serve you up with something. Baseballer Billy Buckner, famous for the 1986 World Series error, but outside of that was an excellent player, he's 58. Future baseball Hall of Famer Craig Biggio, 42 and is one of the most underrated players in a while. We also have Anthony Mason, basketball tough guy from the 90s, known for shaving things in his head, 41. Walz is proud about that one. I'm not able to find much else today that is worthwhile other than sports names. That's all I have. Where do I get my birthdays from? I usually go here: http://brainyhistory.com/birthdays.html

2. An interesting stat told the other day while playing ball with Cousin Ozzie: Notre Dame football has a longer winning streak than each of the National Title game teams. No wonder things are screwed up. Go figure.

3. Anyone seen the latest pics of Mary-Kate Olsen? Brutal. Chick is 65 pounds, looks all coked up, and I'm not sure how to explain it. She's worse than she was a few months ago and I didn't think that could be possible. Maybe I'll put her in the 2008 Lobstah Deathpool that I take part in. Those picks are due in a few weeks actually. Yeah, I know it's totally wrong, but you can't lie and say you're not interested in competing in one of those. More on who I pick when I get those into Commish Kasher.

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