Terlingua Chili Cookoff 1989

Today's topic is sponsored by none other than The_Freak. All credit goes to him.

Here we are with our last post from the month of March. In a few months, we'll rock out 5 years in this place, how time flies. Some of you have been around for the whole ride, whether that's an accomplishment or just showing how bored you might be on the internet, that's fine by me either way. What's the plan for today's post? We'll talk about a little roadtrip to Pennsylvania, hick accents, dumb Subway girls, fantasy baseball, a movie review, and much more. How's that for a mix of topics? It's weeks like these that the blog just writes itself and I can kick back.



Everyone knows I'm a huge wrestling fan and that I'll never grow up in that aspect. So be it, I like what I like. This past Friday, it was a mini road trip that I was due for. Along for the ride was my boy Spank as we headed north to scenic Elizabeth, Pennsylvania. It's in the Pittsburgh area, but for as much as I'm actually in the city of Pittsburgh, I've never been to Elizabeth. It's about 20 minutes away from the city. It reminded me a lot of home as that it's a small town with not a lot going on. The high school there is rock solid. It was nicer than most college campuses around here it seems. Oh, you're wondering why I went to Elizabeth, my bad. I did write that last week though, it was for a Ring of Honor wrestling show. I've made a few ROH trips to Cleveland before and you get your money's worth. This is their first trip to the Pittsburgh area in quite a while. I won't ramble as much on the wrestling side with details as I know that can bore people, but a few stories from the day I found interesting..

We have directions to the place, but it's basically off back roads and the like. I'm not one that is afraid to ask for directions. I know that's not a manly thing to do, but I'll ask and risk looking like an idiot to get my answer. Plus, doing that, it gives me an excuse to meet some characters that you might not otherwise. We pulled into this tire shop connected to an Exxon. We see a dude in there I'd guess his late 50s. We tell him where we are going and he knows exactly where it's at. This guy then became so animated in telling us directions that it was a sight to see. When we left, Spank said he was biting his tongue so hard not to literally laugh in this guy's face. He said if I would've looked at him at that point, he would have. The best thing about this guy's directions is that he gave precise directions. He was naming every little store and turn that we'd come across like we knew these little hometown shops. Coming from out of the area, that'd normally be tough to find, but this dude wasn't messing around. See, it pays to ask for directions, that guy started things right for the night.



We didn't have much time to kill before the show, so we hit up a nearby Subway. We may have encountered two of the dumbest girls I've seen in a long time. They're on the list anyways. Nice girls, but that won't get them far. Why do I say that? I'm ordering my sub and one chick says, "You're not from around here are you?" I said not really, but I'm just two hours south, so not that far out of range. She then gives us the comment that we get everywhere we go. She said we had huge southern accents and was just wondering. I know I sound like a big hick, but they must never talk to someone from way deep down south. Either way, it cracks me up that our accents are so different just a few hours away. If that's not enough, after the southern accent comment, she thought we were from Indiana. Indiana? Seriously girl? That's midwest, but our guess was that she must've thought Indiana was in the south? Who knows, poor girl. Learn some geography people.

Still at Subway, that store gave us a few more stories. Her buddy was helping make the subs and I give her my card that keeps track of your Subway points as I pay. She then says a penny is left on it. I'm sitting there thinking, it's not a cash card, it just keeps track of points for free subs, pretty simple. So what does she do? She throws it away and says it'd be pointless to just keep the penny. Like at the tire center, this time I was the one that could barely hold on to not busting out laughing at these girls. I had to explain to her basically how to do her job, which I did in a fun and joking around way. It didn't bother me, but more amused me than anything else. She then gets it out of the garbage and sits it down right in front of her. A few seconds later after she takes my money, she's in a panic looking for my card. I let her search and then point out that it's right in front of her, doh. Another thing one of them did: I ordered some new kind of ham sub. I asked what all was included on it, thinking she would tell me the basics which that particular sub offers. Nope, what does she do this time? She points to the picture with all of the condiments and says that I can pick whatever. Thanks for enlightening me with that bright piece of information, idiot. These girls were either that out of it or my southern charm worked, hah. I'll say they were that out of it.



We finally get to the show and the setup was pretty nice. It was in a fairly new building and I was a fan of that. For anyone who hasn't been to good independent wrestling before, you're missing out. You get your money's worth at these shows and then some, just minutes upon being there. We have nice seats there and Spank made a comment that was sad but true. He jokes that 97% of the people in the crowd were obese and it was ridiculous. I don't expect to see the world's healthiest people at a wrestling show obviously, but is it really that tough to stay in at least halfway ok shape? I've said it before, but it can't be fun to be that big and then give up on yourself without even trying to better yourself. Maybe I'm weird on that. Spank's 97% comment was pretty accurate. We saw some amazing matches that night. Our favorite was easily Austin Aries taking on Roderick Strong. They put on a clinic. The main event of KENTA and El Generico taking on Nigel McGuinness (current ROH World Champion) and Davey Richards. This was my first time seeing KENTA (yes, spelled in caps) and he's impressive. Everyone in that match held their own and brought it. Then we had the best wrestler in the world today, Bryan Danielson taking on Mike Quackenbush. It was also my first time seeing Quack in person, one of indy wrestling's best. A technical war right here and these guys are veterans of the game. Search around for ROH DVDs or even go to a show, you won't be disappointed one bit.

We're on our way home and stop at a gas station to find some road food. I wanted something to drink and out of nowhere they have protein shakes in there. At a gas station? Go figure. Due to the weirdness of that, we loaded up on some Muscle Milk. I got Strawberries 'N Creme and it's out of this world good. It's a 14 ounce shake and it has 25 grams of protein inside as well as all the other vitamins you'd need. It's a bit expensive, but as far as taste and what you get, it's awesome. There is a funny story at the same gas station. As I was paying, I noticed this older woman behind me. Inside the store, there was an ATM machine in there. Nothing out of the ordinary, right? She had this weird voice to begin with and was wondering if they had an ATM machine in the place. It was only less than 10 feet away from her, but I guess she didn't look, but how she asked it is good stuff. Don't you just say he letters, A, T, and M when you are associating that? Not her. "Do you have an Adam machine?" I guess that's how I'd type out how she'd pronounce it without just saying the letters. Who does that? The worker looked at her like she was nuts and I was walked out the door busting out.



I haven't done a movie review in a while, so I might as well jump in with that. The movie in question? Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li. To begin with, this movie enticed me enough just because it's based on the video game, but with a twist. Also, Street Fighter is the best fighting game of all time, I won't even argue that. Sure, I like Mortal Kombat and those, but they can't compare to Street Fighter in my mind. To date myself, it didn't get much better at the arcades when the place was packed and you were just demolishing everyone who stepped up in the game to do battle. Once the crowd gathered around the arcade, you knew you were tearing things up and people would get amped. Even if you're not a fan of video game and don't even know of it, you can still watch the movie. The storyline was nice, I'll give it that, but I wish the fight scenes were a bit better. Overall, this wasn't great, but I am still partial. The girl who played Chun-Li (Kristin Kreuk) did a pretty good job as did Bison (Neal McDonough) and Balrog (Michael Clarke Duncan). Duncan is 51 years old and the dude is jacked out of his mind, he's a freak. Chris Klein however, he was a terrible cast call for this movie. With all of that said, I'm giving this one 6.1 hadoukens out of 10. Shouryuken! I say if you're a fan of SF, go for it. If not, stay away.

I'll end with a quick deal on fantasy baseball. I'm in two leagues this year. Anymore than that, I wouldn't feel like I'd give my undivided attention to each. One is a 30-man keeper league that is crazy deep and it's called Chin Music. We have a roster of 55 players and it branches down to the low minors. You have to track your salary cap, contract years, etc. It's intense. Then we get to the big daddy, also known as A#BL. This is an 18-man keeper league with the #basketball/Lobstah group of ours that has been around for quite a while. Enough of that, it's time to list my team. In my opinion, I think I have the best infield in the league. I have a strategy every year, whether wrong or right, I tend to draft youth and potential. I also love average and speed and am not as big on homers as everyone else seems to be. Ladies and gentlemen, your 2009 St. Paul Apostles:



1. David Wright: 3B (Mets) *Keeper*
2. Johan Santana: SP (Mets) *Keeper*
3. Brandon Phillips: 2B (Reds) *Keeper*
4. Prince Fielder: 1B (Brewers) *Keeper*
5. Justin Upton: OF (Diamondbacks) *Keeper*
6. Stephen Drew: SS (Diamondbacks)
7. Jayson Werth: OF (Phillies)
8. Chien-Ming Wang: SP (Yankees)
9. Adam "Pacman" Jones: OF (Orioles)
10. Dioner Navarro: C (Rays)
11. Jair Jurrjens: SP (Braves)
12. Denard Span: OF (Twins)
13. Wandy Rodriguez: SP (Astros)
14. Kendry Morales: 1B/OF (Angels)
15. Grant Balfour: RP (Rays)
16. Brad Ziegler: RP (Athletics)
17. Gaby Sanchez: 1B (Marlins)
18. Juan Pierre: OF (Dodgers)
19. Asdrubal Cabrera: 2B (Indians)
20. Cory Wade: RP (Dodgers)

Birds' Dirty Thug Ho of the Week: We're going to the true Dirty Dirty in the ATL. www.myspace.com/downsoutheyecandy

Bird's Video Moment of the Week: Hood Fight! These are usually priceless. The punches these guys throw are pretty pathetic. There's even a guy with a Cookie Monster backpack there. Then one busts out some brass knuckles. Entertainment right here.





3 Quick Thangs:

1. Let's try some birthdays for Friday, March 27th. Who are we rolling out onto our carpet? Director Quentin Tarantino (more famous for Pulp Fiction, but go watch Reservoir Dogs right now) is 46. Footballer Randall Cunningham, also 46. You want another at 46? That'd be Easy Ed Pinckney of Celtics and Villanova 1985 fame. One of wrestling's all time greats, Kenta Kobashi, 42. We have who still ranks as probably the hottest celebrity in my mind, Mariah Carey, 39. I'll leave that for arguments. Staying on the singing path, we have Fergie who is 34 and I wouldn't have guessed quite that old. Brenda Song of Zack and Cody, 21.

2. You know what is underrated? Sunflower seeds. That's right, a good time killer and the taste is good too. Right now I'm chowing down on some David brand and it has to be original. None of the weird flavors for me. Softball season they come in handy too and we'll be playing again near summer, which I'll update everyone on of course.

3. Today's fact that you might not be aware of? The placement of a donkey's eyes in its head, enables it to see all four feet at all times.