You know.. I had one of those legendary days on the internet yesterday. Or maybe it wasn’t so legendary, but I’ll see what you think. I woke up yesterday at 12:30 PM (not too shabby for the summer) and go to bed at 6:45 AM. Throughout that time, I was literally online for rough 13½ hours. I got out of my seat just a few times all day. I ate “breakfast” from 12:30-1:00. Then I get online till around 3:30. Spank comes over until 4:00 since he had to go to a cookout and we watch some Rucker Park streetball on NBATV. After that, I hop back on here till around 5:15. Then I take Mom to the car dealer to test drive a new car and we go to the store to pick up a few things for dinner. After eating Italian sausage sandwiches and baked beans, I get a quick shower. Then, with nothing else to do, I hop back online. So this is about 7:30 and I’m on there till about 9:57. I actually get out of my seat and sit in my other room to watch the Real World finale. Then at 10:30, I’m back here. Over the course of the next 8 hours that I was awake, I think I got out of my seat twice during that time period. One was to make some taquitos which took about 8 minutes and I brought that up and another was to go wizz and brush my teeth, floss, and all of that fun.
I wasn’t tired at 6:45 when I decided to go to bed, but I figured I better. It was daylight and my parents had been up since like 5:15. Birds were chirping and people were actually getting their days started. Imagine that one. I can handle that during the school year when I have to, but I’m not about to be waking up early when I get to be a bum all summer. I think someone is always awake at this house and there are only three of us. Yesterday reminded me of the glory years of #basketball. We don’t have the crowds we used to (yet still get good chats), but back in the day you could walk in at any time of the day and get some great sports talk going. It was always classic to walk in around 5:00 AM and hang with whoever was still awake and see the foreign crew stroll in. Those were times that we only got out of our seats a few times a night too, so I wasn’t the only one doing that. Sad probably, but it was some great entertainment. How can you pass up some mean games of sports trivia? I can remember many a night when me and DerekHood would still be in there until around 8:00 AM. Anyways, I wake up today at 1:20 after setting the alarm. Setting the alarm that late? Well, you’ll have that when you’re up all night like an idiot with an awful sleeping pattern. But remember the moral of this story. Nobody can beat me in a staying up late contest if I’m put to the test.
Back to last night we go. Two big things were on my list of TV watching last night. Besides, TV watching is what I do best. Those two things if you were in a coma since my post the other day? The BET Awards and the Real World Finale. First up was the BET Awards. I get stoked for this every year. MTV Music Awards are nice too and I don’t miss those, but I like the BET ones better since it’s 3 hours of music I like instead of seeing some things I’d rather not. Live performances this year included Kanye West, Jay-Z, Usher, Ludacris, Janet Jackson, Alicia Keys, Outkast, G-Unit, and a bevy of others. I think that’s the only time in my life I’ve used the word bevy, so you guys get to experience the thrill of having some educated words in my Blog or something like that. Jay-Z had the nerve to bring Kid Rock and Dave Navarro on stage with him to jam guitars. You have to be kidding me. I’m a whitey just like those guys, but not many whiteys really fit in at the BET Awards. It was just a strange scene. I don’t think the thugs knew how to react. And I never was big on the whole rap/guitar jamming combo. Run DMC and Aerosmith worked it good, but that was straight old school and rare. Speaking of old school, my favorite part of the show was the 25 Years Of Hip Hop performances. Some legends of the old school rap world were there on hand to do their thang. Who showed up to perform? Public Enemy, The Sugarhill Gang, MC Lyte, Mellie Mel, and Slick Rick and Doug E Fresh. Slick Rick and Doug E had the roof coming off the place. Doing songs from 20 years ago and it had the place jumping. This year’s Lifetime Achievement Award went to the Isley Brothers. Ron Isley may be the most pimpin guy of all time. Dude is in his 60s and still can do it. If you’re into the pimpin R&B stuff, check out some of his stuff over the years. Five decades strong he’s been going. You’ve seen him in some R-Kelly videos if you don’t know who he is, also credited as Mr. Biggs. For the guys looking to set the mood, you can’t go wrong with some Isleys. I will not argue that one. Try it on your chick. Just a bit of the daily advice you get in the Madhouse, thank you.
Then we got the Real World San Diego Finale. I was disappointed in this episode. One, it was only a half hour, when the last one should always be an hour long. I feel strong on this one. Secondly, there was only one drama maker and that was Big Bad Brad getting cuffed up once again. They were going bar hopping one night and Cam (who is underage) was having problems with her fake ID at the club. In da club gettin tipsy. So as the door chick is looking at her ID and asks her questions, Brad for some reason grabs the ID out of the door person’s hand and yells, “Run Cammy! Run!” I felt like I was watching Forrest Gump. Then three huge coppers throw Brad against the wall, rough him up, and give him the cuffs. As he’s in there, they tell him that what he did can be considered as robbery since he took the item in question out of the worker’s hand. The worst they were going to tell Cam is that she wasn’t allowed in and take her ID away. Big deal. But Brad was thinkin Big Pimpin and it worked. As Cammy was riding home in a taxi, she saw Brad on the streets walking. She got all excited that he talked his way out of getting put in jail and she wanted him like she always does. Maybe I’m doing things the wrong way here in Shinnston. I better turn into a hardcore drunken tough dude to attract chicks. Then sweep the chick off her feet with some heroic deed. Brad isn’t quite CT from Real World Paris level (then again, who is?), but he did make a name for himself this series. Next week we get the Reunion Special, which should be decent. Frankie Lavigne is back and is wearing some crazy mess on her head, which comes as surprise to nobody.
That’s it for today I believe. I could write about the working out and ping pong escapades, but I’ll save that one. Right now I have to get so fresh and so clean in the shower after doing those two things and hit up some Wal-Mart action with Cork Dizzle. Wal-Mart is big excitement in West Virginia. What else is there to do? It’s too gangsta around here to do anything else.
And a scene from the greatest movie evarrrrr, The Sandlot, taken from the great movie site of IMDB.com:
[The Sandlot Kids and their arch-rivals come face-to-face]
Phillips: It's easy when you play with rejects and a fat kid, Rodriguez.
Benny: Shut your mouth, Phillips!
Ham Porter: What'd you say, crap face?
Phillips: You shouldn't be allowed to touch a baseball. Except for Rodriguez, you're all an insult to the game.
Ham Porter: Come on! We'll take you on, right here! Right now! Come on!
Sandlot Kids: Yeah!
Phillips: We play on a real diamond, Porter. You ain't good enough to lick the dirt off our cleats.
Ham Porter: Watch it, jerk!
Phillips: Shut up, idiot!
Ham Porter: Moron!
Phillips: Scab eater!
Ham Porter: Butt sniffer!
Phillips: Pus licker!
Ham Porter: Fart smeller!
Bertram: [sniffs] Ahh.
Phillips: You eat dog crap for breakfast, geek!
Ham Porter: You mix your Wheaties with your mama's toe jam!
Sandlot Kids: Yeah!
Phillips: You bob for apples in the toilet! And you like it!
Ham Porter: You play ball like a giiirrrrrrrrl!
[entire group stands in shocked silence]
Phillips: What did you say?
Ham Porter: You heard me.
Phillips: Tomorrow. Noon, at our field. Be there, buffalo-butt breath.
Ham Porter: Count on it, pee-drinking crap-face!