"Cause I'm A Ruthless Villain.."

February is in the books and the people are getting restless. Restless for what, I'm not quite sure yet, but we have them stirring either way. This edition will feature the following: Fruit farmers wizzing on their pickings, getting shot in the butt, hot nurses, Harry Potter is a gangster, Idol, and a lot of new CDs. And of course that's not all, it's just your quick preview to get the feet wet. Now it's time to dive in..



I've been on a big fruit kick of as late. I've always hit up a lot of fruit, but even more than usual the past month or so. I was in the kitchen hanging out on Thursday and eating some green grapes. I opened the package up and started tearing into them. My parents are big on washing the fruit off before eating it. It makes sense and most people would probably do that. Dad was saying how the fruit pickers are out there on the farms just wizzing onto the stuff we eat and we should wash it off. That cracked me up. Besides, it gets sprayed down enough over the time it gets to the store and the stores always spray it down too.

Last week I was due to get some new DVDs. I'm wondering if this next combination has been done before. I like my chances of no on this one. So what did I buy? Last Tuesday was when American Gangster came out, so I had to get that masterpiece. Again, if you haven't seen this movie yet, all hope may not be lost, because you can get it now. I've hyped it up enough in here, that's for sure. To go with that, I also bought the first two Harry Potter DVDs. The guy checking me out probably didn't know what type of person I was. As we say in the blog, I kept him on his feet and had him thinking all night on that one I'm sure. You get a kiddie movie mixed in with a movie blowing off heads and throwing f-bombs every 2.3 seconds, thumbs up from me.



Speaking of Harry, what'd I think? I realize I'm way behind everyone else on this series, but at least I'm still getting it. As far as the book goes, in Harry 7, I'm fairly close to wiping out that boy. Just about 100 more pages and I'm good as gold. With the movies, after reading the books, I didn't have high hopes. Most of your movies can't come anywhere even near what the actual book was like. However, I was definitely surprised by the Harry 1 DVD, it delivered. I've heard other people say the movies aren't that good, but after the first one, it's starting out very nice.

With March here, it's time to get pumped for fantasy baseball. I'm in two big leagues this year and they are both going to be competitive. I'm not in a money league for baseball, but ironically our free leagues are so tight that it's just as good. Unfortunately, in my area, it's tough to get a hardcore group of baseball fans that would stick with it. We have a handful, but that's about it who are true baseball guys. Then again, I'm a weird one that likes baseball much better than football, where everyone else seems to bow down to everything associated with football. I like football, but you know. And as everyone knows, basketball is by far my #1 sport to both follow and play. Anyways, I have 2 upcoming drafts.



One is a newly created league, League Freak with the commish being The_Freak as you would guess. It is a 14-man league and we draft on March 8th. Not many care, but I'm still going to list the people involved in this one. We have The_Freak, TheAnswer, Uncle Wilbur, Posey, Cork, MrsAnswer, Bono, Duce, Neon, ManDingo, Duce's Bro, myself, and 2 boys of The_Freak's. This one starts from scratch and isn't a keeper league, so that'll be fun for something different.

The other? It's the infamous American Baseball League (A#BL). This is ran from the blog's video producer, Kasher himself. This one features a whopping 18 people and it's a keeper league in existence since 2003. Both of these leagues have a lot of overlap, but once again, we'll break down who is part of this extravaganza: Kasher, DerekHood, Cork, Trev, Walz, ManDingo, TyLaw, Neon, Duce, Dack, Kris3, Dom, TMac, Blahah, Uncle Wilbur, Big Play Ray, Big Arlo, and myself. It's not even March and we're around 200 posts on our message board already, we get it done. In our basketball league, the A#BA, we have over 1500 posts from the season. No other Yahoo leagues can compete with us, I dare them to. My five keepers this year are Johan Santana, David Wright, Prince Fielder, Brandon Phillips, and Matt Kemp. The first four of those I feel are true absolute studs, so I'm ready to rock out a good draft on March 16th.



I'm recovered from my sickness of last week. Part of those was from my kids practically throwing up on me at work and the other half was getting a few hours of sleep a night I'm sure. I roll to the doctor on Friday after work since I was a zombie that day. Two good things while I was there. One is that I didn't have to wait at all, that's rare. Two, the nurses were hotties this time, how can you go wrong with that? I go in to get my blood pressure checked and all of that. Not one, but two nurses they send in to do that tough job, hah. I didn't mind though, half sick or not, that doesn't hurt things to look at some filthies. Then the doc was in for about 2.3 seconds and asked if I wanted a shot or just medicine instead. I asked what he recommended and he said the shot works instantly. I said, sign me up. Shots don't bother me at all like some people. I remember one time getting a poison ivy shot and this dumb chick broke the needle off in me. I just sat there and looked as stuff was shooting everywhere and she freaked. And you think I'm making this stuff up, but I'm not. This time,a third nurse comes, who also looks good, and does the honor of giving me a shot in the butt. She was instantly drawn to the Italian machismo oozing out of me as she gave that shot. Well, I'd like to think that anyways. Whatever it takes to get better.

We're now booting people on Idol left and right. This week, we booted 4 more, 2 dudes and 2 chicks. At the moment, I'm still rooting for Chikezie and my girl Asia'h. Who I really think has a shot to win on each side? I'm going with Aussie Boy on the dudes and Tattoo Chick on the chicks. Kid David has the chicks going wild though and makes Paula cry, so he should go far as well. The girls on Thursday, were way over the top drama queens, it was a mess. The Alaina girl that got booted, she broke down and said she wasn't gonna sing. Then she ended up singing, weird. I always like how the other contestants act like the world has ended when someone loses. Hey buddy, that helps you last at least another week, be happy. I'm sure they're friends, but there's only one winner and you have to be somewhat ruthless, Eazy-E style. Or as Eazy rightfully said in Ruthless Villain featuring MC Ren:

Cause I'm a ruthless villain,
Cold tearin' shit up,
Don't come on my face,
Pumpin' no kind of junk,
Eazy-E's in control,
And if you press your luck,
I'll smoke you like that,
And won't give a fuck.

I haven't put any old rap lyrics in here in a good while, so it was time. That leads us into newer things. We're due for some more CD updates. We're going all rap in this one, just bringing it with all sorts.

B.G. & The Chopper City Boyz: We Got This. This is mainly BG's boys doing the work, but he's in some of this as well. I'm big on the Louisiana style of rap anyways, so I wanted to pick it up. He's been under the radar lately, but I feel he's really good lyrically, one of the better ones of that bunch from the original Hot Boys.

Crucial Conflict: Planet Crucon. I've been waiting on Crucial to come out with something new for ages. They were one of my favorites in the mid 90s and this one showed why that is still true. For those who weren't around for their first run, load up on these guys from Chicago, very underrated. If you're into the quick raps with some added meanness, you can't go wrong here at all.

Jim Jones: Harlem's American Gangster. Stolen from Jay-Z's pull on the great movie mentioned above, Jim goes at Jay-Z a ton in this one. To me, and I like them, but all of the Dipset guys are the same. They don't distinguish from each other as much as they should. Not that it's bad, but it just seems like deja vu all over again.

Kool G Rap: Half A Klip. We're going with a legend here. You want some viciousness and straight street rap? This is what you're wanting to load up on for sure. Not a long CD, but it gets to the point and does its job, pick it up.

Pastor Troy: Attitude Adjuster. Troy is a guy you either love or hate. There's no in between. He's from the mean streets of the ATL, but doesn't do the club thing that so many other ATL guys do, so I'm down with him. He's gritty and goes at it, screaming half the time. Some can't get past his screaming, but it works in a mean way if you ask me. This one though, he impresses with more lyrical content. Songs to pick up from this CD? I'm Hot, Put Him On The Scope, and Dom would like to recommend For My Soldiers.



Sumthin Terrible: Turf Tested, Hood Approved. This is one of those times where I don't know the artists, but it's worth a try, what can it hurt? They're from Northern Cali, so of course I'm interested in rap from that area. The title sounded rough enough to see what it was all about. I haven't listened to this one yet except for a few tracks, but it seems worthy.

Young Gunz: Rapid Fire. I liked these guys a lot when Jay-Z brought them out a while back. They don't get a lot of love and I'm not even positive they're still with the Roc. They're now under Young Gunz Media as their label, so I'm not sure if that's a branch of the Roc or if they are on their own. Either way, the label isn't going to change my mind on these guys, they bring some talent and I liked this CD. Pretty crazy this is their fifth album and they're both only 23 years old. Yep, that makes me feel old.

Yukmouth: Million Dollar Mouthpiece. More Bay Area rap for the fans to feast on. If you go way back, Yuk was part of the Luniz. He's also a protege of my boy Dru Down, one of my all time picks. As an added bonus for me, Dru Down is on the track East Oakland. Devin The Dude and Crooked I also appear on this. Apparently this CD was 5 years in the making, did Yuk deliver as he usually does? He brings about the unique voice.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/nessquick

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: We're now ready for Kasher's segment and this one is genius. It's disturbing and something you won't want to watch at work or around too many people however, but it's downright funny. If you're a SuperBad fan, you'll know McLovin and his character. He's part of this vid entitled The Teabag Incident: http://spikedhumor.com/articles/144149/The-Teabag-Incident.html



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's start the month of March out right with our birthdays. Saturday, March 1st. Actor Alan Thicke of Growing Pains days, 61. Ron Howard, now director, but most know as Opie on The Andy Griffith Show, he's doing it for his 54th. Daisy Duke is also 54. NBA baller and a guy I always personally thank for my Heels winning the 1993 National Title, Chris Webber, Happy 35th. Zack of Saved By The Bell is now is 34. If that doesn't make my era feel old, I'm not sure what else will. We have a nice mix there, it's worthy of some mentions.

2. Here's today's weird stat: People who ride on roller coasters have a higher chance of having a blood clot in the brain. I guess I'm safe then from my brain exploding into 235 pieces.

3. I was driving home tonight and was behind this car at the stoplight. I'll end with the Potter kick since half the people reading hate that stuff, but I like it, so it's going in. I saw this bumper sticker that says "Republicans for Voldemort". Good stuff right there. I'm a Democrat and don't care one way or another if someone is Dem or Republican, that bumper sticker is creative. Has to be funny to the Potter fans. Also, thanks to Uncle Wilbur for the pics he sent on an email that we used this week.

Dodging Puke

How'd Valenine's Day treat the readers? Mine was the usual, more money in my pocket. Due to me rocking out the single life, there wasn't anyone that I had to spend on this year. I can handle that, less drama too. Now we have a big mix of nothing over the next month on the calendar. The rest of February surely doesn't have much. We're waiting around for March Madness and what else does March hold? Easter isn't until late March. We trek through the winter, with topics to pop up that we least expect.



Tuesday at work was interesting to say the least. By the time the day was over, my room was labeled the Hospital Ward. As a teacher, you're around sick little kids all the time. That's no biggie, right? You just deal with it and have a tolerance not to get sick from them in most cases. I don't have a lot of kids in my classes, but around my area, people are getting down with the sickness so to speak. First, I had this kid who had missed the past week for the flu and bronchitis. He shows up today and is a mess. He grinds through one subject and then has no energy left and starts to get sick again. The next is a kid that didn't look good as soon as he walked in. He was in a hurry and asked to go to the bathroom. A few minutes later, he's back and says he threw up all over the place. Then he runs back down there and it's out of both ends. Just what you wanted to know I'm sure, but it sets things up for our story.

The same kid is coughing, spitting up junk and waiting on a ride to come pick him up in an hour. So that means he'll hang in my room for an hour. He starts to lay down and then asks if he can borrow the garbage can. Great. So he goes into the corner and kind of hangs out, puking up his guts. Then he goes to the bathroom again and says a lot of it got on the floor, plus he needs a change of pants. You kidding me? Yep, that's where your tax dollars go to for the teachers. We dodge puke all day long. A third kid was medicated up fairly well and he was a zombie after a change of his usual pattern. So he was zonked for most of the day. I usually don't write many stories about work, but if I don't get sick from all of this, I'll be a machine.



Speaking of being a machine, it's time to revisit my sleeping schedule. I'll start from last week and lead up till earlier this week. Tuesday night, I roll to bed at 2:00 AM and wake up at 6:00 AM. Wednesday night, I go to bed at 2:00 and wake up at 6:00 again. Thursday night, I tap out at 2:30 and wake up at 6:00 again. So Friday I'd come home and get a big nap, right? Nope, for some reason I toughed it out. Due to that, I'd go to bed early, correct? Wrong again, I end up staying up all night and going to bed at 8:30 AM. The next day I sleep till 2:00, only 5½ hours, not what I wanted, but it happens. Saturday night, I roll to bed at 3:30 and wake up at 12:00 to play ball. Finally a decent night of sleep. Sunday night and I'm wanting to start the work week off with a normal bed time. What do I do? 3:00 AM and wake up at 6:00, doh. I come home and get a nap? No, I go workout and have a pretty good one. Monday night I go to bed at 12:30, not bad at all. Tuesday evening, I nap from 4:00-5:30. I'm ready to rock. You know the moral, I don't have to even say it.

I'm a big Idol fan, too big for most reading probably since most don't care. What I don't like is all of these 2 hour episodes. One a week may be ok, but not twice. Then on Thursday, we get an hour long results show. I can imagine how the average bum fans would tune out when the hardcores are thinking it's a bit much. With that, I may cut back on the Idol opinions for a few weeks and let the chopping block come to get rid of some of these bums of the Final 24. From last week, my boy Josiah, the kid who quit school and lives in his car, he gets cut. I thought that would've been a classic story to follow through the season, plus he had talent, but the judges didn't think he was good enough. After the first week that made the cuts to 24, at this point, who am I rooting for? This will change a zillion times, but on the guys side I'm pulling for the infamous Chikezie Eze. On the girls, I'm going with the hottie known as Asia'h. Now it's time for me to pick what 2 guys and 2 girls get booted on Thursday night: Jason Yeager, Luke Menard, Amy Davis, and Kady Malloy.



One thing Asia'h did did last week that I wasn't big on was her hair. This will be a separate topic all together. Rant time! I don't know much about hairstyles and what the actual terms are, but you'll know what I'm talking about. Let's take a chick with long hair first off (my #1 turn-on probably). Then she takes the front of her hair and just throws that junk up to the middle and she looks like a rooster. You take the bangs or all of the front and just shove it up into a pile of mess. I don't get it, you see TONS of chick rocking this horrible look out and you get the hair stuck up with all you see is an ugly forehead. But why? I'm a simple guy when it comes to chick hair, leave it down and preferably straight. That brings us to Corndog..

He brought up a good idea the other day while we were chatting around. He said I should interview random bums or people I know and just go with a new theme every now and then. I should probably try that when I'm out of ideas. Either way, since we're talking about hair, Corndog wants to give the world some of his wisdom and expertise: "If a a girl is gonna be annoying, she better be really good looking". That's pretty good words to live by if you ask me. That's all free of charge from Corndog himself, he's gonna have to start charging soon.



You want something quick and easy to kill time? Well, for sports fans anyways that have too much time on their hands online. That would be a site called Cyberdunk. This was brought to our attention from none other than Dom of #basketball fame, straight out of Germany. Who would've guessed that a dude in the middle of nowhere in Shinnston would have people in Germany reading this thing? Aside from Dom, I also get a lot of regular feedback from Kristen, a Florida transplant who is now in Germany. Small world out there. Ok, enough rambling. I'm not sure how long the craze can last, but it's going pretty strong with my crew. It is a MMORPG, a Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. Basically, you create your own basketball player. You choose what country he's from, position, and then go into a draft. You are then drafted by a country's division. After that, there's a lot of things to do to build your player up. You set him up with contracts, gear, skills on the court, and go after being the man. Give it a try if you're a sports fan, it's strangely addicting even though it sounds simple.

I haven't done a CD update in here in a good while. I've been slacking in getting some new songs to the collection, but we have a small one to mention by having two new ones:



Raheem DeVaughn: Love Behind The Melody. If you're into pimpin' R&B, this guy from Newark, New Jersey is definitely worthy of checking out. The song he has out now that you've heard would be Woman. iTunes had it as their #1 single of the week at the end of January for whatever that's worth. I haven't heard the whole CD yet, but what I have, it's not too shabby at all. I know it's a week after Valentine's Day, but the ladies will appreciate it. Once again, this advice is free of charge. Raheem received a Grammy nomination for this year.

Lupe Fiasco: The Cool. Maybe you didn't get his first CD when it came around, but now is your chance to pick up this one. This Chicago cat features some smooth lyrics and stays away from going at people or being negative. I classify him as happy rap as me and my boys would say. He's real good though and creative, hopefully he starts to make a bigger name. His song last year, Kick Push, was nominated at most of the awards shows. As I type this, his current single Superstar is on TV now as the #1 song on BET's 106 & Park.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/larosered

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: I went back to the Lobstah archive to dig this up. It's from 2005 and credit goes to our video producer, Kasher: http://leenks.com/media432.htm



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try some birthdays for Friday, February 22nd. We start out with a basketball legend, Dr. J. He turns 58 on this day. I would've guessed a bit older. Golfer Vijay Singh, he's now 45. He's one of the best out there, but I always cracked up at his comparisons with Tiger. Get out of here, nobody can hold Tiger's jock. Former tennis stud little guy, Michael Chang, 36. It seems like he's been away for ages. How short a tennis career ends. Actress Drew Barrymore, 33, but has probably been through enough to be 80. I think she still looks real nice though. We'd also like to send the birthday wishes out to Cousin Ozzie, he's doing it big on the 23rd! Have a good one man!

2. Feeling all stuffed up? Here's one you'll have to try. I've probably mentioned it before in here, but I'm half sick at the moment (guess I'm not a machine like I was writing above) and don't remember. What you need to do is throw one of these bad boys into the shower with ya. It's a big tablet and it helps you breathe. I know, it sounds stupid, but it works. Shower Soothers: http://www.pfizerch.com/product.aspx?id=531

3. It's time to brush up on your skills. This fact is a historical one. Australia accounts for 5.3% of the world's land mass. Who leads? Asia with a cool 30%.

Chikezie Eze from Inglewooood!

Last week I was under deep pressure to get the blog out on a certain date from MrsAnswer on her birthday. I delivered with that, so this week I had to come back to my senses. It's time to relax and just go with the flow. Now that it's nearing upon 2 weeks, I'm having the fans demand more. It was slack time and I need to get the ball rolling again. I've already heard from Corndog and Carolina that are fired up, dedicated readers, so I best get to typing out something good, it's what they want. See, that's just a reason to get some characters into the blog. JK Rowling has nothing on me, you know you want to find out more on such people as Corndog and Carolina, so stay tuned.



I'm going to start out with a good story from my boy Clark. His uncle just finished up his degree and he either is writing a book or this is part of a paper he had to write. Growing up, my Dad (everyone knows him as Dude if you were wondering when ya read this section) was older than Clark's uncle, but they were around the same group of buddies and neighborhood. Hot Sam is my uncle when you get to that part for the non-locals who don't know the crew. First off, it makes it easier to write the blogs when people give me ideas. Most times I can think of something, but every now and then, I go into a brain freeze. That's where Clark comes into the mix, so props to him on sharing this story:

Clark (7:12:21 PM): Not much ... I have a story for ya
Clark (7:12:57 PM): My Uncle Pat just finished up a college degree to become a librarian and he just sent my mom a Word file called Ch. 1
Clark (7:13:43 PM): I'm not sure if he is writing a book or if this was part of an assignment he had due, but he talks about the Mahlon Street Gang ... and has a part in there about your dad
Clark (7:14:35 PM): It's about 14 lines, so I'll type in a sentence or two and let you read along ... let me know when you are ready
Me (7:14:43 PM): Go for it, that's great.
Clark (7:15:31 PM): Prelude ... he just got done taking about Johnny Bruce or otherwise known by his locally famous sobriquet of "Hot Sam"
Clark (7:16:36 PM): Dude is his older brother, and lucky for the rest of us he was about 7 years older and didn't hang around with us too much. He did pause long enough to teach us his rules of wiffle ball, touch football, and "Dude ball".
Clark (7:17:29 PM): Dude ball consisted of five or six of us younger guys lined up against a wall in a postage stamp size yard with our faces to a wall, while he would wing a ball at us.
Clark (7:18:10 PM): You were not allowed to peek. Dude's rule. Another one of Dude's pastimes was having us run up Mahlon Street while he shot at us with a BB gun.
Me (7:18:24 PM): Hah! That's classic right there.
Clark (7:18:50 PM): I was excused from this test of young manhood when my sister, Ann, came out and explained to Dude that he would not be using me for a target.
Clark (7:19:52 PM): He would ask my mother to go bird hunting with him, and one time when our front door was left open, he fired a shot into a white plastic planter in our front hall. He was the one who hung the unfortunate name of "Maynard: on David Riley.
Clark (7:20:35 PM): As I said earlier, lucky for us he was older and that he quit bothering with us about the time his parents sent him to Hargrave Military Academy
Clark (7:20:49 PM): Last part is a good one too ... here
Clark (7:21:41 PM): In the eighth grade, I had to do a report on a neighborhood hero as part of my preparation for the Golden Horseshoe test. I chose Dude. My mom suggested other people.
Me (7:22:12 PM): That end line is great.
Clark (7:22:33 PM): I thought it was great ... my mom sent it with Payton's Valentine's Day gift ... It's about 9 nine pages and just a snipit of a look into his past ...I thought you would enjoy.
Me (7:22:55 PM): That's blog style right there, sounds like he's pretty good. I'll have to use that.

Now time for last week's Idol Recap. The fans can't wait to read, while the people who bash it still read as well. We have a good mix. We're in the Dirty Dirty, the ATL for the first night. Josh the glassmaker is the first person to go. His eyes freak them out and they have him sing with their back to them. Simon is frightened, but the others vote him on. JP was 2 seats away from Carrie Underwood in Season 4. He claims to be a music major and he's awful. Asia'h, her dad died 2 days ago and she comes in to do it. Asia'h huh? Weird. Anyways, she's hot and gets through since the judges like her singing and her story. Paula has to walk away from bawling. Miss South Florida is a dumb blonde, but makes it. A good singer. "Possibly the most annoying person I have ever seen in my life."- Simon. Eva busts herself while singing and Simon says she's putting on an act. He tells her to come to him and say she's serious. She says she still loves Simon though. Alex, a 16-year old chick comes in with a posse and 93-year old grandma. She's in for sure and granny is pumped. Nathan says he's 16 and a 9th grade repeat student. Simon says it's a bedroom audition. Him and Simon go at it, he cracked me up. Seacrest asks what a bedroom audition is. "Maybe it's the fact that I refused to spoon with him that he called it that."- Nathan. Amanda is a biker chick/nurse and Randy gives it a trillion percent yes. Paula says she's the real deal and the female Daughtry. She's hardcore and impressive. Josiah dropped out of school and has slept in his car for the last 10 months. He loves living in his car and goes around playing shows. His family has no clue he's living in his car and breaks down crying. He's American, but sings with a British accent. He's my favorite of ATL just because he's interesting, but has talent too.

Second night. Amy Davis, busting out. Plus, she can sing. That's not a bad combo if you ask me. Tiffany, the gospel singing chick just starts breaking the sound barrier. Crazy loud, not good, and her voice wasn't from god like she mentioned. We get twin brothers who had the same girlfriend. Yep, it's as weird as it sounds. She was with one bro before and now has been with the other for the past year. They do this rap duo and were laughed at. The girlfriend comes in next and she's way hot. She brings in a dog for brownie points. We get another dumb blonde and she is bad. "Can I be honest with you? It was excruciating!"- Simon. The twins say behind her back that they told her she was great, but they go back on that word. Cardin is up next. Cardin? Where are these names coming from this year? As Answer told me the other day, these prelim shows go on a few weeks too long. The bums are fun to watch for a bit and then it's more of the same. Joanne is next and she sang the anthem at MSG for the college hoops tourneys. Randy says she must be big time, they send her on. Alesha comes out and sounds like a little kid. Simon says it's dreadful. Randy says she sounds like Dolly Parton and he tells her to come back and sing a Dolly song. She came back and did much better, but Simon still hates it. They send her to Hollywood. Then Simon admits that Paula was right. "Jay Smoove" is a mix of a Kanye/Lupe Fiasco guy. He throws around glitter and rose petals for the ladies. Simon says it was over the top corny. Chikezie Eze from Inglewood, always up to no good. I honestly can't make up these names. He hits up some soul music and jams. I'm a fan. Danny Noriega comes up next with a gangsta name, but is far from it, I think he likes dudes, bad times. Anyways, he has a big voice for a dork. Randy approves of his singing.



Rob & Big you wonder? Last week, the theme is each of them want to get into the Guinness Book of World Records. Rob is after skateboarding and Big with food. Big breaks the peeling 2 bananas in a minute and eating all the way, he had 3 easily. Rob sets 19 world records. This goes to show you how many records are easy to break in the book, so you might as well get your certificate and name in the book, why not? Next week we Rob in a fat suit and he gets to feel what it's like to be Big.

Time for an update on drinks. Since I'm not an alcohol guy at all, let me add my expertise on Gatorade. Anyone tried the new Gatorade G2? This is a low calorie version. I figured I'd get it one day after work just to check it out and see what the hype was about. A big thumbs down from me. On first impression, it's too watered down for my standards since I'm used to regular style Gatorade. Some may like it, but I can't see myself getting this anytime soon. It's drinkable, barely I guess, but I'd steer you away from it, even if my boy Jeter advertises it.



Since I've had my new laptop, I've had issues with the built-in webcam it has. For some reason, it wouldn't recognize it at times and I'd have fits with it. When it worked, it did fine, but I had to switch over to the regular style of cams. The latest addition is a Logitech QuickCam Communicate STX Plus. This thing seems pretty smooth so far and it's real easy to setup. See, we're not just about watching TV and sports in here, we cover all bases of interest. Now you wanna go out there and buy this webcam. Kick over the Gatorade G2 when you see it on the shelves and save your money for this bad boy.

You know one thing I don't get? I've probably spouted off on this before, but hopefully not. It's when people read off of notes. I'm basically talking about speeches. Why can't some people just get up there and wing it? Make it natural instead of something so cut and dry that it serves no purpose. I realize at times it's necessary, but not too often. You see this at graduations, churches, and on TV. I want someone at a graduation to step up one day and say this line: "Everyone else before me did ok, I respect that. However, I'm just going to tell things how it is and not read off some stupid card. This is going to come from my actual opinions and not what someone else may have written up. Then maybe you people may actually pay attention."



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: We're going with another fan suggestion. This week's edition comes to us from The_Freak. http://www.myspace.com/ooosexxxestooo

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: I'm not sure why this is funny to me, but it just is. http://youtube.com/watch?v=pOuumGX-6uc



3 Quick Thangs:

1. It's birthdays you want, it's birthdays you shall get. Let's go with Wednesday, February 13th. That also happens to be my parents' 37th anniversary, dang. Jerry Springer starts us off, he's now 64. Coach K of Duke, 61. I wouldn't have guessed quite that old, but he's doing it and should be the winningest coach in history before all is said and done. Rocker Peter Gabriel, I guess he was relevant in one time, he's doing it for his 58th. Henry Rollins who just screams and is a roid freak, 47. Randy Moss, straight out of West Virginia, 31. No locals to mention today or internet legends, but I'll give out an early shoutout to Bono of #basketball fame, Happy Birthday on the 17th!

2. American Gangster comes out on DVD next Tuesday, February 19th. You better load up, whether you've seen it or not. One of the best movies from 2007, the best I've seen for sure.

3. In the "I learn something everyday" genre, Jas gives us this one. Maybe I'm the only one that isn't up on this, but it's something to think of. Apparently, when you put a crab into a bucket, it will climb out of there. No biggie, right? Then, supposedly when you put 2 in the same bucket, they'll be stuck in there forever as they bring each other down. Hey, I didn't test it out, but I'll take Jas' word for it since she's all smart and stuff, hah. Until next time...

Vegas, Idol, & Meaty Munchies

I have pressure on me for this blog to get it out by Friday. I lied, I guess the last one wasn't the final post of January. How about a 4 day turnaround since the last post? That's not too shabby and here's why: As I said, there was pressure for me to get a blog in, if I don't, word has it that MrsAnswer will send her Vegas posse out here to club me upside the head and put me down for the count. Also, the reason is that it's her birthday, so I better stay on her good side with this one before she breaks bad. Happy Birthday Jamie, have a good one out there rockin' it out! Take care of my boy Answer out there and maybe for one day, you can pretend to be a Ric Flair fan, just admit it. :) That's right, I gotta keep the loyal readers happy, that's what we do around here. It's time to get on with the blog..



We're back for this week's Idol recap. Like it or not, you're getting it on a regular basis. Tuesday and we go to Omaha, Nebraska of all places. Chris comes on and is way too happy. He cries for getting the chance and is a Kelly Clarkson freak. He totally bombs. He then offers to be at the finale to help announce from the red carpet. Simon tells him to go to his local FOX station and tell them to make them their reporter for Idol, weird. Jason Rich (not JRich of the Charlotte Bobcats) had to try a lot of times due to nerves, but turned out to be good and they pass him through. Paula walks in late after her plane was delayed. More like she was smoking crack, but they tell us the plane excuse. Arm Wrestling Chick makes it through. She challenges everyone outside to arm wrestle and she's won 6 tournaments for whatever that's worth. She then beat crackhead Paula in about 1.3 seconds. Seacrest and Paula switch spots and Ryan comes in to judge. Seacrest is ran after one judge session and Paula is back to put Samantha through, a little hottie and one of the better singers of Day 1.

David Cook gets inspiration from Daughtry. His hair is like a rooster. He hits up some Bon Jovi and nails it. He goes through and is very good. I feel like a dorky judge giving these meaningless opinions, but oh well. Johnny Bananas (not to be confused with the Gauntlet III's version) comes out in a James Brown gold glitter jacket and starts dancing around. He says he might be the strangest person out there, said that himself. Leo comes in from a town of 200 people and some humor. The judges love him and he might be the best from Omaha.



Wednesday night and we're coming from Miami for this Idol session. We go from the middle of nowhere in Omaha to living it up in Miami, what a change. The first person was Shannon, a meat cutter. "And you handle meat?.. that's what it says here."- Simon. She was rough, even though she has singing titles as a kid. She doesn't make it. Robbie, a former boy band guy tries to do rock. He hits up some Skynard and is good. He makes it on. Ghaled, a Venezuelan dude is up and has charisma. They pass him on, but they tell him to try to lose the accent. Two huge chicks (Corliss and Brittany) come out together and one likes skinny dudes and another likes bigger guys. One sings to Randy and one to Simon. I'm not sure if it's a stereotype or not, but it seems the huge chicks over the past few years can sing it. They both make it on easy and have the talent to get it done. A single mom who was pregnant at 18 steps up. She cries that she has it so rough, weird hair, but makes it and goes wild. "She is.. interesting."

Remiele wants to be the first asian Idol winner. I'm on record to say that I'm not big on being attracted to most asian chicks, but the ones that do look good are worthy. This one here is on that list, she's tiny. I think Paula wants her. Syesha has a story of her dad getting out of a drug and alcohol center and is pumped to be on the show. Randy says she's one of the best they've seen on the show this year. It seems that we see the same audition songs every year. Who names their kid Ilsy? What's that? Some chick that was Top 20 of American Juniors (I don't even know of that show) when she was 12 came on. The kid turns out to not be any good and is a typical dumb blonde. They tell her she was acting and she freaks out that they didn't like her. Comedian Brandon comes in and isn't funny. He has this half wannabe gangsta vibe and is creative, but tried to get by on comedy and it didn't work. I'm gonna miss the bum characters in a few weeks when people get put on the chopping block.



So I'm almost done with the Harry Potter saga. I just dusted off Book 6, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. This book was very detailed and set a lot of the major storylines in the past up. My only complaint was the ending was quickly done. They basically end with Harry being all fired up and says he's not going back to school again, blah blah. Also, all book, Harry wanted to get in Ginny's pants. At the end, he tells her that for her safety, they probably should end it. She doesn't want to, so there you have a cliffhanger. Book 7 is in the house now, even if I am behind the rest of the world in reading it. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I've heard a lot of good about this one, so we'll see. I'm still partial to the earlier books, but all have been tremendous. Laugh all you want for the non-believers that don't want to give it a try. I've still yet to see a movie of the series, but the movies are never better than the book.

I'm also in the middle of reading a lot of other things. If I concentrated on one thing, I'd be in business, but I keep the action flowing. Currently I'm reading up on A Lion's Tale by Chris Jericho. I've mentioned that a few weeks ago, but so far, it's an awesome wrestling book. It's filled with wild stories and Jericho is one funny guy in how he tells his life story. Outside of that, I'm always up to date on the latest Wrestling Observer Newsletter, the bible of wrestling and MMA news. I've been saying all along, if you're a wrestling or MMA fan and don't have a subscription, something is definitely wrong, it's that good. Then we have my magazines that I frequent and it's a lot of readage for this fella. Yep, readage sounds good to me, so I'll use it.



What's up in the workout routine as of late? I try to stay active and have something going on as far as that goes. I'm not one of these guys that is going to say how jacked they are, because I'm a little dude. I feel I'm in real good shape, but I'm no beast by any means. Here is how I've been breaking things down over the past few weeks and I hope to keep it as it works fine. Monday, run. Tuesday, workout. Wednesday, play ball. Thursday, workout. Friday, run. Saturday, workout and run. Sunday, play ball. Monday, all over again. I'm also due for another batch of supplements. At the beginning of every month, GNC has the setup for their gold card members where you can save big. Of course, since you read the blog, you know I'm a sucker for bargains and will probably be there loading up this weekend. The items I have marked would be Pro Performance 24-Hour Protein Complex and also a product called Amplified Creatine 189. The protein is in powder form and the creatine in tablets. That's if they don't sell out on the first day, because on Gold Card weeks, stuff goes crazy fast.

Rob & Big update. The show starts with the crew putting Meaty in a pink wig. They go shopping and see this box of cereal with a picture of two older ladies, one black and one white. They think of an idea from that and call the company up. They mention that they'd be perfect for their company's ads. They're out with Meaty and he attracts the chicks. Maybe I should get a dog and try that trick. They go to Le Paws, a dog talent agency. They see an animal trainer there and she asks if they've done anything with him. They say they haven't even got him to sit. They say to come back when he gets some discipline. They tell him he might be able to do some dog food ads. They get Meaty hooked up with Natural Balance and get some pics taken. He's on the cover of a tube called Meaty Munchies. Big tries some of the meat and says it tastes like jerky. In a random note, I tried Pupperoni back in the day at Spank's and it was pretty rough, even though it smelled and looked good. Worth a try though. Next week they try to figure out world records to break and also bust out more net gun action.



An update on the 2008 Lobstah Celebrity Deathpool? Through the first month of the year, nobody has earned any points. I guess that's good since none of the celebs picked in our group have died yet. In a demented way, for some, it's also bad since they haven't died either. See how this is a lose/lose situation? Or is it a win/win? My lock of the year, wrestling manager Bobby "The Brain" Heenan is going through multiple surgeries. He's still in the hospital and will be for quite some time. Nobody had Heath Ledger if anyone wondered, he would've been worth 72 points. Messed up, I know, but I'm sure someone out there was thinking if anyone had him. I'll update this periodically.

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: I couldn't find this chick's main link, so I'm going with the long version. It should still work: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=3030726

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: This comes from our video producer of the blog, Kasher. He's back with another find: http://youtube.com/watch?v=cUEkOVdUjHc



3 Quick Thangs:

1. It's happy happy time! Let's try some birthdays for Friday, February 1st. We start off with two what ifs. What if Boris Yeltzin and Rick James were still alive? I'm here to answer that. Yeltzin would be 77, while "I'm Rick James, bitch!" would've been 60. Now to people that are actually breathing. Lisa Marie Presley, daughter of Elvis of course, 40. Then we get what started the reason for today's blog, Happy Birthday MrsAnswer! Outside of that, there's basically nothing going on for famous birthdays. I could dig way deep and find some bum level celebs, but they don't count around here.

2. Want a website to try? It doesn't look like much, but it's kind of addicting for something quick. For each word you get right, you donate 20 grains of rice to help out hunger. No clue if it's legit or not, but check it out. Highly recommended from Jas, so she gets credit for the mention: http://www.freerice.com

3. Want today's fact? We're going with animal insight to give ya some education. An octopus has 3 hearts and can squeeze through a hole the size of a dime. Hapalochlaena species can inject enough venom in one bite to kill several adult humans.

Are You Tough Enough??

We're back for what will be the last post of January. It's 34 degrees right now as I type this, a big heat wave from the weather we got here last week. I'm a cold weather guy for sure, one of those weirdos, but I realize 34 is still way cold for most. With that in mind, get a big heaping cup of hot chocolate, stay in the house all day, and check out the latest from the world of my blog. In this one we get some good stories from this weekend's Toughman Contest, Idol, Rob & Big, a guaranteed way to clear your sinuses, movie reviews, and who knows what else.



Are you tough enough?? Yep, that's the famous question in my area around this time of year. Friday night I hit up the 29th annual North Central WV Toughman Contest. If you're in the area and have never been, you are truly missing out on a crazy, yet fun experience. You get your money's worth and then some when you hit up this action. Along for the ride on this trip is my boy Spank and we had real nice seats. Our seats were on the stage, so we were away from the crowds where people were sitting on top of each other and dripping sweat all night. In my opinion, Friday night is where it's at. That's when you get a lot of mismatches and guys who frankly have no business inside a boxing ring. The event started at 7:30 and we got out of there around midnight. I'm guessing there were at least 40 different fights. In a note, this is not a place you want to take your chick to because that's an easy fight starter.

Now to set the tone, especially for the ones reading outside of WV. Most of the time, we try to stay away from the typical WV stereotype, but this building brings it back in time. 80% of the place, if not more, was total white trash. Mix that in with serving alcohol and it's an absolute madhouse, a la The Madhouse of Bird33 you are reading. Anyways, 10 minutes into being there, I already had beer spilled on me, but that's part of the game. A lot of fun is in the crowd itself, you get just as much going on there as you do inside the ring. Take this example for one. I was one row behind the best crowd fight of the night. These two drunken chicks who were obliterated were part of the festivities. One claimed the other stole her scarf. Weird already, right? The next thing I know, right in front of me, this chick picks up her chair, slams it down, kicks another down and then slams down another. It was on! The entire place turns to our section and is going nutty. Then the chicks started duking it out, the fighters run over to watch and then security finally breaks it up. You'd think the chicks would be immediately thrown out of the building. Come on, this is WV, think again. The security guy let them stay in the same area the rest of the night, they were 2 seats away from each other. And you think I'm kidding you.



Another interesting thing was the girl selection of the night. I'm talking absolutely brutal. I saw just a few girls in the entire place that I thought actually looked good. The rest were tatted up drunks who were making fools of themselves. I'll pass those off to someone else. But, the ring girls had to be very hot, right? Guess again. The theme with that each year is that at a local bar, they get all the local dirties to get in the contest. They narrow it down to four for the weekend show. Out of those four, one was smokin' hot, just not even on the level of girls in my area. The other three, it looked like they got into the ring for 12 rounds, and that's as nice as I can be on those. We had this one chick who was probably 6'0"/110 maybe, crazy anorexic looking and with the worst ass I've maybe ever seen. Well, not sure how I can judge it since it was flat as a board. The story with her is that she took her top off at the bar competition to make it to the Final Four. She should keep it on. Then we had another chick that Spank called Peg Leg. How so? As far as dirty stripper looking girls, the worst dancer I've seen. She'd come out for her round card duties and do the same thing all night long. What she would do is kinda bounce on her legs and not really bend, with her legs being straight. Then Spank wondered if these girls' parents were in the crowd tonight, hah. Where else can you get the truth told to you about the Toughman Contest? Forget the local paper's writeup, you get the fans view here.

The fight part of the night though, good stuff. Of course you had your bums who would get in, some of them half drunk. Those guys got rocked. The cardio shape most of these guys were in, embarrassing. I guess I have to give them credit for having the balls to get out there though, that's something. Our seats were right next to the area where the boxers were at between fights. We would get some good stories and knew some of the fighters, so they'd fill us in on anything going down. One of my favorite things of the fight section was the second fight of the night. It reminded me of wrestling in that the guy gets popped in the face, and then bounces off the ropes. As he bounces back, his opponent at full force just destroys him into what looked like a near coma, out. There were probably a good ten fights where the guy was getting beat down so bad that he tapped out and quit. Once that happens, the redneck crowd hounds them big time with boos and cusses him like a dog. Last through what you can, you can't tap in a toughman, get with it. Another interesting thing is the kiddies that just turned 18 and think they can whip the world. You all remember them in high school. So they get this bright idea to enter the contest. In most cases, it's pure punishment they receive from older veteran fighters. They bring their posse to cheer in the crowd and then end up walking out with their head down, facing reality.



I know a lot reading this aren't big Idol fans. I guess you'll just have to deal and read through my thoughts for the next few months. I make it interesting enough that I keep the updates coming. Tuesday night's show was the San Diego crew. Tatiana is way hot and is the first to advance. Simon says she's obnoxious, but good. Then we get a single father named Perrie. He's 27 and his wife was shot down a few years ago. He rocked out Boyz II Men and was the best of Tuesday night in my opinion. Then we get an Aussie named Michael who does some Otis Redding. Simon says he's like a white soul singer and advances him. Valerie is this 20-year old Mariah Carey freak and she makes fun of past years' bums. She claims she won't be one as well, but she turned out to be a mess. "The only resemblance to Mariah Carey is if you left her CD out in the sun for one year and played it."- Simon. Monique butchers Whitney Houston and keeps trying to sing different songs. She breaks down crying. Her buddy, Chris, who works with her, he's also horrible and tries to keep singing. Samantha is this hottie that comes in with her sis. They both are obsessed with Simon and tell him he's really hot. Simon invites the sis to come vote with them and she sits on his lap. The judges were impressed with the Samantha girl and both sisters hug Simon.

Day 2 of San Diego and we start it off with a recurring character. In Season 5, he was the Statue of Liberty Guy. He's auditioned in 10 cities and fails yet again. Alberto is this weird shy guy and wants to feel free. He makes his own song and you can barely hear him. Simon says it's probably the most depressing song he's ever heard. David is this 16-year old kid who had a paralyzed vocal cord a few years ago. He says he's recovered and the judges end up loving him. Irish Carly on Season 5 was disqualified after they voted her through due to not renewing her visa. She has an arm sleeve tat (I'm not a big tat fan, but something about arm sleeve tats make a chick look mean and not to be messed with) and her man has his entire face tatted up. She gets 3 yes votes and is off to Hollywood.



South Carolina is Night 2. Rashard with a big fro and he says they call him the Black Clay Aiken. He doesn't make it. Deanna from Kellie Pickler's town. She didn't make it either. Crystal and Randy (a bum, not Jackson) met on an Idol message board and come to audition together. They do a song together and it's rough. Michelle and Jeffery, an over the top sis/bro duo. Both advance, the bro is real good. Cheerleader chick talks about abstinence. Simon says people are going to find her very annoying. "I think you have mad potential. Mad potential!"- Randy.

Day 2 of SC. Lyndsey, an Air Force pilot starts out this group. Aretha (named after Aretha Franklin) says she stops crowds with her singing. Simon says she murdered the song and the crowds disappear. Judges all didn't like it, but I thought she did fine. Josh puts way too much yelling and screaming in his song and it's a mess. He says the show is fake and rigged. Oliver was to audition one day, but his wife had to go into labor as he was in line. He got another chance and comes in with the chick and baby. I thought he was great, but I guess that's why I'm not a judge because they all told him no. Go figure.



Rob & Big this week, very good. Much better than Week 2. This week's theme was the mini horse competition. They want to bring flare to it by getting outfits and the whole nine yards. Mini is out after they sent him to boarding school, but his behavior is worse since he's been back. "Ain't nobody riding to the mini horse show with their mini in the back seat!"- Rob. They then start up a 400-mile excursion to get to this show. Rob pays some random chick $100 to watch Mini and Meaty (the dog) while they go off to ride dune buggies for a bit. After that, they each hit up a couples mud bath out of nowhere and act like kids. Seriously, these guys get paid to hang out and do absolutely nothing. A pro horse person said their horse was ghetto and needed its hair fixed to be allowed in the competition. They get cowboy outfits with rhinestones. Mini didn't want to run as much in the middle, but they still say he's #1. They end up getting an 8th Place ribbon for Mini G as they were calling him. Thumbs up to the episode, it's worth checking out on the website if you didn't see on TV. Next week, they try to get Meaty in some ads.

Anyone out there have really bad sinuses? I have the solution for you. This was a recommendation from my Aunt Susie, so I figured I'd give it a try. It couldn't hurt, that's for sure. The product is called the NetiPot. It basically looks like a little flower pot, except you fill it up with warm water and these salt packets. It's a strange concept because you put it up one side of your nose and it drains out the other. I'm telling you though, it opens you up immediately and is easy to use. Don't knock it till you try it because now I'm hooked and you'll be the same once you give it a try: http://netipot.org



It's time to gripe about something. You know what makes me livid? It's these geeks who have their phone or mp3 players attached to their ears. I don't get it. You know what I mean, the ones that clip onto their ear. You see people in the mall with them on, in their cars, etc. I know it's hands free and all, but come on. Basically, that is saying to the rest of the people looking at them, "Hey, look at me! I'm starving for attention!" Maybe I don't get the purpose and they are actually worth having, but these people look like fools out there. I can't be the only person who thinks that way.

Saturday night, it was movie time in Morgantown. Rambo! If you're a fan of the old Rambo movies, you're going to like this. I enjoyed it a lot, even if the acting and storyline weren't detailed. Going in, you know exactly what you're going to get though. Pure action, killing nonstop, and total violence. I'm going to rate this movie a 7.25, go check it out. In attendance for the movie was Cork, Spank, and myself. After that, we hit up IHOP with the same trio as well as Cork's girl Kristin. I tried a new combo they have and it rocks. Strawberry Banana French Toast Triangles. I'm talking excellent.



Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: Props for this one goes to my girl Jas in Arizona. Also, Answer said last week's ho wasn't worthy enough since she was from Australia, who knows. Hopefully this one is dirty enough: http://www.myspace.com/jassy17. I see now she has it private though and it does he no justice, but she did have some trashy pics up earlier in the week before it went private, doh. Here's an other just to double up: http://www.myspace.com/reddiray305

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: This is a video courtesy of Duce that was posted in Lobstah, our world famous message board. Kasher says it has to be staged and I figure he's probably right, but it's worth seeing for the short clip: http://youtube.com/watch?v=BzjLlqIuVhI




3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try some birthdays for Monday, January 28th. We have some garbage in this one. None of these are even close to big time stars, but we'll go through it anyways. Singer Sarah McLachlan, 40. See, I told you that it's gonna be a rough one. Mo Rocca, some guy who thinks he's funny and is on all of those VH1 shows, 39. Singer Brad Paisley, 36. Actor Joaquin Phoenix, he's doing it for his 34th. Who names their kid Joaquin? Former Celtic Tony Delk, he's also 34. I only put him in here since I met him before, no biggie. American Idol fro boy, Justin Guarini, 30. Backstreet Boy Nick Carter, 28. And last, we have Elijah Wood, actor that is now 27.

2. On Friday night/Saturday morning, I went to bed at 11:30 AM. Yep, I know. All week before I had been going to bed at a normal time for myself and then I pull that off. Oh well, I'll rock it out and continue doing my thing.

3. Random fact from The_Freak: AJ's Steakhouse in Grinnell, Iowa sells a 205 ounce sirloin called the Big Kahuna.

The Ron Jeremy Clause

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Jamie Is Awesome?

I like to have people pick my blog titles from time to time. Today's title is from MrsAnswer herself, Jamie in Vegas. How so?

Me: (1:59:09 AM): Almost time for a new blog to be put up. Any idea for a title I could use?
MrsAnswer: (1:59:34 AM): jamie is awesome?
Me: (2:00:02 AM): That's what I'll roll with then.



I guess with her question mark there, she's not sure how awesome she even is. But as usual, we give the readers what they want around here, everyone is a part of the action.

You know what isn't too shabby? That it's 2008 and we're still going strong in here. It's not for a while, but once May rolls around, that's 4 years we've been hanging out in this spot. Who would've guessed that? I don't have any resolutions or anything crazy like that. I'm sure I could think of something just to say it, but that's what everyone else does. "I'm gonna start working out, I'm gonna stop smoking, I'm gonna watch my diet, I'm gonna try to treat people nicer." Uh.. no you're not buddy. We can see right though that. And no, I'm in a great mood, just saying what I think on most people's resolutions. Sure, you'll get the diamond in the rough who may do those things, but in general, they usually fail miserably.



Speaking of New Years, you're probably wondering how rowdy I got that night. You're expecting some drunken fest to just shock everyone, but no go on that. Sorry to let the troops down. It's funny because most of the past week, me and my crew had something going on every night it seemed. Whether it was playing ball, video games, going to a movie, watching NBA, or whatever. Then that night comes around and we didn't plan a single thing, go figure. So that night was spent at home, I'll call it a relax night and I didn't complain one bit. I ate Chinese (pineapple chicken, pork fried rice and sweet donuts) and flipped between BET and MTV's celebrations. Too much excitement I tell ya, not sure how I handle it all. It's not like my buddies did anything either that night, they were bums too, guess we're getting old.

Since we're talking about 2008, we're going to go down the road of darkness. I realize it's a sick thing to do, but me and my buddies still participate regardless, it's competition, why not? Yep, that would be the infamous Lobstah Celebrity Deathpool! This is ran by Commish Kasher and it's actually interesting. For the newbies to the blog, I'll break it down quick for you. Each year on December 31st, we turn in 10 celebrities who we "think" will die in the upcoming year. Yeah, that's pretty ruthless, you don't have to tell me that, but you can't say it's not at least intriguing. How do you score points? You take their age they die at and subtract it from 100. For example, if you have someone that is 53 when they die, you get a whopping 47 points. As an added twist, you get to distinguish one person as your "lock" pick. If that person dies, and mine did last year, you get double the points. What does my roster look like for 2008?



Barbara Billingsley (Mom on Leave It To Beaver)
Jimmy Carter (Former US President)
Bob Feller (Hall of Fame MLB pitcher)
Zsa Zsa Gabor (Actress)
Bobby “The Brain” Heenan *LOCK* (Wrestling manager)
Charlton Heston (Actor & NRA guy)
BB King (Blues guitarist)
Scott Hall (Wrestler; a.k.a. Razor Ramon)
Raven (Wrestler)
Nancy Reagan (Former First Lady)

I used a good bit of those last year, so I'll try some again. I had Lady Bird Johnson die last year as my lock. This year, my lock is currently in a coma (the bad one), but he's gotten out of some big time surgeries and things of the like in the past. Heenan is one of the all time greats, tough to see him go down this path. I only have two people of my 10 that are under 63 years old. Again, it's sick and demented, but you'd be surprised how many people do these things. That and it already has your attention and you want in for 2009.

It's been a while since I've had any Harry Potter updates. I believe it's time for another. The last time I mentioned, I was on Book 5: Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix. With work and me reading other things at the same time, this was a longer read and it was a big book. It is finished up though and was awesome. I've heard from a few people say that this book wasn't as good as the others, but I must have a different opinion on that. As far as detail and setting things up, this one had a lot more going for it I thought. The only complaint I had on this book was that the battle between Dumbledore and Lord Voldemort was too quick as far as pages dedicated to it. In this one, Harry finds out many answers he's been wondering about over the last five years. Now I'm started on Book 6: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Yep, I'm a dork, but it's time to get pumped up. People who have already read these know what I'm talking about.



You want a different topic? Ok, we'll talk about commercials. I'm sure you'll know the commercial I'm talking about since it's on every 2.3 seconds. You know the Kiafest commercial where the dude is dancing around like a fool to the maniac song? It's pretty cheezy, but I get a kick out of watching my Dad see the commercial. He sees it and refuses to have it on. He'll start lighting that bum up with f-bombs and going off on it like it ruins his day or something, good times. We need a YouTube of that. But we do have the clip of the actual commercial: http://youtube.com/watch?v=O1-mU04rPTU

Here's a topic bound to garner up some response. When do you take a shower? Uh oh, what direction am I going with this? I usually get mine late in the evening or at night. Sometimes I'll get a few in a day, I'm probably a bit of a clean freak when it comes to that, but I hate feeling dirty. But as the moral always goes, I can always clean my dirty self off, while our weekly Dirty Thug Ho is a different kind of dirty. Anyways, to the people that shower way early in the morning, do you not shower when you get home from work or wherever? Probably not and then you just go to bed dirty? I never understood that one, who wants to lay in a dirty bed? Hopefully you get a few showers a day. And on top of that, I talk to a lot of people who don't change their bed sheets often at all. What?? You serious with me on that? I feel bad just changing my bed once a week and some people go crazy long periods without changing it. So you lay around at work all day, sweat yourself to death, come home, lay on the couches and then jump into your bed all greasy. Well, better you than me. Just another one of my tangents I like going on, telling things how they are, but doing it in my normal laid back style.



It's time yet again for another Real World report. We're getting to the end of the season almost, it's flying by. Noirin is getting serious with Isaac and is trying to convince him to go on a long cruise with her. Isaac tells the house that he has two kids and they wonder if he's telling the truth or not. He tells a lot of wild stories, so they're not sure what to think. Alex come to hang on his birthday. The last they saw of him he was in the middle of the Parisa and Trish love triangle. Parisa and Ashli let the cat out of the bag with telling Noirin that Isaac has kids. Isaac tells the girls he doesn't to talk to them the rest of the night after they said that. Alex and Parisa get all over each other in the hot tub. Isaac ends up telling Noirin that the kid thing was a prank and she was all relieved. Isaac is one weird dude, but he's entertaining at least. The finale is in 2 weeks?

Bird's Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: http://www.myspace.com/nataliasingermav

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: This one comes courtesy of Dom, big props for this. I'm not sure how many blog readers will appreciate it, but I do, it's the latest Ice Cube video. This thing is pretty controversial and this is what rap is all about. Taking us back, Cube doesn't change his style for anyone and goes at it. Here it is, Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HzeZhCt5PVA



3 Quick Thangs:

1. Mondays can be dreadful, but we're gonna bring light on the subject. Birthdays for Monday, January 7th: We'll start things off with a C-list celeb, the bearded wonder, Kenny Loggins. He's 59 on Monday. Since we're on the singing path, John Cougar Mellencamp, 56. Actor David Caruso, he's hitting 51. News chick Katie Couric, she is doing it for the Big 5-0. American Idol judge Simon Cowell (and it starts in a few weeks!), 48. Hockey tough guy Donald Brashear, he's punching up heads to the tune of 35 years old. Actress Rachel McAdams, 31. Screech of Saved By The Bell fame, he's now at 30 and probably just as famous for his porn that is out there (as he's with a group of chicks) just as much as his show. You know you've all seen it online, don't lie. Golfing hottie Natalie Gulbis, she's 24. If you don't know her, check out some of her pics, real nice.

2. Chocolate syrup. I made a late night ice cream snack a bit ago. 6 scoops of vanilla, chocolate syrup, and some peanut butter thrown in. I may be little, but I can put away some junk food with the best of them. Anyways, let's shift back to chocolate syrup. When you get out the bottle of chocolate syrup and pour it on whatever, how can ya not be a pig about it and turn the bottle up and drink some of it first? You're not touching the bottle with your mouth at all, but do this in front of a bunch of people and they think it's the most disgusting thing ever. I'd say at least half of ya reading have done that before, it's a must every time I use it just because.

3. This Tuesday, you all need to gear up. How so? It's Season 3 of Rob & Big on MTV, 10:30 PM EST. If you've never watched, you've been in a cave, you're missing out. Also, props to everyone for wishing me a birthday for today and all of that, much appreciated. And if I must say so myself, I think that was a pretty good blog effort. I hope you enjoyed, see ya in a week or so!